By Litterbox - 20/04/2009 02:09 - United States

Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML
I agree, your life sucks 147 260
You deserved it 17 288

Litterbox tells us more.

Wow O_o I can't believe how much of a response this thing is getting(first post ever...) But for clarification:(Skip if you want...Blah) a) Since my mother was willing to beat me with a metal end of a broom for claiming Hitler and the events of the holocaust were wrong and has a machete at the ready underneath her bed, the threat was/is to be taken seriously, wouldn't you think... (Is she still hilarious?) b) Kill me, sure, but THE KID??? c)I would've loved for my mother to have been concerned/open enough with me to have an actual conversation about sex... Blegh -_-

Top comments

anyone else think there should be a "parents" section on here?

Comments

BrokenPsycho 0
hellohellohellno 0

you're not alne. my dad told me he'd MAK ME get an abortion and THEN kick me out and THEN only talk to me when he wanted to remind me I had killed a baby.... then my mom just warned me that daughters are dissappointments. ... I'm an honors student with a pot dealer as a brother, and I'M the disappointment. if it makes you feel any better!

xXxLacrymosa 0

Sad, but true - my mom would probably do the same, unfortunately.

LMFAOO thats sounds like a motherly mother. just think, if u ever do get prego, and have no money for abortion your mom can do that job for you :)

O_o your mother is scary... Threatening to kill a pregnant teen? Okay effective threat that she wouldn't do. Threatening to kill a new born baby? Even if she IS kidding thats borderline psychotic.

Jokermon 0

#198, i knw rite. My Mom was like she'l disown me, kill the guy and take care of the baby, lol, but i knw she won't do it n she knws I won't get pregnant at such age unmarried.