Embarrassing, Sextoys and Intimacy: Today, my mom came into my room to have a heart-to-heart talk....

By BrokenVow - 30/07/2009 12:02 - Canada

Today, my mom came into my room to have a heart-to-heart talk. My dildo was sitting on the nightstand. I didn't notice until she told me to make sure the dog didn't get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 981

You deserved it 53 801

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/05/2016 01:40 - United States - Walnut

Today, I walked in on my mom in the bathroom, washing a dildo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 286

You deserved it 2 451

By tracy4191 - 18/09/2016 05:21 - United States - Ponchatoula

Today, I found out my mom sleeps in my room when I'm at college during the week. I discovered this my bumping into her dildo with my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 558

You deserved it 737

By Anonymous - 01/12/2014 17:55 - United States

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 732

You deserved it 15 209

By bottomdrawerraider - 17/11/2010 17:13 - United States

Today, my mother was over visiting. My three year old ran out of my room chasing the cat with his toy. He smacked the cat with it, the cat scratched him, he dropped it and ran away. I was busy with the baby so I asked my mom to take the toy away. She walked back holding my pink dildo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 061

You deserved it 12 201

By Anonymous - 28/11/2016 06:34

Today, I was talking to my mother when we both heard a continuous buzzing noise. Unable to locate the source of the noise we gave up. About an hour later, my mother yells down the stairs to me. Turns out my dog stole my vibrator, chewed it and presented it to my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 414

You deserved it 1 582

By Mygawdwhy - 21/01/2018 01:30

Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 187

You deserved it 2 060

By what-the-what - 29/10/2017 13:00 - United States - Mount Pleasant

Today, my mother called me at work, freaking out about my dog, so I panicked. What was wrong? He had a hard-on and she'd never seen that happen before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 782

You deserved it 300

Great chat!

By eric - 16/03/2011 07:31 - United States

Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 236

You deserved it 96 457

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By Can't Unsee - 25/08/2018 22:00

Today, my mother found my sex toys. To make me "feel better" she showed me hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 176

You deserved it 575

Ask first, snoop later

By Jenna Berreth - 07/10/2019 16:00

Today, I was trying to find my missing purple pen in the house I share with my boyfriend and his 57 year-old mother. I checked her room just in case, only to open a drawer and be greeted by a dildo. I’m never going to unsee that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 661

You deserved it 3 160

Silent_Harmony 3

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:22

YDI, You really should put those away when you're done.

ohheykiwi 2

Thursday 30 July 2009 21:45

You're lucky. My mom would beat me with it.

Comments

screwedd 0

Monday 3 August 2009 5:54

uhh. i feel like such a retard, but i speak for others as i say this. what the hell is a *****?

cheeter 0

Wednesday 5 August 2009 11:44

Its a fake penis so girls can jerk off without using a guy. Also known as "viberators"

FYOURLIFE13 0

Monday 3 August 2009 9:16

a ***** is a fake penis

dvs01 0

Saturday 29 August 2009 3:12

Why is your life ******? It would be more ****** if your dog got to it.

xoxcinderellaxox 0

Friday 11 September 2009 2:24

lol! this isnt an fml. at least she didnt give you shit about it and was actually concerned enough to tell you not to let the dog get it.

romanalcocer 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 4:51

haha least she was cool with it

Nate_F 0

Tuesday 16 November 2010 18:51

please say your a girl...

lucy331 0

Thursday 4 August 2011 2:23

It shows that she's a girl in the top right corner of the fml

babylioncub 0

Monday 4 April 2011 8:18

Woot for BC people :D

beckyxD 13

Monday 21 November 2011 2:08

Bahahahahahahahahahahahahahaa. That just made my day.

saaracing 2

Tuesday 4 September 2012 16:04

She's probably speaking cause the dog has got her personal collection on previous occasions..

Charity Taylor 17

Tuesday 8 October 2019 18:32

Better than her gifting you one. Just saying.

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Snow Weather Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

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I agree, your life sucks 327 313

You deserved it 33 817

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I agree, your life sucks 1 440

You deserved it 119

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I agree, your life sucks 28 754

You deserved it 38 861

Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend bought me a sword from a TV show called Game of Thrones. He seemed disappointed at my reaction, since he spent so much money on the limited edition version. I've never watched the show, and I also have never had any interest in swords, so I don't know what he was thinking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 232

You deserved it 140

Today, a customer asked me if we serve spaghetti. She then asked for a manager because I was giving her a weird look, laughing softly when telling her yes, and apparently making her feel stupid. My manager wrote me up. I work at the Old Spaghetti Factory. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 228

You deserved it 211

Same thing different taste

Great chat!

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