Miscellaneous: Today, my grandpa told me he was going to be eating out tonight,...

By -_- - 13/05/2015 16:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my grandpa told me he was going to be eating out tonight, and I asked at which restaurant. He replied "Your gran's room." and winked. I didn't need that mental image, at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 159

You deserved it 3 201

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Same thing different taste

Let her have her fun

By WHY GRANDMA - 17/06/2023 20:00 - United States

Today, I was at a restaurant with my grandma. A young, ripped gentleman suddenly walked through the door and my grandma looked at him and shouted, "Look! Eye candy!" as loud as she could. He heard it and was extremely embarrassed. To make it worse, my grandma is a widow, so she might have actually meant it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 703

You deserved it 193

By lovingthis - 09/01/2013 16:48 - United States - Largo

Today, I walked in on my grandfather smiling at his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 205

You deserved it 5 249

By notsoclean - 24/12/2010 21:14 - United States

Today, I was at the dentist's, getting my teeth cleaned. He thought it would be funny to suddenly go on in detail about the fantastic sex he and his wife had the night before. I was unable to speak the entire time. The dentist is my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 482

You deserved it 3 697

By Brie - 05/09/2011 13:00 - United States

Today, my grandmother pulled down her pants and screamed, "Kiss my ass" in the middle of a packed restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 207

You deserved it 3 204

Eye bleach

By Anonymous - 06/05/2009 01:39 - United States

Today, my grandparents are in town for the weekend and are staying in our guest bedroom. This morning I went upstairs to get a drink of water, only to see my 75 year-old grandfather standing stark naked with the fridge door open. He then asked me if we had any coffee creamer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 498

You deserved it 2 904

Not funny

By Anonymous - 09/10/2015 18:02 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, while having lunch with my grandparents, my grandpa's eyes glazed over, his head fell and he slumped in his chair. I started panicking and almost cried, thinking he was dead. Then he laughed and said "Just kidding. I'm fine." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 171

You deserved it 2 697

By dummy - 22/05/2009 05:12 - Canada

Today, my grandpa took out the family for dinner and paid for everyone. He paid the bill and my family and I were waiting by the door. I realised I probably should thank him for dinner. I turn around without thinking and give him a big hug and say thanks for dinner Grandpa. It wasn't my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 304

You deserved it 44 908

By Unappreciated Grandchild - 06/11/2012 07:59 - United States - Bel Air

Today, I looked over to see my grandfather looking thoughtfully at me. Feeling flattered because he rarely shows affection, I waved at him. He then said, "I was looking out the window" and continued to stare past my head out of the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 886

You deserved it 2 137

By lvegadelgado_6 - 10/08/2015 14:32 - United States - Deerfield

Today, while I was doing my hair, my grandpa walked in, dropped his pants, and started taking a crap in the toilet right next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 556

You deserved it 2 141

By Anonymous - 23/11/2014 12:52 - United Kingdom

Today, my grandpa came into my room and asked for a pen. As I gave it to him, he let rip the foulest fart I've ever smelled in my life, and walked out without a word. 2 hours later, the smell is not only still there, it's filled the room. Looks like I'm sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 314

You deserved it 2 984

cdgrayson 21

Wednesday 13 May 2015 23:33

Your grandpa has a better sex life than most of us on this site...

brvnnx 18

Wednesday 13 May 2015 23:38

Grandpa didn't choose the Thug life, the thug life chose grandpa.

Comments

Cads1 24

Wednesday 13 May 2015 23:41

He just wants you to know that he is getting more action than you.

mustangbravo 27

Wednesday 13 May 2015 23:46

Awww, let grandpa have his fun. He's earned it.

Destinee_1 13

Wednesday 13 May 2015 23:53

I hope my sex life is like that when I'm a grandma

Jennandco 25

Wednesday 13 May 2015 23:57

Well now she's over menopause, the sex life can be better than ever

Eleora 19

Thursday 14 May 2015 0:03

Your grandpa is a boss. Lol

HoboRain 16

Thursday 14 May 2015 0:09

Your grandpa is clearly the master

iShanny 13

Thursday 14 May 2015 0:20

This seriously made me laugh out loud. Not sure what that says about me, but your grandpa sounds hilarious!

gintwinsmoore 20

Thursday 14 May 2015 0:44

Damn that's damaging...wish you could scrub that out of your brain but you just can't. Sorry, OP!

dakatabg 31

Thursday 14 May 2015 0:45

Grandpa knows whats up

Zaketh2112 10

Thursday 14 May 2015 0:49

And soon Grammy will too

BananaCoconutty 26

Thursday 14 May 2015 0:57

What a wild man!?

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The Top

Today, I came home from a rough day working two jobs to find a plate of cookies on my desk with a note from my roommates saying, "You deserve it!" I happily broke one in half to eat and discovered they contained coconut. I'm allergic to coconut, a fact that both of my roommates are aware of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 559

You deserved it 3 748

Today, I took my friend to the E.R. for an eye infection. While waiting, I proclaimed, "Why, Jesus?!" jokingly. Well, the gigantic biker sitting next to me, who had found religion in prison and is a born again Christian, was not pleased. He spent the next four hours trying to convert me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 569

You deserved it 19 251

The Top

Today, I went to the tanning bed. I laid down in the bed and turned it on and the fan started blowing. There was a terrible smell and I thought it was the person before me. Then I realized it was just the fan blowing my sweaty feet towards my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 881

You deserved it 32 420

Madame is not pleased.

I agree, your life sucks 247

You deserved it 164

Today, my husband suggested we start making pornos online to make ends meet. I told him, “You bust so quickly, it’ll have to be a TikTok.” He’s been pouting all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 218

You deserved it 453

Today, stood in line for hours to see the new Harry Potter. Unfortunately, once inside the theater, I was stuck in the bathroom with the runs for the entire length of the movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 944

You deserved it 7 026

Today, the creepy skin care guy at the mall with the heavy accent asked me if I was pregnant. When I said no he replied "Oh, too many donuts then?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 730

You deserved it 7 931

Today, I laid out my feelings to my friend with benefits, and asked if we could get together and talk. Now I'm being ignored, and my heart is shattered. I always fall for Mr Wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 579

You deserved it 1 099

Same thing different taste

Let her have her fun

Eye bleach

Not funny

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