Intimacy: Today, my grandmother saw me for the first time in years. "Not...

By Anonymous - 12/06/2012 11:58 - United States - Gorham

Today, my grandmother saw me for the first time in years. "Not all your clothes have to be as tight as condoms, you tramp," is probably the nicest greeting she's ever given me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 315

You deserved it 9 125

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Username - 13/09/2010 23:19 - France

Today, I found out my grandmother doesn't wear underwear when she bent over in front of me in her inappropriately short nightgown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 666

You deserved it 2 853

Nice to see you

By meeee - 13/02/2021 23:01

Today, I saw my 89 year-old grandmother naked. She just moved in with us and apparently, she has an "open door policy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 916

You deserved it 108

By Anonymous - 28/11/2014 12:16 - Australia

Today, we spent the day with my grandmother. During a family conversation, my sweet little grandmother looked me up and down, and without any hesitation said, "I remember you being so beautiful," before looking at my mother, mouthing, "What happened?" and laughing. She's 87. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 701

You deserved it 3 271

By Sgt_Jackrum - 05/02/2016 10:27 - United Kingdom - Oldbury

Today, we had my grandmother with dementia round for tea. She looked me up and down and said, very matter-of-factly, "Well, with a figure like that, no one will rape you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 337

You deserved it 2 399

Mad beliefs

By Anonymous - 12/04/2009 00:20 - United States

Today, my grandmother gave me a huge speech on being abstinent until marriage. Being the honest person that I am, I told her I wasn't a virgin anymore. Instead of being mad and telling me I was going to hell. She asked me what my favourite things to do sexually were. And told me hers in detail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 254

You deserved it 20 795

By bob - 01/09/2011 05:29 - United States

Today, my grandmother refused to wear clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 470

You deserved it 2 718

By Anonymous - 27/11/2014 18:51 - United States - Athens

Today, some idiot introduced my grandmother to yoga pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 135

You deserved it 3 748

By agentile - 02/12/2010 01:14 - United States

Today, my grandma was leaning over in front of me, vacuuming, while wearing a V-neck shirt. Out of instinct, I glanced at her chest. She's 75. I checked out my 75 year-old grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 637

You deserved it 60 487

By Anonymous - 24/05/2009 01:41 - United States

Today, I took my grandma to the hospital to visit her estranged husband who she hasn't seen in years. After a thoroughly disasterous visit, we're waiting in the carpark and my gran strokes my face and tells me I have a lot of facial hair. I thought she was going to thank me. And I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 760

You deserved it 4 034

By cAPITOLpORN - 23/06/2015 15:57 - United Kingdom - Romford

Today, my grandmother ripped her pants. We all got a big view of her pink thong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 273

You deserved it 2 216

StanSmith_fml 9

Tuesday 12 June 2012 18:48

Grandparents. They say the truth, even if it hurts.

Kajol123 5

Tuesday 12 June 2012 18:49

At least she acknowledged you....unlike mine :/ baby steps, OP

Comments

madipoo_LOVE23 0

Wednesday 20 June 2012 4:35

I feel for you my grandfather thinks I'm gonna be on the next season of sixteen & pregnant..

Marissa1586 18

Sunday 24 June 2012 20:48

AHAHAHAH XDDD THAT'S why you never see each other!

diamondbaby16 4

Tuesday 17 July 2012 10:23

Well she sounds wonderful :3

meaganinja 12

Monday 30 July 2012 15:28

She has a point.

Sentrylegend 3

Wednesday 15 August 2012 9:54

I feel sorry for you

xLunaKillzUx 5

Monday 1 October 2012 16:28

You shouldn't wear tight clothes, I've yet to see why girls think its cute to show off fat rolls.

gmian 34

Sunday 28 July 2013 5:03

Well, OP here. Just found this FML I posted a while before I has an account... My grandmother and I have actually gotten pretty close, even though she still has that sharp tongue of hers. She's been saying that to me for a while before the FML was posted, but she was saying it in Romanian, and I didn't know it translated into condom. I did eventually figure out what it means... Also, my clothes really weren't that tight, for all of you saying I shouldn't show off my fat rolls...

worldclassrager 39

Thursday 9 October 2014 16:12

Oh the elderly...the feelings were mutual I hope...

marina1996 5

Tuesday 22 August 2017 18:53

on one hand i understand why youre frustrated but on the other come on really? you cant dress up nice to go see your grandmother who you havent seen in a long time. my normal wardrobe is black t shirts and denim jeans but when i visit my grandparents i wear slacks and a long sleeves button up.