Health: Today, my mum accused me of doing heroin because some teaspoons...

By anti-drugs - 21/03/2011 10:57 - United Kingdom

Today, my mum accused me of doing heroin because some teaspoons had gone missing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 275

You deserved it 4 269

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/02/2016 05:14 - Canada - North Battleford

Today, my mother accused me of "cooking cocaine", after she found a slightly discoloured spoon in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 263

You deserved it 1 726

By MyLifeSucks - 15/04/2013 22:11 - United States - Houston

Today, my mother accused me of stealing pills; she looked all over my room and couldn't find them. When she went back to the pantry, she saw them on the shelf below where they were supposed to be. She then accused me of putting them there while she was searching my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 997

You deserved it 2 809

By Anonymous - 22/01/2010 18:33 - Sweden

Today, I found my mom throwing my very expensive and important medication down the toilet. She thought I was doing drugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 492

You deserved it 2 715

By cazorp - 05/01/2012 11:43 - United States

Today, my mom told me she's a drug addict, sold my bed to buy meth, and then lectured me about how I should be okay with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 417

You deserved it 2 464

One-upmanship championship

By Jan - 18/10/2013 06:13 - United States

Today, my mother topped someone's story of their child's problems by saying I'm on drugs. This resulted in people showing up to stage an intervention for me. She made the whole thing up and I've never used drugs, but no one believes me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 769

You deserved it 2 997

By tokinallday - 02/01/2015 19:23 - United States - Kingsport

Today, my mom and step-dad tore my room apart looking for the stash of drugs they thought I had. I've never touched drugs in my life, and I guess they believe me now. Didn't stop them from making me clean up the mess they made, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 369

You deserved it 2 502

By FFS - 06/05/2018 01:30

Today, my mother has taken her drug paranoia to a new level. She threw away an open but nearly full bag of dried mint because she's sure I emptied and refilled the bag with marijuana to hide it from her. She then tried to ground me in my own house in front of my wife and daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 595

You deserved it 352

Stashed

By Anonymous - 13/05/2022 00:01

Today, after my aunt died and left me everything, I found my heroin addict brother searching my house, demanding his share of the money. He thought I had it in cash, so I called the cops. Now our mom is mad at me because a good brother would have given him something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 201

You deserved it 100

By Anonymous - 17/07/2015 22:24 - Canada - Sackville

Today, my crazy drug-addict mother kicked me out of the house after siding with my crazy, drug-addict aunt, who'd just threatened to slit my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 092

You deserved it 2 017

By Theo - 18/12/2009 06:52 - United States

Today, I came home to find my room completely torn apart. My mom and dad start yelling at me asking me why I am doing drugs because she found a tiny baggie on the floor. It was the little bag that spare buttons come in when you buy a dress shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 916

You deserved it 2 231

memo619 0

Monday 21 March 2011 15:57

this is priceless :P my mom accused me of being gay because I accidentally slapped her bf's ass xD

JenL_fml 7

Monday 21 March 2011 15:54

Isn't heroin done through needles? o.O

Comments

midnightfishfigh 4

Monday 21 March 2011 17:42

my mom accused me of doing cocaine because I became healthy and lost weight

sourgirl101 28

Monday 21 March 2011 17:50

Well, if you're not shooting up, where are all the damn spoons? Are you throwing them away after you're done with your pudding cup?

liveaboveit 1

Monday 21 March 2011 18:33

no he's selling them on the blackarket

polysyllabist 3

Monday 21 March 2011 20:11

Ironically, selling them to pay for the drug habit... but not using them for melting purposes

jimbob13 0

Monday 21 March 2011 17:52

woo for heroin :)

slickrasta 1

Monday 21 March 2011 18:17

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAH. Wow. Just wow!

crizzy101 5

Monday 21 March 2011 18:39

were ur eyes red at the time?

khaya 9

Monday 21 March 2011 18:42

Shame on you spoon thief.

SiobahnR 0

Monday 21 March 2011 18:45

but what u didn't answer in this post was whether u were or not

emodude44 0

Monday 21 March 2011 19:04

If I were a heroin addict, I'm wash the spoons and put them back like I always do.

vi3tno_romeo 5

Monday 21 March 2011 19:16

lol...absurd...

FTWonYOURface 0

Monday 21 March 2011 19:31

you know what that means, your mom used to do heroine!

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Sleep Work Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Relatable Animals Dogs Teenagers Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, yet again I had to lie to a date about what I do for a living, because every time I tell someone the truth, that I work in private equity, they have some choice words about "people like me ruining things" and "ruining the housing prices." I feel like an evil James Bond or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 145

You deserved it 515

Today, my best friend and I were playing Call of Duty when he said he had to go to the bathroom. Curious, I checked his phone. A text message read, "Tell your friend you're going to the bathroom and come eat. Pizza is here" from his dad. Apparently, I'm not good enough to feed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 060

You deserved it 8 155

The Top

Today, I put aside my weekend plans to help my aunt with the extermination guy spraying her new house down to prevent cockroaches. After he left, my aunt asked me to go in and turn off the lights because the fumes were very deadly. If I chose not to, she would tell my mom I did nothing all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 957

You deserved it 2 062

Today, I found out a friend of mine likes me. It wasn't by a cute gesture like a sweet little note, or a beautiful heartfelt confession like you might expect. He sprang at my boyfriend and choked him (while I strained to pull him off). Right during the middle of our 60+ student populated class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 599

You deserved it 3 060

Today, I received gorgeous orchids from my long distance boyfriend. I was excited about it and told my parents. They still are convinced I have no boyfriend and I mailed the flowers to myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 912

You deserved it 4 034

Today, I had to give a presentation on ancient civilizations. As a joke, my friend dared me to do the whole thing using puppets, which I thought it would be hilarious. Halfway through, I noticed the look on my professor's face and my classmates giggling. My professor has a phobia of puppets and I was the only one unaware of this fact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 428

You deserved it 157

Today, my ex had a freakout because she found out I have a new girlfriend. She doesn't want me back or anything, she herself has a new boyfriend. Her issue is she just doesn't want to see me happy with someone else. Apparently, I'm supposed to just stop existing now that she's done with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 136

Today, I took my puppy for a walk around town. I had to stop and explain to several people that yes, his head was purple because my little sister wanted to make him look like a Na'vi from Avatar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 266

You deserved it 2 505

Same thing different taste

One-upmanship championship

Stashed

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