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Am I the only one who found this inexplicably funny?
no :)
And how does that even compare to her wiping your ass for you when you were a baby?
Well, you were a better choice than your boyfriend. =p Of course, if the pencil was something that you left lying around, you only have yourself to blame.
How dare you post this on FML? (Unless you want your FML to get moderated, just to serve your ego) - That woman screamed in pain and agony to bring you into this world, wiped your ass when you needed wiping, fed you, teached you, and you can't effing just take care of a small cut on her outter butt?...
Don't worry, at least your mother isn't a turtle.
This is fake how would your mother cut herself with a pencil by sitting on it? unless the pencil was pointing straight up and I doubt that happened.
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You're a woman and her child, so perhaps she trusted you. What if someday your mom is 87 years old, and requires you to clean her, feed her, and change her diapers all the while she's unable to even talk? Are you going to post on FML about how your life sucks? Or are you going to behave like a responsible, moral person who takes care of her family rather than find it disgusting and something for all to hear?
She sat on a pencil and it magically made her ass bleed? I have an image of a pencil standing straight up and usually just doesn't happen like that, pal.