Love: Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I... - FML

By AlonsoKold - 07/04/2014 23:39 - United States - Jackson

Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I don't like her Facebook statuses enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 250

You deserved it 5 867

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By GlueAndCarrots - 29/05/2015 15:05 - Canada - Markham

Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I crossed the street without holding her hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 217

You deserved it 4 353

Well played

By fmfb - 07/06/2011 23:09 - United States

Today, my girlfriend got into my Facebook account and changed our relationship status to single, just to see which of my friends would "like" it. After revealing to me what she did, she now says I can no longer be friends with anyone who liked it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 763

You deserved it 6 279

By WTF - 12/09/2013 23:08 - United States - Plainfield

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She later put on Facebook that, "Today was a great day!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 270

You deserved it 4 487

By .... - 24/12/2013 02:48 - United States - Modesto

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 079

You deserved it 3 736

Smothered

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I wrote "I love you" on my girlfriend's Facebook wall. She completely freaked out and accused me of being "too clingy" and that I'm starting to feel more like a stalker than a boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 885

You deserved it 8 115

By Anonymous - 09/11/2014 08:37 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me via Twitter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 968

You deserved it 3 865

By danthecomplicate - 29/09/2011 02:28 - United States

Today, my girlfriend changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'It's Complicated' because I didn't give her my last cookie. This happens all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 285

You deserved it 12 484

By yankeeboy123 - 12/01/2015 05:03 - United States - Pompano Beach

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her reason? Not enough guys have been liking her photos on Instagram since we started dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 647

You deserved it 3 324

By Anonymous - 30/10/2013 23:39 - United States - South Gate

Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me over Facebook. Unfortunately, she "accidentally" posted it on my wall instead of sending me a message, so the whole world could see it. My mom liked her post. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 256

You deserved it 3 912

Bye bye love

By Anonymous - 05/03/2021 11:01

Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend. Apparently, it's my fault because I act like I don't care… and guess what? She's posting little embarrassing details about me on her Facebook wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 851

You deserved it 191

Next

Top comments

glowbaby 15

Tuesday 8 April 2014 8:52

Set your relationship status to single.

mohamed_H 21

Tuesday 8 April 2014 8:54

Does your girlfriend happen to be a 5 year old?

Comments

SimplyBird 9

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:03

Better start liking she sounds dangerous...

mudslut712 15

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:09

welcome to today's generation were the internet is more important than real world(sorry been in the military whole adult life so some stuff might not make sense) its a sad sad culture now

falconjade 19

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:17

Welcome to today's generation, where we no longer know what proper grammar is

Welshite 39

Tuesday 8 April 2014 14:14

#20: Welcome to today's generation, where people criticize another's grammar, and yet forget proper punctuation.

falconjade 19

Tuesday 8 April 2014 22:35

Touché, 54.

falconjade 19

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:09

I'd hate to date the people who are voting "You Deserved It" on this one

drshn 22

Tuesday 8 April 2014 18:00

I have not. Just saying!!

Ma_Nikka 24

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:10

After you set your relationship status to single and it shows up on her page, like it

falconjade 19

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:20

This is a perfect addition to the first comment, you are the future

Beepbeep7 14

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:11

Sounds like she's insecure and gets validation from Facebook likes.

Winnie453 9

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:17

Did she say that in a facebook status? Because if so, you should like it.

mackdeezy 22

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:17

I see no problem here. You'd be dodging a bullet.

brandoneyez1 25

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:32

I would have left her for taking fb so seriously.

10showgirl 16

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:33

I get on facebook about once a month... Some people live on facebook. I just don't get it...

Marshalley 3

Tuesday 8 April 2014 9:38

Dump her just do yourself a favor and dump her

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9

Keywords

Love Party Lonely Awkward ADHD Transportation Cars Ironic Vacation Work Mental health Miscellaneous Grandparents Accident Covid Health Kids Annoying Cute Shopping Coworkers Dogs Animals Photography Art Videos Exhausted Sex Intimacy Money

The Top

Today, I was at a wedding reception with loud music. A guy told me that his sister couldn't be there because she "went home to be with her boy." I said, "That's too bad, she's missing a great party." He paused and repeated, "She went home to be with her LORD." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 265

You deserved it 4 813

Today, at work, I was looking for my lost wallet. After hours of looking I gave up and went home. The wallet then showed up in my mail box with an envelope marked "To the asshole." I opened the letter and it was filled with poop. My wallet too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 728

You deserved it 5 075

The Top

Today, I boarded a trans-Atlantic flight by myself, and struck up a nice conversation with the passenger across the aisle. Before we even took off, the man in front of me unbuckled, stood to face me, and asked me to please shut the hell up. "It's a 9 hour flight, and you're VERY loud!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 492

You deserved it 37 019

Today, I went for a run to get in shape for the first time in ages. I put on my running shoes and hit the pavement. Halfway through, the sole of one shoe came off, and I had to hobble back home in embarrassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 554

You deserved it 111

Today, at work, I was criticized for mentioning the actual subject of an email in the subject line, as well as using a text marker to make relevant information stand out. Apparently, this is confusing for some people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 977

You deserved it 90

Today, I finally got a cable box for my TV. When I was connecting the cable, my tv fell and shattered the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 405

You deserved it 331

Today, at my hotel, I spent over an hour dumpster diving trying to locate a pair of shorts for a spoiled brat that one of the cleaning staff accidentally threw away. When I finally found and returned them to the family, the father insisted they weren't the right ones. Spent all day smelling of trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 382

You deserved it 1 130

Today, I asked my boyfriend if I could call him "love muffin". He asked if he could call me "muffin top". FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 128

You deserved it 36 233