Health: Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then...

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then made me clean the wound on her butt and put ointment on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 132

You deserved it 4 928

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/02/2010 00:44 - United States

Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 067

You deserved it 2 805

By ouch - 12/07/2013 07:22 - United States

Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 162

You deserved it 4 761

By Loki16 - 02/06/2016 08:40 - United States - New York

Today, my girlfriend helped me apply liquid bandaid over an open wound. Unfortunately, she grabbed the liquid wart remover instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 521

You deserved it 757

By Prae - 01/10/2012 05:47 - United States - Dallas

Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 683

You deserved it 2 118

By not as scarred as he should be - 18/10/2012 18:19 - Canada - Cambridge

Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 764

You deserved it 3 342

By imblue42 - 24/06/2015 05:16 - United States

Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 245

You deserved it 3 701

By need my own place - 24/10/2015 23:24 - United States

Today, while I was cutting myself some watermelon, my mom walked in. I could tell she hadn't taken her medication in a while because she freaked out, grabbed the knife, and burst into tears before yelling at me, saying I could have cut myself and bled out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 939

You deserved it 1 595

Revenge is sweet

By Anonymous - 12/10/2013 22:03 - Iceland - Akranes

Today, my mom was acting really pissy, and I couldn't help but mutter that she must be on her period. Five hours later, I'm glued to the toilet with my phone, because she went all out for revenge and spiked my dinner with some hellishly potent kind of laxative. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 263

You deserved it 27 806

By Anonymous - 05/07/2009 23:20 - Canada

Today, I had to be go to the ER after I fell on a rake. After having stiches put in, my Mom wanted me to go to the store with her. My friend saw me at the store and thought it would be funny to rip off the band aid because she thought I was hiding a zit. She ripped out my stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 619

You deserved it 3 038

By feartheend511 - 19/08/2010 15:48 - United States

Today, while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 160

You deserved it 3 658

NorfolkDude 2

Monday 30 November 2009 10:04

You're a woman and her child, so perhaps she trusted you. What if someday your mom is 87 years old, and requires you to clean her, feed her, and change her diapers all the while she's unable to even talk? Are you going to post on FML about how your life sucks? Or are you going to behave like a responsible, moral person who takes care of her family rather than find it disgusting and something for all to hear?

xApril 0

Monday 30 November 2009 10:04

She sat on a pencil and it magically made her ass bleed? I have an image of a pencil standing straight up and usually just doesn't happen like that, pal.

Comments

wambamtysam 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 2:11

#83, yeah and then someone would come along and slap them for being "ungrateful, selfish, and whatever". sure that's not the most exciting way to show your mom you're thankful and you love her, but for heavens sake, it was a tiny pencil wound, not a butcher knife gash, like it was really that difficult. op - congratulations on being a whiney spoiled brat.

hollyberry 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 2:12

i know how you feel! my mom once had a tick there. lucky for me she went to my dad for help after a few tries. but i was still scarred afterward

Ace118 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 2:49

Mum: "Today, I sat on a pencil and had to ask my daughter to clean the wound. Despite the fact that I wiped poo from her bumhole countless times, she would not stop complaining. FML"

RuralNinja 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 7:09

YDI for actually doing it. There is no part of anyone's ass that they can't reach with their hands, unless she's morbidly obese and has too many rolls to get her arm around.

Ninjaface 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 7:20

Tell your dad he needs some male enhancement pills. I've heard of a pencil penis before, but when he actually pierces your mom's skin that's where you draw the line.

cmac86 23

Tuesday 1 December 2009 9:31

well she did it for you when you were younger.

the_en4sur 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 13:00

hey alexandraa i call bullshit, pics now!!! lol jk it probably looks like u have a beauty mark on ur tush lol

illy88 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 19:49

for gods sake shes ur mom...she cleaned up ur ass multiple times..get the **** over it..and this isnt an fml..ur stupid

Crusheddd 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 22:21

LMAO!! Comment 55 you watched the family elarning channel reject thing? LMAO!!! I Loved that one! The little popcorn dudes dancing. YAYYY!!!!!! Me aand my BFFFFFFFFFFFFFL Meagnn did this all the time in primary school (We also did the other ones like 'I live in a giant bucket' or 'Imthe queen of evil' we luved them all they were sooo funny) We did this in school one time, little did we know there was a teacher standing right behind us..We got a big talk about 'Being Mature' stupid teachers.....Grrrr.....