Kids: Today, my son and I were on an airplane playing "I Spy" to pass...

By WTF - 22/04/2009 19:46 - United States

Today, my son and I were on an airplane playing "I Spy" to pass the time. The game went back and forth a few times when my son said, "I spy something yellow." After pointing out numerous yellow objects on the plane I gave up. He said, "Daddy! It's your teeth!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 576

You deserved it 19 404

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Same thing different taste

By becstar90 - 05/06/2009 04:21 - United States

Today, I was taking a picture with my friend. Her camera can pick out a certain color and only have that color show up in the picture. She chose yellow because of the yellow on my dress. When she showed me the picture, the sash wasn't the only yellow thing; my teeth showed up, too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 577

You deserved it 18 321

By Anonymous - 24/01/2010 14:25 - United States

Today, after reading a sign at the airport, my 6-year-old son thought it would be funny to yell, "Daddy's got a bomb!" Airport security then tackled me to the ground. Oh, and I missed my flight and my mother's birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 527

You deserved it 3 660

By legitweirdo - 08/01/2013 04:16 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, within the first 15 minutes of a nonstop 8-hour flight, the guy sitting next to me picked an eyelash he found on my face, stared at it for a few seconds, and stuck it in his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 853

You deserved it 2 700

By DENTALITY - 23/05/2015 11:06 - Norway

Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 055

You deserved it 3 668

By brenami - 31/12/2010 06:13 - United States

Today, I took my daughter to the grocery store. The bag boy seemed to be flirting with me and smiling. He had to be half my age. Once in the car I glimpsed myself in the rear view mirror. I had chocolate completely covering one of my front teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 943

You deserved it 7 755

By VDM - 03/06/2013 21:16 - France - Poissy

Today, my 6-year-old son was so angry at me for not buying him overpriced candy at the airport that he told a security guard I had a machine gun in my suitcase. The interrogation was not pleasant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 624

You deserved it 8 236

By Chan - 23/01/2010 03:16 - United States

Today, I was holding my son and smelled poop so I checked his diaper, but there was nothing there. Then I realized it was my breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 112

You deserved it 40 572

By planes - 30/12/2009 06:27 - United States

Today, on the airplane, the kid behind me kicked my seat hundreds of times, while the big bald guy next to me farted deadly ones repeatedly. I was on a non-stop 14-hour flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 006

You deserved it 2 614

By Fffhjno - 28/09/2016 18:15 - United States - Providence

Today, I saw my two-year-old son trying to floss his teeth. He was using an earthworm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 117

You deserved it 1 196

Bottle goes whack

By Plasticface - 14/05/2011 13:32 - United States

Today, there was a 4 year-old boy behind me on my flight. When I looked at him, he screamed playfully and hid. I decided to play tiger with him. While I was grinning like a tiger and trying to scratch him, he smashed a water bottle across my face. I now have a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 110

You deserved it 37 867

weinerdog 2

Thursday 23 April 2009 2:02

I was afraid you were gonna say he was pointing at an Asian person.

KeithHarris 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 1:59

You might need a toothbrush

Comments

DizzyDemon0 9

Thursday 23 April 2009 6:15

Aren't children delightful?!?

noha_fml 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 6:14

lmao me too #19 i was thinking it was the funniest coincidence and i lold at #7

bipolarchipmunk 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 6:19

Clearly, by pointing out the your unpleasantly yellow teeth, this was a sign that the child is trying to protest the incredible amount of pain suffered under your totalitarian rule. He is too afraid to outright voice his distress to your face, and rightfully so; he has suffered too many bruises, too many stinging lashes from the metal portion of your belt, too many nights when he has had to retire with nothing but a pack of Rugrats gummies in his belly. This child is on the verge of complete mental collapse, and you have become so accustomed to abusing his frail little body that you cannot decipher the clues, clues that would appear painfully obvious to a person of a sane mental standing. Shape the **** up, or ima haul your ass off to prison, muhfucka.

lunarlizard88 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 6:45

Dude, you need to get off this site. This is F my life dot com consisting of FML's. Not some stupid story circle time. FML's only! This is NOT an fml. Not anywhere close. If an FML was the moon, then you're about as close to it as some guy standing on a step ladder on earth. It's nothing personal, I'm just really tired of these LAME posts.

Jordie210 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 6:45

lmao #7!

castnerinho 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 6:43

stop smoking. ass hole.

kellster 2

Thursday 23 April 2009 7:18

So, the FML is that your son pointed out that you have yellow teeth? He's just calling it like he sees it, dude! Try whitening/brushing? Whining won't make them any less yellow...