Intimacy: Today, my wife started checking her email on her Blackberry while...

By Anonymous - 19/10/2010 19:18 - United States

Today, my wife started checking her email on her Blackberry while we were having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 046

You deserved it 10 585

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 09/06/2013 05:01 - United States

Today, my wife decided to check her email, while I was still inside her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 310

You deserved it 13 178

Countdown

By unsatisfying - 28/10/2010 05:05 - Australia

Today, my wife checked the time while we were having sex. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 523

You deserved it 15 575

By Anonymous - 06/08/2019 16:00

Today, my wife stopped halfway through a blowjob to check a notification on her phone for a game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 183

You deserved it 396

By Anonymous - 21/12/2010 20:51 - United States

Today, I went and bought my wife a new cell phone for a Christmas present. She called me five minutes later saying she got a notification e-mail thanking her for her purchase. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 886

You deserved it 11 601

By Embarrassed - 11/02/2009 01:46 - United States

Today, I was in the car with a group of my girl friends discussing sexual experiences when I looked down and realized my Blackberry had dialed the family I babysit for and had left a five minute voicemail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 215

You deserved it 17 684

By cockblockedbyFB - 06/06/2015 13:01 - United States - San Antonio

Today, like every other day, my wife doesn't have time for sex because she's too busy on Facebook. Then she bitched me out because "we never have sex anymore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 884

You deserved it 3 122

Planning

By stargate25 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Denver

Today, my wife sent me a Google Calendar reminder for "sex". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 260

You deserved it 11 957

Nailed it

By anon - 21/12/2013 14:13 - United States - Lehigh Acres

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I guess she got bored because she started looking at her nails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 124

You deserved it 12 911

My wife

By Michael D. - 25/08/2012 16:06 - United States - Duluth

Today, while I was at work, my wife sent me a few pictures of her in a new lingerie, to "spice up" my day. She didn't realize that I have iCloud turned on so I can share files with my colleagues. My boss and a dozen other employees received the same pictures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 846

You deserved it 27 117

By blackberrybummer - 25/07/2010 05:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided he would do his job while I did my "job" on top of him. He whips out his Blackberry and completely ignores me to send e-mails to co-workers reminding them about the 10 a.m. meeting scheduled for the next morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 082

You deserved it 5 649

krushr 3

Tuesday 19 October 2010 23:21

Maybe you need to make sex more interesting for her?

airball33 0

Tuesday 19 October 2010 23:22

Stick it in her ass

Comments

zun19a 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 6:38

this is a repeat even with the same phone come on at least change it up a bit

biskitbukit 7

Wednesday 20 October 2010 6:43

"Hey, What The F*ck is This!!?!" is what you should've said.

lordslaya53 14

Wednesday 20 October 2010 6:55

why the **** is your list so epic? born of osiris and all shall perish <3

Autoshot 9

Wednesday 20 October 2010 7:22

Lrn2fuk

iluvmtrench 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 9:00

hahaha ... tjmmd is all i can say

504tilldeath 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 10:49

smack that phone out of her hand then roll her ass over and take her to pound town!

tooLONGforYOU 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 11:05

she was looking at my monster-dong in her inbox.

ObtrusiveDave_fml 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 11:16

Hahahafail!

xxniteskie 1

Wednesday 20 October 2010 12:34

hey lady, you stole my shirt!

queencitystoner 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 13:00

mine too bitch! give it back!! lmao

Keywords

Work Accident Embarrassing Health Relatable LGBTQIA+ Annoying Love AITA Inappropriate Relationship advice My ex Animals Cats Cute Transportation Awkward Cars Friends Dogs Money Scams Kids Miscellaneous Drugs Family Public freakouts Sex Intimacy Cheating

The Top

Today, while I was using the bathroom at work, I heard someone come into the stall next to mine and start talking. Thinking they were on the phone, I stayed quiet… but then they said, “I know it’s you, Jennifer.” My name isn't Jennifer. I had to sit there in silence until they left, pretending to be someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 181

Today, my boyfriend was taking me to dinner to meet his parents. As we pulled into the restaurant valet, I saw a woman in a slutty dress and hooker heels get out of the car ahead of us. I jokingly asked if we had accidentally pulled into a strip club, pointing at the woman. It was his mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 855

You deserved it 62 042

The Top

Today, I was hungover the day of my cousin's wedding and fell asleep in the limo. I woke up to everyone telling me we had arrived, so I got out and started mingling. It took me a minute to realise I didn’t know anyone. Those bastards had dropped me at someone else’s wedding as a prank and drove off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 252

You deserved it 1 100

Today, I flew home to visit my parents. We haven't seen each other in two years, I've gotten a few tattoos done since, and I knew they wouldn't approve, so I bought whole new outfits that covered everything and looked professional. When I got there, the first thing my mom says to me is, "Is that a nose ring!?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 236

You deserved it 2 017

Today, I got diagnosed with Lyme disease. My whole family thought it would be hilarious to call it, "Lame disease." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 558

You deserved it 773

Today, one of my friends got me in trouble when he called our house and asked my parents why they didn't see us at a school conference. My parents were at a meeting elsewhere at the time, so I didn't bother to tell them about it, as we couldn't have gone there to begin with, and it was voluntary. They're mad anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 182

Today, it was brought to my attention that the cute video of my cat snoring like a warthog that I posted to Instagram was on my company’s official Instagram account instead of my personal one. No one noticed until it had been up for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95

You deserved it 433

Today, I bought a desk for my new apartment. After ignoring the warnings on the box saying it should not be carried alone, I made it all the way to my apartment with the desk. I walked in the door and dropped it on my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 887

You deserved it 6 259