Kids: Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives... - FML

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By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 04:18 - United States

Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives in the cakes for my son's 7th birthday party. Over 40 kids came to the party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 603

You deserved it 4 116

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Same thing different taste

By Noname - 14/03/2009 15:16 - United States

Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming to blow out his birthday cake candles. Turns out he was in the other room, quietly changing his disabled friend's diaper. FML

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Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML

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By ilikecake - 29/05/2009 11:12 - United Arab Emirates

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By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Crystal Lake

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 891

You deserved it 4 921

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By cakehater - 21/08/2011 07:35 - United States

Today, I'm a host at a restaurant. We had a birthday party for a couple of 15 year old boys and their friends. I went to clean the bathroom at the end of my shift and discovered cake everywhere, including all over the urinal. They were even nice enough to draw a smiley on the mirror with icing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 322

You deserved it 2 468

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By Anonymous - 24/09/2023 16:00

Today, as I'm 7 months pregnant and craving sweets, I helped myself to my MIL's birthday cake a little early. The family got so angry, they actually made me leave the party. My husband agreed with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 152

You deserved it 2 629

By Anonymous - 06/08/2009 06:13 - Australia

Today, I had to call poison control because my idiot son swallowed a bunch of baking soda to "make a volcano in his tummy." FML

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You deserved it 17 300

By Anonymous - 25/01/2013 05:39 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML

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Great boyfriend, part 2

By thanks a lot - 04/05/2020 05:00

Today, my boyfriend made me a latte. It tasted off, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I drank it. Turns out he put laxatives in it as a prank. The idiot couldn’t just use one or two. He used so many that I had to go to the ER for severe dehydration after puking and shitting for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 942

You deserved it 229

By Anonymous - 16/01/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 980

You deserved it 3 696

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Top comments

evnflr 7

Thursday 26 January 2012 8:51

Now that's a shitty situation.

mama2b3 20

Thursday 26 January 2012 8:53

First of all your husband sounds really immature. Second, over 40 kids!!? Holy crap!

Comments

Amy78_fml 11

Thursday 26 January 2012 12:09

40 kids is a bit much for a birthday party. It would take an eternity to open that many gifts. Food tampering is never funny. Your husband is a dick.

marisadc79 0

Thursday 26 January 2012 12:11

Wow what an immature dad. He'd be cleaning up all the mess if it was me. Really awful thing to do and to a group of little kids.

hecseferblade 1

Thursday 26 January 2012 12:20

what a shitty party

kyyllee 3

Thursday 26 January 2012 12:23

looks like your going to brown town, for a good while!

AwkwardPartyBear 24

Thursday 26 January 2012 12:36

Sounds like that party was the shit!! (no? Bad pun?.. Okay :c )

AwkwardPartyBear 24

Thursday 26 January 2012 12:36

Sounds like that party was the shit!! (no? Bad pun?.. Okay :c )

Chad_the_Brony 0

Thursday 26 January 2012 12:54

I would've laughed at the situation. But I'm a very sadistic person.

jenssss 0

Thursday 26 January 2012 12:54

Definitely a shitty situation D:

knockoutmouse 8

Thursday 26 January 2012 13:00

OP, I strongly suggest that you encourage, or even demand that your husband seek professional counseling. Food adulteration and administering drugs without the recipient's knowledge is problematic enough on its own, but the fact that he did this en masse to a group of children should seriously call into question his decision-making abilities, if not his mental health. I'm not saying that as an insult, but as a genuine concern. It's possible that he could further endanger or seriously harm his own child(ren) with another "prank" like this.

thiscrazything 1

Thursday 26 January 2012 13:01

You married an asshole.

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