App
FML for mobile
Free
Open in app

By quit fucking up my life - 23/11/2013 01:08 - United States - Kenai

Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML
I agree, your life sucks 48 660
You deserved it 4 925
May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

DocBastard 38

Is he ******* crazy? What the hell is wrong with him? He's going about this all wrong. That's way too direct. The correct thing to say is, "I have a rusty scalpel, plenty of lidocaine, and an intimate knowledge of male anatomy. Have a nice time tonight."

142 6

Comments

olpally 32

Wow, reminds me of how a family guy episode would begin. Lol. Please follow up with this! Your dad is being just a little over-protective. :/

8 14
ninjuh_wingman 29

I get fathers wanting to protect their daughters, but this might be taking it a little far.

13 7
ItsATwinThing 9

Your dad is just trying to say to your boyfriend "Don't hurt her." Not in the best way of course but a good stab at it.

27 6
Ambient25 24

It's just posturing. The girl I took to prom had a dad like that. As soon I showed up he took me around the house, brought me over to a wall full of boxing plaques and medals he'd won, and told me "It's been a while since I knocked anyone out...but I might just have to again at some point" as he stared at me... Not to mention though all guys kind of dread the day a young man comes calling for their daughter.

50 2
jamiejones10 8

Today, a man took a knife out of his kitchen drawer and told me that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. That man is my girlfriend's father. FML

1 7
perdix 29

It would be funny if your boyfriend gave your dad a two-hour disquisition on what it feels like to stab people, including sound effects and visual aids. Then, he should muse on what it would be like to stab someone other than a hobo, a ***** or an inmate.

17 1
Ambient25 24

For using "disquisition" in a sentence, I'm proud of you Perdix

6 1
isuckwithnames 22

When my friend's girlfriend's dad would meet one of his daughter's male friends? He would get his sword and start sharpening it in front of him, trying to scare him. My friend didn't even notice it and just thought the sword was cool

8 2