Miscellaneous: Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelt... - FML

By FutureMarine3658 - 08/08/2012 14:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelt my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 438

You deserved it 50 525

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Same thing different taste

Stained

By maddie94 - 27/04/2009 09:14 - Australia

Today, I was in a shopping center when I went to the toilet. I came out, washed my hands and suddenly got a massive itch in my crotch. Without thinking I itched it. I then had to walk around the center with a wet hand print on my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 405

You deserved it 54 566

By Anonymous - 10/03/2010 20:53 - United States

Today, I started biting my nails, before I realized I'd forgotten to wash my hands after taking a massive dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 431

You deserved it 61 488

By Cass - 29/03/2012 02:03 - Australia

Today, I got the feeling that my phone smelt of cigarettes and B.O. I smelt it, realised that it was my hands that smelt, then got confused and thought maybe it was my nose piercing that smelt. I then realised my psychology class was watching me trying to smell my own nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 813

You deserved it 28 759

By Employee - 07/08/2012 19:17 - United States - Lincoln

Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 435

You deserved it 12 612

By anonymous - 21/10/2013 06:53 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I noticed that my sweat smelled like cat food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 300

You deserved it 7 209

By Quin - 31/05/2019 14:00

Today, I was running around the track at school PE with a lot of other students. I noticed a guy who smelled really bad and I thought to myself how disgusting that was and I felt bad for him. Later, I was changing and caught a whiff of my shirt. It wasn't him who was smelly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 637

You deserved it 2 051

Spotted it

By dollabill009 - 06/06/2013 08:49 - United States

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in a while. I was doing upper body workouts and decided to ask a very large muscular man to spot me while I did bench presses. As he stood over me, I saw two beads of sweat roll off his nose. One hit me on the cheek. The other landed in my open mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 287

You deserved it 8 563

By XavierLing - 23/07/2019 06:00

Today, my thigh was itchy, so I went into a bathroom stall to scratch it. I, for some reason, moaned out loud while doing it. After that, the men's bathroom went completely silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 095

You deserved it 780

Foul

By cdubb27 - 11/10/2010 06:00 - United States

Today, while at the gym, I noticed a foul smell while on elliptical machine. I figured it was the little old lady on the machine next to me. It was so bad I had to leave. When I got in my truck, I realized the smell had followed me. It was me. My cat had pissed on my workout clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 122

You deserved it 9 043

Creeped out

By gymgirl - 17/12/2013 23:48 - United States - Grand Prairie

Today, while at the gym, I noticed a creepy-looking guy watching me. When I got up from the equipment, I noticed that he sniffed the seat. I didn't say anything the first time. After he did it the second time, I asked him to stop. He bent down and sniffed it without breaking eye contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 382

You deserved it 3 843

Next

Top comments

Sunako_fml 9

Wednesday 8 August 2012 18:55

That's just disgusting..

Welshite 39

Wednesday 8 August 2012 18:55

What a disgusting habit. You deserve the contempt of your peers.

Comments

KiwiiLemon 5

Wednesday 8 August 2012 21:10

just plain disgusting

smokebluntzz420 1

Wednesday 8 August 2012 21:18

Eww why would you do that?? do you like the smell of ball sweat or something???

outoftown 26

Wednesday 8 August 2012 21:18

OP, if you think these reactions are rough, just wait until boot camp!

bizarre_ftw 21

Wednesday 8 August 2012 21:27

Really? Did no one else notice op said he "smelt" his hand I'm sorry, but super heating one's own hand to extract minerals after scratching their itchy ball-sack sounds not only painful but pointless ^_^ Yup. I'm nit picking that, mainly because no one else that I've seen has yet

pexy_fml 16

Wednesday 8 August 2012 21:27

Look back at them and smile…like a boss

galic33130 2

Wednesday 8 August 2012 22:17

Yes brilliant idea! Then people will think you're a lunatic!

pexy_fml 16

Thursday 9 August 2012 3:28

The damage is already done

conor12 5

Wednesday 8 August 2012 21:29

That's a odd habit and to do it in public ew...

alexlovescandy 3

Wednesday 8 August 2012 22:05

That's just disgusting! GAHH do that on your own time.

PsychedelicBOSS 0

Wednesday 8 August 2012 22:09

Haha. I do the same thing, only been caught while driving though....

ahippienamedrae 10

Wednesday 8 August 2012 22:11

Um, wow, okay. Thanks for sharing that lovely bit of information.

J3NNI3LYNN 9

Wednesday 8 August 2012 22:11

You are disgusting

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Today, I went to get the vaccination my college requires of all students. The nurse looked at my charts and told me there was good and bad news. The good news was that I didn't need the shot. The bad news was I needed four others. Now, both of my arms are swollen enough to make Popeye proud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 491

You deserved it 3 817

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 12 554

You deserved it 60 160

Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML

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You deserved it 2 718

Today, while playing a game of Cards Against Humanity, I had to explain to 3 grown men that there is NOT an actual bone in their dicks. It's mostly vascular tissue that swells and becomes rigid, and a broken dick is when they pop one of the two main vascular tubes, which can cause many severe problems. FML

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Today, I got into a car crash, in my own garage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 531

You deserved it 44 218

Today, while at my friend's house, I noticed her brother had a bit of an accent. I laughingly said "Is it me or does your little brother have an accent?" She stared and replied with "No, he has autism." FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 788

You deserved it 47 395

Today, after getting wrongfully terminated from my job, I was told that I would get my severance pay on this date. Since I was fired due to the new owners being ableist and ageist, I expected that they wouldn't send it, as a final "fuck you" to me. I was right. FML

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You deserved it 174