Health: Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls... - FML

By Anonymous - 17/07/2010 06:16 - United States

Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 661

You deserved it 47 211

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Same thing different taste

By muffintop - 11/07/2011 02:34 - Canada

Today, I was standing at airport security. One of the bag inspectors asked me to remove my travel pouch, pointing to the lump under my shirt. I didn't know how to tell him that it was just one of my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 183

You deserved it 13 573

By jennyygrace - 11/07/2009 00:16 - United States

Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 610

You deserved it 41 649

By GothicbunnyxC - 28/01/2012 23:31 - Canada

Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 664

You deserved it 35 458

By thebickster - 06/03/2009 17:58 - United States

Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 572

You deserved it 49 768

By sufia - 29/09/2016 11:14 - Pakistan

Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 350

You deserved it 1 170

TSA

By androgynous - 30/03/2009 17:44 - United States

Today, I was going through airport security. As my bags were being scanned, I was told that I was selected for extra searching. Right as the security guard was about to frisk me, he froze up and asked me, "You're a male, right?" I am, and I used to think that it was obvious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 563

You deserved it 4 755

Never joke with TSA

By missy - 16/06/2011 02:42 - United States

Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 022

You deserved it 10 112

Smugglers unite

By atang - 09/04/2009 09:16 - United States

Today, I was leaving a clothing store when the security guard stopped me and demanded that I surrender the clothing I was "trying to steal" by hiding it under my shirt. It turns out, he was just looking at my pot belly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 939

You deserved it 11 455

How much?

By Anonymous - 21/07/2009 06:06 - United States

Today, I was at the airport to catch a plane. It was very crowded at the gate and there was nowhere to sit except for a flat metal bench, so I sat on that. Turns out I was sitting on a luggage scale, so my weight was displayed for everybody to see. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 292

You deserved it 47 037

By A continent away - 02/09/2014 19:48 - Estonia - Tallinn

Today, the security at the airport were nice enough to remind me to take the laptop out of my bag. I wish they'd also reminded me to put it back in before I left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 977

You deserved it 13 785

Next

Top comments

ArtIsResistance7 1

Saturday 17 July 2010 20:19

Time to do some good ol' fashion exercise... Put your hands up to the ceiling, bend your knees, and touch your toes. Do your daily exercises, you're gonna look like skin and bone. :)

Monado 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 20:20

Were you too big to fit through the metal detector too?

Comments

exquisite 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 4:14

lol smart way for a terrorist to smuggle something on tho... get so fat the 'rolls' conceal it lol!

weege 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 4:44

ew

nobodyxyouxknow 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 5:12

lmao good one

einauglein 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 7:14

This isn't F your life, it's F the life of the people/person sitting next to you.

turtlemanz 8

Sunday 18 July 2010 7:23

no it's more like this today, I had to check under some fat chicks rolls, FML.

kekywobble 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 8:35

that must be sad fyl . and to the rest of u stop being so mean thats y one day someone u talked crap about in ur perfect little lives will shoot up ur job and hopefully u will be killed, slowly and painfully :)

ndizzle 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 8:41

People *do* have physiological issues that result in weight gain (thyroid, genetic metabolism, etc.), as well as other complications (medications, depression, limited budget) that can have the same effect. Not that the OP probably falls into one if these categories, but just because you don't want to hear it doesn't mean it's not the case, or at least a possibility. In short: I don't give a rats ass about what you do or do not want to hear.

ndizzle 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 8:45

"Creepy" really doesn't go far enough. Douchbag is getting closer.

kekywobble 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 8:49

btw who says its a woman?

maywright4u 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 9:00

I work for TSA and yea it's a **** our life..loose weight we hate patting down fat people it smells like sweat and it's extra fat to touch and when you hear us laughing yes it's about you guys!!

SoIcyKoolin 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 10:39

Hahaha daamn thats ****** up! if you that big, you shoulda beat his ass

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The Top

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The Top

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You deserved it 703

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You deserved it 5 776

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You deserved it 5 369

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You deserved it 22 493

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I agree, your life sucks 33 627

You deserved it 4 852