Conspiracy theorist and Miscellaneous: Today, my brother started ranting about how fluoridated water...

By Anonymous - 15/06/2016 17:07 - United Kingdom - Hull

Today, my brother started ranting about how fluoridated water is a conspiracy to "turn people gay". I said the government must be doing a shit job of it, since he's been drinking the stuff longer than I've been alive and is still married to a woman. He punched me so hard, my vision blacked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 715

You deserved it 2 128

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Same thing different taste

Dirty mind

By how are we related?! - 14/08/2022 00:00

Today, I realized just how fragile and idiotic my brother is. At a family get together, I bought a giant box of popsicles for all the kids to enjoy. He refused to let his sons have one, because according to him, “it looks gay”. I swear my mother found him by the road or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 044

You deserved it 108

The punch from beyond the grave

By Anonymous - 01/04/2022 14:00

Today, my brother‘s will read that everything would go to our other brother, so long as he punched me for having an affair with my his wife. So now I have a black eye. I’m gay, but I've never told my family. I didn't have an affair with his wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 287

You deserved it 192

C'mon man!

By Pooping - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Aldergrove

Today, while I was at work, a coworker began ranting about his theory that the government is going to create a disease that sterilises everyone, and use the antidote to control the population. I was just trying to take a crap in the stall next to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 278

You deserved it 2 002

By anonymous - 08/12/2014 23:23 - United States - New Baltimore

Today, I found out I have sodium fluoride poisoning. Apparently, my water has a high level of sodium fluorine. I've been drinking much more water lately trying to be healthier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 042

You deserved it 2 764

By Anonymous - 23/02/2013 06:28 - United States - Calhan

Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 571

You deserved it 3 452

By Normal - 13/12/2009 04:39 - United States

Today, my brother and I got in a fight and he told my friends that I am mentally disabled. They believed him. Apparently, "everything makes sense now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 003

You deserved it 3 875

Compassion, brah

By Anonymous - 25/12/2020 11:01

Today, I finally told my brother that I was being sexually harassed at work. I'm 22 and my brother is 41, and he literally told me that I don't even know what sexual harassment is, and then laughed in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 127

You deserved it 143

By Monster-in-law - 09/08/2017 16:30 - United States - Sherwood

Today, I got a call from my brother-in-law's doctor. Apparently he's made threats and fantasizes about killing me. "Notifying you is the protocol for things like this" he said, and ended the conversation with, "have a nice day." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 984

You deserved it 273

By Anonymous - 15/07/2019 14:00

Today, as revenge for a prank I played on him last week, my brother took things way too far and loaded my milkshake with so many chocolate laxatives, I’m now in hospital. I’ve had so much diarrhoea in the past few hours, I’m dangerously dehydrated and had to be put on a saline drip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 019

You deserved it 346

By Anonymous - 06/09/2015 06:59 - United States - Wittenberg

Today, my older brother offered me a cigarette. I took it and barely took a drag before he socked me in the arm and lectured me for taking the offer. He's an alcoholic, and smokes daily. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 172

You deserved it 9 608

Tripartita 44

Thursday 16 June 2016 0:48

"WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING?! Did you look through my internet history? Bro… you alright?"

Welshite 39

Thursday 16 June 2016 0:45

You might want to imitate him and wear a tinfoil hat for good measure. You never know when the government can be listening in. They're coming for you, OP.

Comments

zainman13 26

Thursday 16 June 2016 1:34

Wow! That must have been quite an experience

Pizzacheese4 13

Thursday 16 June 2016 1:41

Wow, that sucks. How long did it take for your vision to come back?

pandalover69 26

Thursday 16 June 2016 2:37

It sounds like your brother has a secret and is trying to come up with an excuse for it.

Bob_Gray 6

Thursday 16 June 2016 2:39

What the hell did he take insult to? The fact that you called him straight? Or does he just get violent when he's contradicted?

domolovesyoshi 33

Thursday 16 June 2016 5:42

I'm going with the latter

janfleury 19

Thursday 16 June 2016 2:45

I think you may have hit a nerve with him.

MandieL 27

Thursday 16 June 2016 10:06

Sounds like it's the brother that did the hitting.

PulpFact 8

Thursday 16 June 2016 3:58

Sounds like someone is deep in the closet

lusanna 19

Thursday 16 June 2016 4:07

I'm sorry op but I applaud you for standing up to homophobes like your brother

AggieMike77 12

Thursday 16 June 2016 4:16

Your brother is a fucktard.

wmayrhofer 18

Thursday 16 June 2016 4:17

It's more of a scam rather than a conspiracy because the levels are too low to poison you. Just don't eat fluoridated toothpaste.

blackmater12 6

Thursday 16 June 2016 4:26

ouch? sue him

Garrett2818 21

Thursday 16 June 2016 5:04

I doubt OP got busted up enough for it to be worth all the trouble of a lawsuit. Also once the lawyer takes his cut then no one wins. Quit being a sue happy schmuck 23 you're better than that.