Intimacy: Today, my husband said that when we have sex he almost gets... - FML

By Hannah - 21/12/2010 17:01 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband said that when we have sex he almost gets as excited as he does when he gets a chopper gunner on Black Ops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 061

You deserved it 7 909

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Heated gaming moment

By Anonymous - 26/11/2014 19:41 - United States - Los Angeles

Spicy

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 140

You deserved it 6 808

Headshot!

By Amb - 01/06/2010 23:56 - United States

Spicy

Today, I realized my boyfriend makes the same noises in bed as he does when he's winning in Call of Duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 072

You deserved it 6 199

By Noname - 16/02/2009 00:33 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 045

You deserved it 10 600

By Anonymous - 22/11/2014 18:18 - Ireland - Kilkenny

Spicy

Today, I was having some rare good sex with my husband, when he suddenly said, "I'm fuckin' BORED," and pulled out so he could go play his video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 181

You deserved it 5 620

By S…… - 09/01/2011 10:18 - Singapore

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 389

You deserved it 5 766

By Anonymous - 25/08/2015 19:54 - United States - Phoenix

Spicy

Today, my husband told me that he is done having sex because it eats up his online gaming time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 006

You deserved it 3 538

By Dejected - 07/12/2009 19:16 - United States

Today, I finally got a hold of my husband, who I haven't actually talked to in two and a half weeks, since he's deployed and it's hard to chat. He told me he couldn't talk because he was in an epic battle. In Call of Duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 189

You deserved it 4 729

Pragmatic

By Anonymous - 15/03/2010 14:05 - South Africa

Spicy

Today, after confronting my husband about lack of intimacy in our marriage, I found him playing with himself. His response to my shock was, "This is less work and less involving." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 966

You deserved it 4 955

By Anonymous - 21/03/2009 07:18 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 359

You deserved it 13 299

Concentration face

By Nuttree - 01/08/2010 07:02 - United States

Spicy

Today, I noticed my husband chews his tongue while we are having sex. He also does this while he is playing World of Warcraft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 439

You deserved it 6 885

Next

Top comments

mrbiffle 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 22:38

hahaha I told my girl the same thing

cusof 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:30

This is your girl

Comments

yay_knee 3

Wednesday 22 December 2010 4:38

Well it's hard getting a chopper gunner and it really is exiting. I've gotten a chopper gunner at least 10 times and I always scream in excitement. (I once got a chopper gunner and had just called it when the game ended- I was pissed) So next time just try something sexier or wear kinky clothes to get him excited. (Or just watch a whole bunch of **** and take notes)

yay_knee 3

Wednesday 22 December 2010 4:38

Well it's hard getting a chopper gunner and it really is exiting. I've gotten a chopper gunner at least 10 times and I always scream in excitement. (I once got a chopper gunner and had just called it when the game ended- I was pissed) So next time just try something sexier or wear kinky clothes to get him excited. (Or just watch a whole bunch of **** and take notes)

unidentified_sta 5

Wednesday 22 December 2010 4:38

Make that thrice.

c0mn 0

Wednesday 22 December 2010 4:44

maybe you should spice it up. I'd take a chopper gunner over lazy sex anyday.

yay_knee 3

Wednesday 22 December 2010 4:44

OOPS I didn't mean to do that ^

hpaiste 2

Wednesday 22 December 2010 4:49

you mean "in Black Ops." silly

xenno92 3

Wednesday 22 December 2010 5:27

he must not get chopper gunners that often

CODgirlsrule 0

Wednesday 22 December 2010 5:41

I must say, being a chick and all, it is pretty freaking exciting to get chopper gunner! black ops is beast! :) hang in there chick, you excite him!

retardthinkswhat 3

Wednesday 22 December 2010 5:50

OP you should be proud

SmAsHiNwInDoWs 0

Wednesday 22 December 2010 5:58

WHO DOESNT?!?! seriously. its amazing. aahhhhhhhh. RED DIAMONDS EVERYWHERE MUHAHAHAHA

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Well. I must admit when I first received today's illustration, seeing the massive pliers pop out kind of freaked me out. Then I reached the last panel and I'm not sure if it's out of anxiety relief or what, but I laughed so hard I might have choked a...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Today, my longtime crush, who turned me down because he’s “sick of women”, just got into a relationship. He made it Facebook official, with photos of them and everything. Wanting to even the score, I commented, “So it seems your sickness of women is cured, huh?” He bitched at me for “ruining his moment” and deleted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 996

The Top

Today, I went to the doctor's office because I was sick. The male nurse led me back and when he weighed me, he said "Why do I get all the beefy girls today?". FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 635

You deserved it 5 734

Today, I started doing cardio at my local gym with a basic exercise bike because doing weightlifting by itself wasn't having an effect on my weight. Since I'm out of shape, I did 15 minutes instead of the standard 30. I had to stop at 10 minutes because my legs were so sore they nearly gave out on me when I stood up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 295

You deserved it 128

Today, when taking a group picture with my closest friends, a passing parent congratulated us on getting into the same university for next year. She's wrong. They're all going to Cambridge, except for me. I was rejected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 074

You deserved it 5 927

Today, I finished up a week of this new "Liquid Foods" diet I learned about from a friend. After a week of denying myself of my favorite foods and eating only non-fat yoghurt and smoothies, I have not only gained 2 pounds, but have diarrhea. Just in time for my anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 427

You deserved it 31 761

Today, returning home, I found my roommate trying one of my bras. When he saw my shocked face, the only thing that came out of his mind was, “Seriously, even my boobs are bigger than yours.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 593

You deserved it 59

Today, my little brother grabbed my boobs and wouldn't let go until I pried his hands off. When I told my mom, her response was, "Get over it. He's a little kid who doesn't know any better." He's 14 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 048

You deserved it 3 785