Sex and Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend of over one and a half years told me he won't...

By No O-face - 18/01/2011 03:19 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of over one and a half years told me he won't give me a hand job because "it's awfully wet down there," and he isn't "a fan of other people's bodily fluids." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 858

You deserved it 6 442

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Same thing different taste

Wet noodle

By Anonymous - 01/08/2021 14:01

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't like having sex with me, because I get too wet and it makes him go limp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 581

You deserved it 107

What a wuss

By Anonymous - 30/03/2021 08:01

Today, my boyfriend flat out refuses to ever give me oral because it grosses him out when I squirt, and there's no way he wants that anywhere near his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 588

You deserved it 329

It's not you, it's him

By Anonymous - 02/10/2021 23:01 - Italy - Benevento

Today, after telling my boyfriend I never achieved an orgasm with any of my past partners, and therefore telling him what I need to get there, he won't even touch me, let alone do anything "down there" because he has never done it on any of his past girlfriends, and thinks it's gross. I make sure to always be fresh and clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 182

You deserved it 277

By Shelby - 14/08/2019 02:00

Today, my boyfriend told me that he hasn't showered in over a week, because he "doesn't like to be wet." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 679

You deserved it 231

Who are these people ?

By ShelbyIsAwesome - 04/03/2021 17:01

Today, my boyfriend informed me that he hasn't showered in over a week because he "doesn't like to be wet." FML

I agree, your life sucks 886

You deserved it 137

Backwards ass logic

By Anonymous - 29/08/2019 06:00 - United States - Chattanooga

Today, my boyfriend told me that it's "disgusting" to wash your "rear end" and that he has never, and will never, do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 995

You deserved it 232

Pencil

By thought that was a good thing - 07/06/2022 01:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend once again asked me if I could “not get so wet down there” when we have sex, because it “feels funny”. Ummm, even if I could control it, I never knew it was a problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 425

You deserved it 170

Double standard

By NoSexForMe - 13/07/2014 07:46 - United States - Rancho Cucamonga

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 813

You deserved it 8 659

By InvAzn - 14/12/2017 06:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate with each other, starting with some foreplay. Before he fingered me, he put on a blue surgical glove, claiming that "down there is dirty and smelly" and he didn't want it on his hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 587

You deserved it 2 365

Underperforming

By ThatIsNotIt - 24/01/2021 04:02 - United Kingdom

Today, having regularly given my husband blowjobs, I suggested, mid-session, that he could maybe reciprocate. He complained that I was wet, begrudgingly licked for about a minute and then gave up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 428

You deserved it 182

ryanst 7

Tuesday 18 January 2011 8:57

Since when was fingering called a hand job?

Doortje 29

Tuesday 18 January 2011 9:12

Just say you love him and want to support him in every way, so if he's not a fan of other people's bodily fluids, you won't be either.

Comments

perdix 29

Tuesday 18 January 2011 14:49

Are you dating Gen. Jack D. Ripper from "Dr. Strangelove?"

thumper_tigr 0

Tuesday 18 January 2011 14:56

Is he gay? what guy doesn't want to touch a girl's vajayjay? Besides, why is the subject just now coming up after a year and a half, how are you guys??

thumper_tigr 0

Tuesday 18 January 2011 15:02

and I meant to say, how old are you guys....

EvilDave 13

Tuesday 18 January 2011 15:05

YDI for dating a whiny, squeamish, metrosexual. Personally, I have no problem either as long it is a woman I find attractive.

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 18 January 2011 15:05

OP, does your boyfriend realise that he doesn't actually have to put his hand inside your ****** to stimulate the ******** (do girls have hoodies?) . Just send him down there with some toweletts or something.

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 18 January 2011 15:09

Next time you're giving him a hand job, aim it at his face so he can understand what his bodily fluids are like.

qjdb 8

Tuesday 18 January 2011 15:28

Nice cross-reference :-)

MissFukMyLuck 0

Tuesday 18 January 2011 15:10

I bet ya I could roll one better 27

DaveTheBrave20 0

Tuesday 18 January 2011 15:31

your boyfriend is a pussy

areanii 0

Tuesday 18 January 2011 15:55

Are you a boy or a girl? If Boy: That's your fault for being gay. Your girlfriend probably wouldn't mind doing that as much. If Girl: That sucks balls. You need a new boyfriend. And Honey? It's called fingering, not a hand job.

knibbsy 4

Tuesday 18 January 2011 17:00

79, donkey never specified a location. A "wet area" is a wet area; donkey didn't have anything in his post to imply where the spot might be. His post is incorrect actually, since there are many wet spots on guys that come from bodily fluids, including underarms, foreheads, butts, and scrotums. I don't care what he may have "meant"; when he wasn't specific in his post, that leaves many doors open.