Miscellaneous: Today, my ex dropped by to pick up a piece of art he'd left when...

By red - 27/09/2012 11:37 - United States - Portland

Today, my ex dropped by to pick up a piece of art he'd left when I threw him out a month ago. While here, he visited the restroom. Tonight, my shampoo smelled like urine. And he called at 11pm to say he'd ''rubbed one out'' on my new boyfriend's toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 085

You deserved it 8 266

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By GasAttack - 07/09/2009 13:32 - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 474

You deserved it 8 533

By Username - 14/03/2011 06:53

Today, my ex-girlfriend moved out. I came back to a sparsely furnished home; she'd even taken the shower head, my beard trimmer, and the soap from the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 090

You deserved it 5 662

Give it back

By upset room mate - 18/08/2011 06:59 - United States

Today, after our old roommate left because he was too dirty for us to live with anymore, we found out that our new roommate has "borrowed" our shampoo, towel, toilet paper, liquor, without replacing them. I wish we still only had to clean up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 138

You deserved it 4 305

By nicole - 22/09/2011 10:31 - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 399

You deserved it 5 428

By Anonymous - 28/11/2011 03:00 - United States

Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 643

You deserved it 4 159

By Anonymous - 28/02/2012 18:20 - United States

Today, I found out my roommate had mistaken my toothbrush for his dog's. So for the last month he's been using my toothbrush on his dog. The dog's favorite meal? Fresh cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 307

You deserved it 2 826

By Anonymous - 21/01/2011 09:25 - Monaco

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm "high maintenance." I'd only asked him to use deodorant and brush his teeth. He hasn't had a shower in over a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 234

You deserved it 6 079

By WellGroomed - 26/11/2015 15:20 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, my housemate walked out of the bathroom with my toothbrush in his mouth and asked, "You're not one of those people who cares if someone uses their toothbrush, are you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 665

You deserved it 1 597

Roommate from hell

By Anonymous - 13/10/2020 10:57 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, after I had the place to myself for a while and it was easy to clean, my roommate returned and I woke up to trash piling up, dishes everywhere, and luggage full of sweaty laundry. Oh, and it smells like poo again, because he doesn't regularly shower. I want to scream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 041

You deserved it 167

New man

By Anonymous - 19/01/2022 08:01

Today, my ex-boyfriend, who broke up with me the day before yesterday, got a job at my workplace. He shows up dressed his best clothes, clean-shaven, and with perfume. For the 10 months we dated, I only saw him in baggy tops, sweatpants, a weird beard, and the smell of sweat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 060

You deserved it 240

KBear3109 29

Thursday 27 September 2012 15:59

Have him arrested!

fleur_de_fevrier_fml 22

Thursday 27 September 2012 15:59

Well revenge is a dish best served cold...

Comments

christonabike 3

Thursday 27 September 2012 19:09

Also, new guy moved in already? TRAMP!!!

ultra_notorious 26

Thursday 27 September 2012 19:58

That guy is my new hero!!! Gonna try that sometime.

superfly9234 3

Thursday 27 September 2012 20:01

that guy is cool in my book

donut_gurl 8

Thursday 27 September 2012 20:03

you should have just have given him the artwork and sent him on his way.. live a learn i guess... not that you deserve any of that though.

DanielPienaar 4

Thursday 27 September 2012 20:41

you threw your boyfriend out a month ago, and already have a new one living with you?..

newmandotcom 6

Thursday 27 September 2012 20:43

Haha!!! Your boyfriend had another mans semen in his mouth!!!!!

the17doctor 12

Thursday 27 September 2012 20:57

Am I the only one wondering why you have a new bf living with you only a month after kicking the old one out? I'm sure there are plenty of waus the OP wouldn't come off a bitch but I doubt that's the case.