Miscellaneous: Today, my mother told me she wanted me to get an exorcism. Yes,... - FML

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By anonymous - 06/07/2011 15:21 - United States

Today, my mother told me she wanted me to get an exorcism. Yes, she was serious. I'm Jewish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 516

You deserved it 3 716

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Same thing different taste

Possession

By Anonymous - 10/07/2023 18:00

Today, my mom wants me to get an exorcism because piercings, tattoos, my own car, my own career, moving out of her house, and wanting zero contact with her from now on are "sure signs of demonic possession", maybe even the influence of Lucifer himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 895

You deserved it 142

"Tubular Bells" by Mike Oldfield starts playing…

By Sodapop40 - 21/06/2020 05:05

Today, my mom admitted to me that, when I was a baby, my grandmother kidnapped me and took me to the priest to perform an exorcism, because she swore I was the "spawn of Satan." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 128

Tubular Bells starts playing…

By so scared - 08/02/2014 17:13 - Canada - Barrie

Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon, after I'd explained to her how scared I was of The Exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 695

You deserved it 6 206

By Anonymous - 20/03/2016 06:24 - United States - Tucson

Today, my mother straight up admitted that she would murder me if God told her to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 065

You deserved it 1 929

By Colby - 15/11/2013 16:59 - Canada - Saint John

Today, I watched my mother tell a man that the holocaust was "a good thing" and "necessary for population control". That man was my girlfriend's father. Who is Jewish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 620

You deserved it 3 768

By Anonymous - 12/02/2013 23:01 - United States

Today, I got my very first yeast infection. Thinking she would help me, I went to my mom. Instead she began yelling about how I'm lying and it's an STD and I don't believe in the power of Jesus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 933

You deserved it 3 039

By jkbeynon - 03/03/2013 04:18 - United States - Canyon Country

Today, I told my mom that I heard something, and I think we have rats in the attic and should hire an exterminator. She looked at me and said, "Rats, huh? That's what the mom in The Exorcist thought, but it turned out to be the devil living up there." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 813

You deserved it 3 628

By Sigh - 23/05/2009 05:50 - United States

Today, I decided to tell my mother what I thought about religion. I've been raised catholic. I told her I was converting to Wicca, to which she sort of nodded and walked away. I went into my room to study with my earbuds in, music loud. I walked out to see a cross nailed above my door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 997

You deserved it 34 876

By ughh - 22/11/2011 13:22 - United States

Today, my mom read my diary. Then she frantically booked me an appointment with a psychiatrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 117

You deserved it 5 908

Burn the witch!

By fanaticalfuckspawn - 25/08/2014 20:14 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, I told my mom I've been taking yoga lessons, and that it'd be cool if she took some with me. She immediately went on a rant, calling yoga "satanic" and accusing me of trying to get her into "devil worship". Well, that's the last time I try to patch our relationship up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 183

You deserved it 3 168

Next

Top comments

Keyman1212 14

Wednesday 6 July 2011 18:59

Oy Vey!

kidtoronto 5

Wednesday 6 July 2011 19:01

lol ur mom is legit insane

Comments

FarSide 22

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:11

So many "experts" about something they know nothing about. Demon possession does not pick and choose based upon race, sex, marriage, religion, or sexual orientation. It discriminates against no one, or no thing. Including animals. It is not relevant whether you believe demons exist or not. Thumbing it down won't change the fact or truth.

NurseBitch 5

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:14

You are scarring me.

Shadow_Phantom 26

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:32

You left out the part where Demons don't possess people. (They're framed.)

seeunexttuesdays 6

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:11

wow you did Nazi that coming!

GinaFromYorktown 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:13

oh thank god someone else's mom does that too. phew.

NYkid2K8 5

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:15

Let us know how that turns out!

KaylieBieber13 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:21

your mom is ****** UP!!!!

DaddyFatSacks 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:36

Its your fault cause your a jew

MrRayBans 8

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:50

I wonder what she'd say if you were atheist. o.O

raebeglan 7

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:50

I think the point is that in exorcisms they use the power of Crist to get the demon out.( crist being jesus crist) and Jews don't believe in Jesus...

gingerftw 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:52

I am a great exorcist I have done many exorcisms if you would like to take advantage of my exclusive offer please call me at 513-FYL-HAHA or email me at yourlifesucks@gmail.com

fadingaway 17

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:54

Another job for the Winchesters. Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursio infernalis adversarii, omnis legio, omnis congregatio et secta diabolica. Ergo, draco maledicte, ecclesiam tuam securi tibi facias libertate servire, te rogamus, audi nos.

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