Love: Today, my boyfriend picked me up from school. It was an unusually...

By Anonymous - 21/09/2012 19:10 - United States - Clinton

Today, my boyfriend picked me up from school. It was an unusually sweet gesture from him, and I was flattered. That is, until he told me to sit my ass in the back, so his dog could ride in front with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 062

You deserved it 4 778

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Same thing different taste

By ditched?? - 06/08/2010 09:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were driving around town in his car. To my surprise he took me out to lunch. As we were leaving, a girl walks up and asks if he had room for one more for a ride, sadly he only has two seats in his car. Guess who had to walk! FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 362

You deserved it 5 717

By surprise - 15/01/2015 20:30 - United States - Starkville

Today, I wanted to surprise my roommate by picking her up from class with her dog. Her dog decided to surprise me by dumping a load on my passenger seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 094

You deserved it 16 503

By Anonymous - 27/11/2011 22:46 - United States

Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 457

You deserved it 3 604

By Anonymous - 14/08/2018 15:00

Today, my boyfriend's car broke down on the way to the gym, so he called his dad to give us a ride. On the way, his dad talked about how much he hates me and our relationship, as if I wasn’t sitting in the back seat directly behind them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 061

You deserved it 213

Hairy situation

By hair today gone tomorrow - 22/04/2022 19:00 - United States

Today, a guy I liked came to pick me up for our first date. As he opened the car door, I noticed nearly an inch of dog hair on every surface of the interior. Not wanting to get it all over me, I asked if we could take my car instead. He was so “insulted” he drove off and left me standing there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 287

You deserved it 426

Hold me close

By chachi - 28/09/2009 18:25 - United States

Today, I awoke in bed with my boyfriend and his dog. After some pushing and prodding, I thought my boyfriend was trying to move the dog out of the way to cuddle with me. It turns out, he was moving the dog closer to him. My boyfriend would rather spoon with his dog than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 126

You deserved it 6 758

What's going on?

By sexychica - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I pulled up next to my boyfriend at a stoplight. He was in the back of a police car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 909

You deserved it 6 440

By tukkies - 03/10/2010 09:23 - South Africa

Today, my friend and I offered a hot girl a lift home from campus. I was sitting in the passenger seat and she climbed in behind me. As I adjusted my seat forward to give her more leg room, my friend pulled off - slamming my seat back into her legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 146

You deserved it 4 257

By 5220 - 21/04/2009 13:13 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were driving back to college. He broke up with me 2 hours into the 3 hour drive. I had to sit in the car with him for the last hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 821

You deserved it 4 631

Motormouth

By Anonymous - 17/08/2020 17:08

Today, my boyfriend and I were riding in the back seat of his mom’s car and she kept talking at him non-stop. He responded only in grunts. When at some point I informed her that her son had been asleep for several minutes, she just kept on talking to him anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 104

You deserved it 117

syki 22

Saturday 22 September 2012 2:03

Guess you're not his main bitch.

BubbleGrunge 18

Saturday 22 September 2012 2:07

Next time he ask for sex, tell him the dog is probably more than willing.

Comments

DidUrMom_Twice 6

Saturday 22 September 2012 2:36

Maybe in his opinion the dogg

andiewithlove 21

Saturday 22 September 2012 3:19

The dogg........the dogg what!? D: How dare you leave me hangin'! (p.s. Your hip newfangled way of spelling "dogg" is soooo cool!)

whohasanaccount 2

Saturday 22 September 2012 4:51

But he did your mom... Twice

Munda1 4

Saturday 22 September 2012 2:40

That sucks OP. You should've taken the dog in the back with you lol

Iknowsomestuff 9

Saturday 22 September 2012 2:42

Unless it was a limo that sucks.

Evaloscity 6

Saturday 22 September 2012 2:53

If your ass got in the back, where did the rest of you sit? (;

SqueakyChipmunk 21

Saturday 22 September 2012 2:57

Dogs before Hoes! Wait, that isn't right...

yoloswagg54 9

Saturday 22 September 2012 3:03

Doggy style anyone?

redbandit9877 12

Saturday 22 September 2012 3:16

Well dogs are man's best friend, not girlfriends.

Silent_Thrill 17

Saturday 22 September 2012 3:29

But what if the girl looks like a dog... is it a tie?

FunnyMedic 7

Saturday 22 September 2012 3:25

Leave him. :-)

RedSnuwolf 4

Saturday 22 September 2012 3:25

Why the hell are you dating that asshole?

gregonfire 4

Saturday 22 September 2012 3:31

Did he at least put some dog food back there for you?

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I agree, your life sucks 2 971

You deserved it 1 921

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I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 43 839

You deserved it 7 941

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I agree, your life sucks 36 749

You deserved it 13 528

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I agree, your life sucks 613

You deserved it 1 035

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I agree, your life sucks 32 550

You deserved it 5 629

Today, I wore a new perfume to a first date in park. Halfway through, he kept sniffing the air and asked, “Do you smell onions?” Turns out the perfume reacted badly with my skin chemistry, making me smell like a taco stand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 100

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I agree, your life sucks 877

You deserved it 787