By Litterbox - 20/04/2009 02:09 - United States

Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML
I agree, your life sucks 147 260
You deserved it 17 288

Litterbox tells us more.

Litterbox 0

Wow O_o I can't believe how much of a response this thing is getting(first post ever...) But for clarification:(Skip if you want...Blah) a) Since my mother was willing to beat me with a metal end of a broom for claiming Hitler and the events of the holocaust were wrong and has a machete at the ready underneath her bed, the threat was/is to be taken seriously, wouldn't you think... (Is she still hilarious?) b) Kill me, sure, but THE KID??? c)I would've loved for my mother to have been concerned/open enough with me to have an actual conversation about sex... Blegh -_-

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Top comments

Juli_fml 0

anyone else think there should be a "parents" section on here?

147 4

Comments

saintpat22 0

First: ouch. fml moment. Second: thats hilarious.

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spiritsrose 0

That's a pretty freaky wake-up call from your mom. Better make sure she isn't keeping a gun anywhere in the house.

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1337Steph 0

@ Litterbox Geez, chill the **** out. Most people don't have an actual sex talk with their parents so don't act like a little 2 year old because you didn't. And even though your mom is crazy, I HIGHLY doubt she meant it, but if she did then try moving in with your other relatives. If you don't have anyone else and TRULY fear for you life, tell some authorities, teachers, etc that you wish to not live with your mother anymore, and instead with another guardian/person. But if you're so TOTALLY concerned about your mom killing you and your baby if you ever get knocked up when you're just a TEENAGER (which is a KID), then you deserve it for being a ***** and opening up your legs to get ****** when you're just a kid. And especially when you can't financially support another living being.

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Legz 0

#4 I second that motion.

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somekidfrom93 0

Ahahahah. I love your mom. Every mom needs to be like that. Less tards in the world :D

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LovelyMonkey 0

If I where you... I be afraid... very afraid.

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itssuchanfmlday 0

Sorry, I don't think this is an fml. It'd only be an FML if you actually were pregnant - that would suck!

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Jman1906 2

#7 you deserve to die, I pray you get hit by a car. You would actually kill your own daughter if she got pregnant? You probably won't neglect your children, you will kill them before you get a chance to leave them alone.

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Jeffery5001 0

Arent moms great.My mom told me if I got someone pregnant she would chop off my dick

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