Animals: Today, my cat had the bright idea of giving birth in the dryer,... - FML

By HannaMD - 26/01/2015 15:21 - Canada

Today, my cat had the bright idea of giving birth in the dryer, on top of all my new white towels. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 517

You deserved it 5 956

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Same thing different taste

By JeffeeBojangles - 28/02/2012 12:46 - United States

Today, my grandma seemingly decided that it was a really nice day to put my cat in the dryer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 462

You deserved it 2 556

By nocatlover - 21/01/2010 21:40 - United States

Today, I woke up to the news that my son had put the cat in the dryer the night before. He didn't turn it on, and the cat is just fine, but now I need a new dryer so my clothes won't smell like cat urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 709

You deserved it 3 398

Febreze time

By catpeecathy - 14/09/2009 04:20 - United States

Today, I was looking in my laundry basket for a clean tank top to wear. As I felt around, I realized that most of my clothes were still wet after two days. After asking my mom what was wrong with the dryer, I found out that for two days my cat had been using my laundry basket as a litter box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 664

You deserved it 5 433

By KittenTime - 26/05/2011 21:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I witnessed the miracle of life. More specifically, my cat giving birth on my bed at four in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 098

You deserved it 7 545

By Anonymous - 08/10/2010 16:33 - United States

Today, I came home to find that my pregnant cat had given birth to a stillborn kitten in practically every room of the house. She had then rubbed her butt around the house, leaving bloody stains everywhere. When I tried to clean the white carpet, the bleach turned it green. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 845

You deserved it 5 996

By benji - 01/11/2011 19:02 - United States

Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 397

You deserved it 38 591

By Noname - 12/03/2009 22:08 - United States

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 150 410

You deserved it 22 966

Human! Come quick!

By He got a lot of treats for that - 09/03/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, I woke up at the ungodly hour of 4AM to my cat clawing at my door and yelling at me. Normally I'd just wait until he stopped, but he was persistent, so I got up and opened the door to see what he wanted. He then corralled me to the laundry room. My dryer was on fire. Good boy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 687

You deserved it 134

By Anonymous - 03/10/2012 16:29 - United States - Santee

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 984

You deserved it 5 416

Welcome home!

By dumb - 02/06/2009 15:33 - United States

Today, my new subletter moved in. Within 6 hours, one of my cats took a dump on her pants. I freaked out, lit some candles to hide the smell, and threw her pants in the washer. When the cycle was done, I found her cell phone at the bottom of the washing machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 010

You deserved it 25 690

Next

Top comments

arachnophile 13

Monday 26 January 2015 23:44

Actually it sounds like the cat DID have a pretty good idea and found a soft, warm place to do it. Linens can be cleaned. At least it wasn't your couch or carpet. Congrats on the new kittens!

Sunflower1919 19

Monday 26 January 2015 23:40

At least they're white so you can bleach the hell out of them!

Comments

lidool_zoppy 8

Wednesday 28 January 2015 22:15

hilarious!!! hahaha

Psiioniic 4

Wednesday 28 January 2015 22:23

Kittens; Tumble dry, permanent press, with one dryer sheet.

Freda92 12

Wednesday 28 January 2015 23:58

Well, aren't clean towels/sheets needed during birth giving? :p

DizzyDreamer90 15

Thursday 29 January 2015 3:48

But kittens!

Animaldude55 4

Thursday 29 January 2015 7:03

I cringed while reading this

berkeleyjake 13

Thursday 29 January 2015 9:05

at least it was your cat

truestoryjames 11

Friday 30 January 2015 1:31

Animals, you got to love them

sugarmonster42 7

Friday 30 January 2015 19:59

You have kittens. Just put the towels in the washer again! Kittens are worth everything

willliamfriend 18

Sunday 1 February 2015 7:43

Why was the dryer door open allowing your cat to go in there? And it was probably warm it there and that's why it choose that place.

JKPwnage 27

Tuesday 3 February 2015 5:58

Congrats on the kittens:3

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The Top

Today, I tried to sneak a snack from the kitchen without waking anyone up. In my stealthy quest for a late night sandwich, I managed to knock over a stack of pots of pans and woke up the entire frat house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 413

Today, my wife upset herself by ringing my best friend to see if he would lie about where I was, and he did. Now my wife thinks I get my friends to lie for me to cover up my cheating. I’ve never once cheated. This feels like the next level up from cheating on her in her dreams, because she's crazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 475

You deserved it 138

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 4 035

You deserved it 592

Today, the dorm above me had their toilet pipe break and leak through my ceiling, so I have to move rooms. The worst part was I answered the door to let the repairman in while I was in pajamas, but he looked uncomfortable. I didn't notice until he left that my 'thing' was poking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 649

You deserved it 473

Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand. Bookmarked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 521

You deserved it 4 589

Today, I overheard a waitress calling me a cheapskate because I left a $2 tip on a $9 tab. When I told her she was ungrateful, rude, and unprofessional, she burst into tears and told the manager I’d threatened her. I was then banned from the restaurant, all while the little twat smirked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 015

You deserved it 238

Today, I found out that conducting CPR and saving a man's life means nothing if you break his ribs. He is suing me for $10,000. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 494

You deserved it 419

Today, my daughter got home from her first date, angry at me because I scared her date so much that he left halfway through. I swear I didn’t do anything except shake his hand and remind him her curfew is 10pm. Am I in the wrong here? FML

I agree, your life sucks 488

You deserved it 111