Work: Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got...

By keiran123 - 27/06/2013 23:15 - United States - Welsh

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 290

You deserved it 3 332

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Same thing different taste

By not twilight - 05/12/2015 00:47 - United States - Charlotte

Today, it was my first day working at a dog boarding kennel. I got bit... by my coworker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 476

You deserved it 1 645

By Anonymous - 13/06/2015 15:47 - United States - Cabot

Today, I started my new job at a haunted house. I figured I'd change clothes when I got home, since my bloody shirt and zombie makeup were blatantly just an outfit. I barely made it 10 minutes before I was pinned to the ground at gunpoint, cuffed, and needing new underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 261

You deserved it 2 892

By scarred for life - 21/09/2012 10:57 - Canada - Brampton

Today, as a pizza delivery guy, I was forced to see yet another naked 200 pound teenage girl with a serious case of body acne. They're starting to give me nightmares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 193

You deserved it 3 709

Gottem

By Anonymous - 04/05/2014 21:07 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, it's my first day working the graveyard shift at a local hotel. My new boss thought it would be hilarious to sneak up behind me while dressed like the Grim Reaper. I screamed like a little girl and soaked my pants. Apparently he does this to all the new people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 768

You deserved it 6 726

Rightly so

By Anonymous - 23/04/2022 00:00 - United States - Morganville

Today, my friends and I decided to prank the pizza guy. Once he rang the doorbell, I jumped out of the bushes wearing a scary mask and holding a fake dagger. He almost instantly whipped out a Taser and got me right in the collarbone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 2 674

By TheStudentNurse - 18/11/2016 00:07

Today, I got bitten at work. Not by a patient's mouth, but by the false teeth they were holding in their hand as they clamped down on my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 834

You deserved it 609

First day

By notsogoodtrainee - 09/07/2015 17:02 - United States - Fargo

Today, at my first day of work, I was impressing my trainer with my skills by carrying many trays at once. Well, I could until I came around a corner and ran into a customer. With food all over his front, he introduced himself to me as the head manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 640

You deserved it 4 814

By are these people even HUMAN? - 01/08/2013 15:18 - United States - Bristol

Today, a customer pulled a knife on me after I informed him that we'd run out of avocados to put on his pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 061

You deserved it 3 798

By Anonymous - 24/10/2009 00:40 - United States

Today, I was working a haunted house. I have a really good spot where I hide and scare people. This really hot guy was walking up, and I jumped out and screamed. He punched me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 543

You deserved it 7 398

By Anonymous - 29/12/2010 07:03 - United States

Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 722

You deserved it 4 349

theaaxis 27

Friday 28 June 2013 8:50

That really 'sucks'!

mintymandy 11

Friday 28 June 2013 8:53

Bite the little ****** back...

Comments

twinkiefeets 17

Friday 28 June 2013 19:20

Where the **** do you work?!

rety1 13

Friday 28 June 2013 19:39

At least he wasn't dressed like that sparkling twilight ******.. I would've shot myself after that..

ViviMage 38

Friday 28 June 2013 19:58

Workers comp case.

codexide 11

Friday 28 June 2013 20:15

Still a better love story than Twilight.

irishmaiden78 23

Friday 28 June 2013 20:28

I hope you have an updated tetanus shot...

asm9296 3

Friday 28 June 2013 20:37

You hope!

pandaiscrazy 1

Friday 28 June 2013 21:26

Sounds like something straight out of Supernatural.

mrperspire 4

Friday 28 June 2013 21:43

I vant to suck your marinara blood!!

Chaaikacup 9

Friday 28 June 2013 23:47

Perhaps he didn't place the order for the pizza to have the actual pizza.

Sperratic 2

Friday 28 June 2013 23:58

At least you didn't get bit by a guy dressed like Edward Cullen.

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Here's another FML video from our friends at 10secondtraumas.com. Enjoy! Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tre...

I agree, your life sucks 41

You deserved it 39

Today, I was brushing my teeth. As a bent down to spit my mouthful of toothpaste into the sink, my cat decided it would be a good time to stick his head right where I was spitting. I spit a huge glob of toothpaste on his head. He then shook it off all over me and the walls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 635

You deserved it 8 428

The Top

Today, I shaved my vagina for the first time ever. Had sex with my husband and then asked if he liked that. He said, "You've done that before, though". I haven't. We've been married 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 324

You deserved it 1 836

Today, a fly landed on my face. Before I could even react, my brother "helpfully" punched it hard enough to both kill the fly and knock me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 682

You deserved it 4 678

Today, I was in an elevator with my dad and several strangers. When the elevator voice said, "Going down," my dad excitedly said, "Man, I love it when she says that!" loudly enough for everyone to hear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 069

You deserved it 4 690

Today, my boss fired me for being on Facebook at work. He did it via a wall post on Facebook saying, "ur fired." Six of my friends liked this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 055

You deserved it 38 591

Today, my boyfriend and I spent 30 minutes listening to my grandmother telling us that my cat is a medium. My boyfriend is totally convinced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 613

You deserved it 3 412

Today, I woke up with a nasty cough. My mother gave me cough syrup for it. After about 30 minutes, I was dizzy, nauseous, and high as a fucking kite. Turns out the cough syrup reacts badly with my prescription medications, making me even sicker than I already was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 669

You deserved it 1 173

Same thing different taste

Gottem

Rightly so

First day

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