Health: Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then...

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then made me clean the wound on her butt and put ointment on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 135

You deserved it 4 928

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/02/2010 00:44 - United States

Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 067

You deserved it 2 805

By ouch - 12/07/2013 07:22 - United States

Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 167

You deserved it 4 761

By Loki16 - 02/06/2016 08:40 - United States - New York

Today, my girlfriend helped me apply liquid bandaid over an open wound. Unfortunately, she grabbed the liquid wart remover instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 523

You deserved it 758

By Prae - 01/10/2012 05:47 - United States - Dallas

Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 687

You deserved it 2 120

By not as scarred as he should be - 18/10/2012 18:19 - Canada - Cambridge

Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 770

You deserved it 3 344

Content warning

By imblue42 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 554

You deserved it 3 785

By need my own place - 24/10/2015 23:24 - United States

Today, while I was cutting myself some watermelon, my mom walked in. I could tell she hadn't taken her medication in a while because she freaked out, grabbed the knife, and burst into tears before yelling at me, saying I could have cut myself and bled out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 942

You deserved it 1 597

Revenge is sweet

By Anonymous - 12/10/2013 22:03 - Iceland - Akranes

Today, my mom was acting really pissy, and I couldn't help but mutter that she must be on her period. Five hours later, I'm glued to the toilet with my phone, because she went all out for revenge and spiked my dinner with some hellishly potent kind of laxative. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 268

You deserved it 27 811

By Anonymous - 05/07/2009 23:20 - Canada

Today, I had to be go to the ER after I fell on a rake. After having stiches put in, my Mom wanted me to go to the store with her. My friend saw me at the store and thought it would be funny to rip off the band aid because she thought I was hiding a zit. She ripped out my stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 623

You deserved it 3 040

By feartheend511 - 19/08/2010 15:48 - United States

Today, while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 163

You deserved it 3 658

NorfolkDude 2

Monday 30 November 2009 10:04

You're a woman and her child, so perhaps she trusted you. What if someday your mom is 87 years old, and requires you to clean her, feed her, and change her diapers all the while she's unable to even talk? Are you going to post on FML about how your life sucks? Or are you going to behave like a responsible, moral person who takes care of her family rather than find it disgusting and something for all to hear?

xApril 0

Monday 30 November 2009 10:04

She sat on a pencil and it magically made her ass bleed? I have an image of a pencil standing straight up and usually just doesn't happen like that, pal.

Comments

CallMeHush 0

Monday 30 November 2009 16:59

Oh the horror, did you have to suck out the poison too? I just hope she didn't have a really hairy ass.

Skull_300 0

Monday 30 November 2009 17:01

Next, Mother's calls me into the kitchen. She "accidently" sat down on a cucumber....

Brave_Sir_Robin 4

Monday 30 November 2009 17:03

If you ever accidentally sit on a cucumber, you need two things and two things quick: a pair of ice tongs and a friend who can keep a secret.

rachelbrianna25 0

Monday 30 November 2009 17:20

is it that big? her butt? i would run and not come back for 24 hrs so she would have it taken care of by then. hahahahaha!

flylikemusic 0

Monday 30 November 2009 18:11

Ungrateful asshole. Your mom changed your diapers. She was in pain and you probably made her feel worse.

jane99 0

Monday 30 November 2009 18:18

How hard is it to clean and bandage a wound the size of a pencil tip?

grinchgirl 0

Monday 30 November 2009 18:18

OMG you selfish little cow. Do you think your Mom WANTED to have to ask you to do that? Maybe she was just as embarrassed as you because she knows what a rotten little brat you are. Oh you poor thing, you had to help your Mom out. Did you think, maybe, since the wound was on her butt, that she couldn't see/reach to clean it out properly and needed HELP. For the record, if it was my Mom I would help her. Would I like it, probably not, would I be a bit embarassed by it, probably, but that's your MOM asshole! Grow the **** up.