Miscellaneous: Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding... - FML

By NewBride - 14/08/2013 17:39 - United States - Lincoln

Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding and everything was going perfectly as planned. That is, until a bird flew over us and left a present right between my boobs. I had to stand at the altar for 30 minutes as bird poop melted in my cleavage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 847

You deserved it 5 595

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Wedding dress

By Anonymous - 24/01/2020 20:00 - Netherlands

Today, I walked down the aisle when a bug flew into my mouth. In a response, I threw up on my beautiful white wedding dress. I had to party and be in the pictures in someones spare pink dress for the rest of the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 245

You deserved it 273

Nervous?

By Anonymous - 28/02/2015 14:16 - Denmark - Nørresundby

Today, I sharted during my wedding vows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 728

You deserved it 5 135

By whatevershit - 13/05/2012 06:28 - United States - Theodore

Today, it was my wedding day. The best part was when we were taking photos and I threw up on my dress. At least the pictures were outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 300

You deserved it 3 015

By Kim422 - 28/06/2010 06:18 - United States

Today, I gave the toast at my sister's wedding which was outside. Before I started, the wind blew up my dress and wouldn't let up. Instead of giving my heartfelt speech, I spent five minutes fighting with my dress as 130 people pointed at my floral-printed underwear and laughed loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 997

You deserved it 4 610

By Oops - 18/11/2018 21:00 - United States

Today, I had diarrhea and shit myself. During my wedding. In my wedding dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 915

You deserved it 253

Check this out

By AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone - 13/12/2012 14:35 - Australia - Newport

Today, I finally got my wedding photos in the mail. As I looked through them, I soon realized that the lace material on my wedding dress was completely see-through in the sunlight, and my bra and panties were visible in every single outdoor photo. I had an outdoor wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 316

You deserved it 9 026

By DutchOven - 04/07/2009 21:07 - United States

Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 397

You deserved it 25 955

By Husband to be....maybe - 09/06/2018 09:00

Today, I found out I was allergic to bees, the hard way, at my wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 420

You deserved it 246

Classy

By 1234 - 11/07/2009 16:41 - Canada

Today, it was my wedding day. I had my butt clenched during the ceremony. I was giving my husband the ring, but dropped it. When I went to retrieve it, I let a huge one rip. My husband yelled, "She likes to eat beans." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 576

You deserved it 10 440

By bride - 27/03/2009 01:38 - United States

Today, I got married wearing a strapless dress. As I walked down the aisle, our wedding photographer stepped out behind me to get a shot of me approaching my husband. Instead of stepping out, though, he stepped on. Stepped on my dress. Pulling it completely down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133 975

You deserved it 10 293

Next

Top comments

Trivision 10

Thursday 15 August 2013 0:11

Well shit.

JustJumped 22

Thursday 15 August 2013 0:13

Surely someone had a tissue

Comments

fantasyworld 37

Tuesday 17 March 2015 1:08

Bird poop is supposed to be good luck.

Keywords

Relatable Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Health Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Love Work Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Medication Teenagers Dogs Animals Video games

The Top

Today, it's been two months since I broke up with my boyfriend. He's been texting me every time he found a bobby pin at his house that belonged to me, saying we should both see it as a sign of us belonging together. If he keeps this up every time he finds one, the texts will probably never stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 096

You deserved it 880

...

I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

The Top

Today, I found out I have bed bugs, thanks to my dad having them and not telling me, so my girlfriend got pissed at me, thinking I purposely give them to her, and is sending me a bill to have her house treated for them. Thanks dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 013

You deserved it 105

Today, I received a compliment for the first time from a girl. She told me she admires my courage to go out in public since most ugly people don't like to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 872

You deserved it 2 027

Today, my parents still won't let me drive in the dark. I'm 30 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 758

You deserved it 512

Today, I realised the project I’ve been tirelessly working on for 6 months is actually going to cost the company $380,000. I thought the negative symbol was a saving, not a loss. I'm a senior analyst for the company, or at least… I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 257

You deserved it 1 249

Today, my Breaking Bad-obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks" during foreplay. My vagina just about turned into a desert on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 351

You deserved it 4 301

Today, I made spaghetti bolognese for three people. Of those three people, only one got food poisoning. Me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 367

You deserved it 1 762