Miscellaneous: Today, Santa ran over my foot with a Segway. FML

By areyouserial - 05/12/2011 13:21 - United States

Today, Santa ran over my foot with a Segway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 229

You deserved it 3 030

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By moopymoplady - 29/11/2011 00:44 - Canada

Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 279

You deserved it 5 629

By Anonymous - 08/02/2013 21:20 - United States - Woodbridge

Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 194

You deserved it 3 689

By evil Santa - 25/12/2014 03:48 - United States - Solon

Today, I was mugged by a guy in a Santa suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 145

You deserved it 3 215

The Brian Harvey

By Yougotmail - 17/07/2022 06:00

Today, I managed to run over my own foot with my own car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 656

Move, bitch! Get out the way!

By FlatFoot - 05/10/2017 07:00 - United States - New York

Today, my dad ran over my foot with his work truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 944

You deserved it 321

By Anonymous - 18/12/2012 05:15 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I accidentally knocked over a mall Santa on his way to meet some children. I've never had that many hate-filled eyes on me at once. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 872

You deserved it 6 309

By Anonymous - 20/04/2013 01:16 - New Zealand

Today, I was the victim of a drive-by egging by some bastard riding a Segway. He still got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 011

You deserved it 9 275

By Anonymous - 17/07/2013 17:38 - United States - Monroe

Today, an old lady steamrolled over my foot with her wheelchair, then laughed as she slowly rolled away, leaving my toes in ruins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 164

You deserved it 3 847

Steady as she goes

By Slippin' - 17/11/2022 17:00 - United States - Steele

Today, I tried to walk on the sidewalk. Actually, it was so slippery that I had to shimmy across it. Then I shimmied too quickly and fell down. Now everything hurts. Maybe next time I should bring a sled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 626

You deserved it 143

By Anonymous - 22/08/2019 17:00 - United Kingdom - Poole

Today, I managed to break my ankle by running it over with the wheelchair I've used on a daily basis for the last 6 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 631

You deserved it 181

Goddess_Rummy 13

Monday 5 December 2011 19:04

Is it because you have been naughty this year?

boofgall 16

Monday 5 December 2011 19:09

A Segway? Times sure have changed.

Comments

MyPerspective 4

Tuesday 6 December 2011 15:31

So did he give you an extra special gift?

uy_fml 4

Tuesday 6 December 2011 16:32

Hopefully Santa will give you more presents this year to compensate for that. O_o

AlexanderSilver 0

Tuesday 6 December 2011 18:54

You're*

Redd_Hyperion 3

Tuesday 6 December 2011 21:10

I'd rather it be Santa than the big ass Easter Bunny.

lionlvr 9

Wednesday 7 December 2011 0:41

Grandma got run over with a Segway XD

vikkigee 0

Wednesday 7 December 2011 1:44

I guess sleighs are out of dates...

poseidon1 3

Wednesday 7 December 2011 7:30

What do you prefer raindeer?

shanek20 7

Thursday 8 December 2011 5:34

Wats a Segway

rockinsexychick 5

Thursday 8 December 2011 5:36

What is a freaking Segway?!?!?!?!

sklorange 5

Thursday 8 December 2011 21:29

At least your grandma didn't get run over by a reindeer!

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, I really wanted to spend a night of passion with my lover, so I'd arranged to meet him in a very classy hotel, gave him the room number, and waited for him in a super-sexy outfit. There was a knock at the door, so I opened it slowly and enticingly, assuming it was him. It was room service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 406

You deserved it 11 953

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I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 979

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 274

You deserved it 449

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I agree, your life sucks 2 167

You deserved it 134

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I agree, your life sucks 26 249

You deserved it 79 269

Today, I made dozens of cookies just in time for Christmas. When I went to take out the last pan from the oven, I slipped. In a desperate attempt to catch the pan I grabbed it with my bare hand. My hand is striped like a candy cane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 906

You deserved it 903

Today, I was getting ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. I wear shapewear shorts to keep my FUPA and thighs under control, so when I removed those, he recoiled and said, “Fuck that shit, what happened to your body?” He promptly dumped me for “catfishing” him and told me to leave his house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 592

Today, I was standing in the parking lot with my sister, after my aunt's funeral, when my grandma walks up and says to my sister, "You're the one going places in life, I'm proud to have you as a grand daughter." She then looked at me, and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 565

You deserved it 3 853

Same thing different taste

The Brian Harvey

Move, bitch! Get out the way!

Steady as she goes

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