Because breaking up with someone for the sole reason that they're trans is an act of transphobia.

How can it be transphobia? If you're dating men and you're not into women and that man decides he wants to live as woman, that is completely against your sexual preference. It's like saying that breaking up with your boyfriend because he's come as gay is homophobic. Or him breaking up with you is somehow phobic.

No it's not. If you're attracted to females, why would you be with someone who doesn't want to be a female anymore? So that means if a straight person refuses to date a gay person they're homophobic?

I'm trans and ironman that's complete bullshit. It's people like you that make us all look bad.

18- Crawl back into that hole you call Tumblr. You're embarrassing yourself.

Iron man, my brother in law is FTM and says that you're so full of shit that it's coming out your ears. It is not transphobia, like breaking up with a guy because they are gay isn't homophobic. He says that you're a horrible representative for the trans community because you're spreading lies

#18 Actually it's not trans-phobic to end a relationship if your partner announces they are going to transition and you're an idiot for thinking that it is. I don't date men. If my wife decided to transition our marriage would need to end for both our sake because neither of us would be happy in the end. I'd still support her and want the best for her but as her friend, not her partner. Assuming that your partner has some obligation to stay with you and support you through your transition is narcissistic and just plain wrong.

18, I believe that it can be an act of transphobia, but doesn't always have to be. If your bf or gf tells you they are transgender and you had no idea before but you said "ewwwww" and broke up with them immediately, sure. That would be transphobia. If your personal orientation does not include the gender that your partner is "changing" to, then that would require a conversation and time, and could possibly result in the end of the relationship. It would be painful for both parties but ultimately necessary for both to be true to their identities. It is just as wrong to expect someone to not be transgender for a relationship as it is to expect a non transgender person to change their sexual orientation for a relationship.

To be perfectly honest, if you don't want to be in a relationship with someone, for any reason, it's perfectly fair to break up with them. It's kinder to leave someone you no longer love or are attracted to than stay with them and make both your lives miserable. It's not transphobic to leave someone who's transitioning. If gender is important to you in a relationship and you realise someone is not the gender they initially presented as it's reasonable that you may no longer wish to pursue the relationship. That's not discriminating based on being trans, just following your sexual preferences. The only way this could be construed as transphobic is if OPs ex was presenting as female when they were together and then she left her because she found out she was assigned male at birth.

No, it isn't. You are attracted to who you are attracted to! If you are a gay female and you are attracted to girls then your girlfriend comes out as transitioning to a man it isn't your fault. It isn't the person who is transgender's fault either. There are people who wouldn't care and would stay no matter what, but it is rarely the case. In fact I think in some relationships it is the person who is transitioning that leaves. They could stay friends, because you may love that person, but you may no longer be in love with them or sexually attracted to them.

My boyfriend is FTM and he thinks you're an idiot

OP probably did, but once her ex came out, they assumed OP was transphobic and lied about her ex cheating as a cover for her hatred. That's what I gathered from this.

Ah. Got it. Solid friends, OP.

You're 100% correct. Any sensible transperson would agree with you.

In the past I've ended relationships because I did care about the person. Relationships are not as simple as some people want to believe. That's why it can take dozens of relationships to finally find that one you want to spend forever with. OP left because her gf cheated - but even on this post people are whining about transphobia. Everyone has a type and there are people who only date trans people and then there are others who are simply not attracted to them. That's not transohobia, that's just having a preference.

Actually, the majority seem to agree with you. Everyone has the right to end a relationship on their terms. I'm a gay man, and my boyfriend is pansexual. If he came out to me as a Trans woman, I would still care about her, but I don't think I could continue to be with her for the simple fact that I am 100% homosexual. I don't find any women attractive. It wouldn't be either of our fault.

I seriously had to look up what 'pansexual' meant...

To be fair, not /many/ people outside of the LGBT+ community can remember half the terms and slang out there. It IS a lot.

Because OP is using feminine pronouns and is supportive of her ex, I think it's safe to assume that the ex is transitioning from male to female.

Thanks, #54. I've been reading all these comments and barely any focus on the cheating! OP did well to support her ex even after the cheating, but for her friends to jump to conclusions is shitty. Chin up, OP! You're a good person :)

Call me an asshole or whatever, but I completely disagree with this neat, tidy file cabinet for cheaters that's labeled 'scum of the earth', as if humans were that one dimensional. Not justifying cheating in any way, but you don't know the person. You don't know if they're sincerely sorry or if they're really innate assholes that will keep on hurting people. I'm aware this will get downvoted into Oblivion, but that's what I get for having a differing opinion, I guess.

You actually have a point. Not everyone cheats simply because they're an asshole. I knew a girl who was berated constantly for cheating on her boyfriend and claiming she didn't know why she did it. Later she was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder, which can cause impulsivity, mood swings, hypersexuality, etc. Humans are definitely not one dimensional.