Work: Today, the jackoffs at my new job kept making jokes about my...

By Anonymous - 07/08/2015 17:31 - United States - Newark

Today, the jackoffs at my new job kept making jokes about my prosthetic leg. When I finally lost my shit and told one of them to back off, he said "Woah there, Mr Pistorius!" then said he'll avoid using the restroom now in case I decide to shoot him through the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 052

You deserved it 1 898

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/09/2013 13:23 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I told a guy he should be ashamed of himself for parking in a handicapped space. He hit me with his prosthetic leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 005

You deserved it 96 591

By Simms - 14/03/2012 02:32 - United States

Today, I got back to work at my hospital after some sick leave. The first jackass to waste my time was a guy with leg lacerations. This, he claimed, was because he tried to break a samurai sword over his leg as part of a bet. It's day one and already I want to kill myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 532

You deserved it 6 467

Pranksters

By dan - 09/05/2012 20:10 - United States - Laurel

Today, I started my new job. It seems my colleagues are moronic pranksters, because when I leaned back in my chair, the backrest came apart and I fell to the ground, to much laughter. My boss immediately shouted at me to, "Stop fucking about." I thought this only happened in movies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 183

You deserved it 2 180

Shut up!

By Anonymous - 03/03/2013 18:03 - Germany - Augsburg

Today, I was awkwardly taking a dump at work, when a coworker in another stall started talking shit to me about our boss. I grunted and agreed, hoping he'd shut up and leave me alone. That's when a third guy sarcastically chimed in with insults from a third stall. It was our boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 980

You deserved it 11 230

By 123literateABC - 04/11/2015 03:10 - United States - Grand Haven

Today, at work, the janitor would not stop telling me how good I looked. This was after he told me he was fired for sexual harassment at his last job. He clearly learned that lesson. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 529

You deserved it 1 547

By Faker - 16/10/2012 21:44 - United States

Today, while shopping, an old man came up to me and told me I should be ashamed for walking around fake limping, and that it's horrible to mock people who actually limp from serious injuries. I wasn't faking, I was born without my right leg and I was getting used to my new prosthetic one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 022

You deserved it 1 669

Who sharpens screwdrivers?

By Anonymous - 26/12/2021 14:01

Today, on my building site, I asked one of the guys to pass me a screwdriver. He threw it so hard that when I caught it, it stabbed into the meat of my finger and came clean out the other side. Now all the guys keep joking I got royally screwed. The jokes are worse than the pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 039

You deserved it 116

Oops.

By Anonymous - 18/11/2017 01:30

Today, within 24 hours at my new security job, I accidentally tasered the head of security in the groin, causing him to piss himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 872

You deserved it 1 119

By I already have one, thanks - 09/08/2014 05:59 - Australia - Mosman

Today, at the bank, some poor bastard got brutally dumped in front of everyone, prompting some total spastic behind me to cough and mockingly say "Loser!" The guy thought I'd said it, and started shoving me around and threatening to tear me a new asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 337

You deserved it 3 085

By framed - 02/04/2016 12:30 - United States - Portsmouth

Today, I was chatting with a new guy at work. He cracked a joke about me and I jokingly gave him a light push on the shoulder. Half a second after I touched him, he threw himself back and hit the floor yelling in "pain". Now I'm suspended because of this psycho. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 402

You deserved it 2 424

FlamingJazkinz 15

Saturday 8 August 2015 8:01

Take it off and smack them.

mattzawesome 28

Saturday 8 August 2015 8:03

That's unbelievable, using a tragedy against someone and conflating them with a crime.

Comments

B1ackFr1day 10

Monday 10 August 2015 4:57

the 1293 people that said you deserve this. WTF.

thenielsens 12

Monday 10 August 2015 5:58

There should be a law that would legalize death to people who stoop to that kind of low doucheness! Don't worry karma is a mother

B6LLT 14

Monday 10 August 2015 10:01

invest in an air rifle, that'll shut 'em up next time you're in

ArcheryArtist 20

Monday 10 August 2015 15:53

I can't even believe people like that actually exist. I would have taken my prosthetic let off and beaten him with it

musicfreak1646 14

Monday 10 August 2015 18:00

Wow, what asswipes. How disrespectful. It pisses me off. They shouldn't even be allowed to work there.

boats75 4

Monday 10 August 2015 23:21

Make an HR complaint and be sure to use the words "hostile work environment " and "Americans with Disabilities Act" "Equal Opportunity "

Dine1982 2

Thursday 13 August 2015 16:00

OP gets out of jail on the 21st Aug, remind them of that. Nevermind a**holes get on with your life...

kishmobile444 16

Tuesday 25 August 2015 8:47

Can't you get them into trouble through the company? Harassment of some kind ... or something? this is really low. really shows how low class they are.