Holidays: Today, my husband and I decided to take a romantic trip to the...

By AreYouSerious - 27/08/2009 00:57 - United States

Today, my husband and I decided to take a romantic trip to the beach. We got pulled over, and shortly thereafter he was arrested. Just so happens you can't miss child support payments for your twelve year old daughter without getting a warrant. He has a daughter? We've been married for 14 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 822

You deserved it 3 667

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Fooled Wife - 14/09/2018 14:30

Today, my husband was arrested on 2 felony charges in a sting. We've been married 5.5 years, had almost enough money for a down payment on a house, were trying to get pregnant, and had a non-refundable trip to London planned. We are now broke and on the verge of divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 637

You deserved it 285

Divorce impending

By Anonymous - 04/05/2021 20:01

Today, I got a phone call from my husband in jail. He was detained for statutory rape. The girl was his 15 year-old coworker at McDonald’s. He’s 42. I can’t tell which is worse, the fact that we have a daughter the same age, or that he actually wanted me to bail him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 826

You deserved it 124

By Lenny_R - 08/12/2016 19:53

Today, I got pulled over for having an expired registration. I also found out my husband hasn't been paying for my car insurance. Luckily, I didn't get arrested because I had my baby with me. They towed my car and gave me 2 tickets and a court date. Oh, and the cop sent me a friend request. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 422

You deserved it 903

Teenage jealousy

By Anonymous - 22/06/2022 16:00

Today, we missed our flights to our dream honeymoon destination, which we were lucky to get with so many flight cancellations, because my selfish stepdaughter anonymously called the airline to report us for drug smuggling, all because I married her dad this afternoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 160

You deserved it 981

Is this Woody Allen?

By ShockedToDeath - 08/07/2021 02:01

Today, I found out my husband got my 22 year-old daughter pregnant. Not only that, he’s drained our savings on her including a new iPhone and Macbook, designer clothes and handbags, etc. His defense, in all seriousness, was, "She’s not even my biological daughter, chill out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 354

You deserved it 166

While I'm here…

By Anonymous - 26/04/2023 05:00 - United States

Today, my longtime partner had a mental breakdown and broke into my home. After forcefully having to get him out of my house and dealing with Police all morning, my 16-year-old daughter decided to tell me that she's pregnant. She thought one hour after a break in was the right time to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 916

You deserved it 181

By Broeman - 13/09/2009 23:10 - United States

Today, I found some charges on my credit card for two round trip tickets to Las Vegas. Turns out my daughter and her stoner, unemployed boyfriend stole my credit card and flew to Vegas over the weekend to get married. I paid for my daughter's elopement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 018

You deserved it 4 355

Fumbled

By Dean - 23/07/2024 03:00 - United States

Today, the cops showed up to my house and served me a child support order from the girl I had a one-night stand with, and who'd promised me she would abort the baby. All this was two years ago. My wife of three years was in the house and heard everything. She packed up her things and told me she’ll be calling her attorney. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88

You deserved it 1 544

Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

By ReginaW - 14/03/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, my husband sat me down to tell me he’s filing for divorce as he’s fallen out of love with me and loves my 19 year-old daughter (his step-daughter). Furthermore, I’m off the lease when it expires next month so they can live together. We have a 2 month-old son. He replied, “OK, and? I’ll pay child support.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 864

You deserved it 112

Walk on the wild side

By Anonymous - 11/11/2020 07:01 - United States - Tyler

Today, I had to go get my fiancé's car so it wouldn't get impounded after he was arrested at 12 a.m. and charged with a felony. I just got out of prison in March, and we get married next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 645

You deserved it 3 280

Muffinish 0

Thursday 27 August 2009 9:13

Ouch. **** your life, also **** the 12 year-old daughter's life for having a deadbeat dad.

allmidnighteyes 10

Thursday 27 August 2009 9:08

On the next episode of Divorce Court....

Comments

anonacs 0

Thursday 27 August 2009 10:20

Are you asking us if he has a daughter? Why the question? **** I hate people, just get to the ******* point.

alyzandra 0

Thursday 27 August 2009 10:24

Way to recap yourself, PaulieeBooMN.

celiba_fml 0

Thursday 27 August 2009 10:26

this one is a real fml, not just a **** my day..

dully_fml 0

Thursday 27 August 2009 10:28

rhetorical question, dumbass!

AntiChrist7 0

Thursday 27 August 2009 10:34

Don't marry a cheating ass. YDI

sublime93 0

Thursday 27 August 2009 14:00

Best comment here.

luxornv 0

Thursday 27 August 2009 10:34

He was doing a very good job keeping that secret.

moonlight_daze 8

Thursday 27 August 2009 10:44

YDI for marrying a douche-bag.

Spider_fml 9

Thursday 27 August 2009 11:40

Yeeeeeeeees, cuz she could obviously have known that back then...

Miso_Soupu 0

Thursday 27 August 2009 11:03

Go for alimony in the divorce. Make him contribute financially to two lives he wrecked.

crazylady78 0

Thursday 27 August 2009 11:09

I'm so sorry! My ex-husband cheated on me after twelve years, I can't even imagine how you feel finding this out. Is there any chance it is a name error? Take your time before you make any decisions, nothing has to be done today. Hugs!

lo1337a 1

Thursday 27 August 2009 11:15

I interpreted this as 'he doesn't have a 12 year old, I'd know after 14 years. What a case of mistaken identity/police idiocy.'

AtoZnumbersand_ 1

Thursday 27 August 2009 11:34

Lol. I met my father when I was 15 for the first time.. He had been paying child support as well though. His wife and two sons had no idea. I don't know why people put up with this- If I found out my husband had a secret child his ass would be out on the street so fast...