Miscellaneous: Today, my brother broke his mountain bike, so he stole mine,...

By jfc, how just how - 19/05/2013 19:56 - United Kingdom - Milton Keynes

Today, my brother broke his mountain bike, so he stole mine, and managed to break it as well. Then he made some kind of franken-bike out of parts from both, and messed that one up too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 251

You deserved it 3 783

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Potato_Lord - 12/11/2015 04:11 - United States - Madison

Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 784

You deserved it 1 475

By WhatTheF - 11/07/2016 05:42

Today, after far too many times of my brother stealing food out of my own personal mini fridge, I bought a lock and chained the handles together. I came back to find that my brother had responded by breaking the doors off their hinges. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 910

You deserved it 1 130

Property is theft

By mu5icadd1ct - 08/07/2016 13:22

Today, my sister stole my bike and gave it to her boyfriend. When I told my parents, they said it was fine, because I wasn't using it anyway. The reason I wasn't using it was because it needed a new tire, and I was saving up for one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 666

You deserved it 907

By Amandajean32 - 05/08/2010 00:02 - United States

Today, I came home from work to find the lock to my bike busted and my bike stolen. The worst part was a nicer bike was sitting right next to it without a lock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 835

You deserved it 2 631

Thanks, "Bro"

By probably on death row soon - 25/12/2015 18:32 - United States - Winter Park

Today, my brother "pranked" me by dropping my new laptop out my bedroom window. He'd set up a saran wrap safety net below to catch my laptop safely, but he didn't secure it well enough. My laptop is completely fucked and he won't accept responsibility because he didn't mean to break it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 197

You deserved it 1 595

By Anonymous - 28/05/2016 23:05 - Netherlands

Today, my brother "borrowed" my car and keys without asking me. He came back 4 hours later, alone and pale faced. It took half an hour of questions, interrogation, and finally threats before he admitted that my car is sitting in a ditch a few miles away, probably totaled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 281

You deserved it 901

DIY FML

By Anonymous - 03/05/2021 02:02

Today, after spending hundreds of dollars on parts and tools, and hours of research to teach myself how to perform the work, I upgraded my bike. It was also today that I made it 4 blocks from my house on my first ride before I hit a curb and broke my collarbone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 000

You deserved it 170

The blame game

By Shattered - 23/11/2022 02:00

Today, my brother got mad at me for breaking the screen on his phone. He'd already dropped it so many times that the whole screen was cracked to the point that you couldn't see anything on it, but for some reason, I am fully responsible for its destruction because I accidentally delivered the finishing blow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 692

You deserved it 189

My little boy

By Anonymous - 16/04/2021 00:30

Today, my 12 year-old son came home with two broken arms after finding an awesome place to ride his bike. He found a sweet jump and his handlebars broke. He's currently in slings and waiting for an appointment with a surgeon, the breaks were so bad, the hospital couldn't reset them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 104

Nicked

By TheJeremyMoe - 11/08/2019 14:00 - United States

Today, my bike was stolen. Partially. Since I always locked it up, some asswipe thought it would be funny to steal the handlebar stem and the seat, leaving the actual handlebar dangling by the brake cables. Since there was no way to steer or sit, I had to carry my bike one mile back to my dorm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 692

You deserved it 117

Ace132 20

Monday 20 May 2013 0:37

Brother of the year!

perdix 29

Monday 20 May 2013 0:44

It's a sign that you both should take up jogging.

Comments

avres13 14

Monday 20 May 2013 22:31

Why wasn't your bike locked?

catsie_fml 14

Tuesday 21 May 2013 0:31

He needs to pay for it...

AlexiAwesome 10

Tuesday 21 May 2013 0:35

He doesn't do well under pressure! And neither does the bike. Haha made sense to me

babegirlprecious 12

Tuesday 21 May 2013 5:12

Sounds like something my brother would do! Hahah

ohSNAPyall 26

Tuesday 21 May 2013 7:48

Busy day.

ThatOneGirlLucy 3

Monday 3 June 2013 23:23

that would be amazingly funny to watch. sorry about your bike though :/

gerardwhy 21

Wednesday 17 December 2014 5:10

Wow, makes me wonder how he managed to screw up that badly.

NutellaCongress 10

Friday 12 June 2015 15:49

That is.....strangely impressive

BLARGTEHTACO 20

Tuesday 13 June 2017 21:54

I don't even know what to say. this is an amazing feat not only of human ingenuity but of human stupidity as well. this fall may have just made my day. I'm genuinely amazed.