Love, Sex and Intimacy: Today, we were fooling around and I was just about to orgasm... - FML

By notmyday - 25/02/2009 23:26 - United States

Spicy

Today, we were fooling around and I was just about to orgasm when she looked at my clock and said, "I have to go, 'Lost' is on in 20 minutes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 067

You deserved it 8 966

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Same thing different taste

Get on with it

By KaRaSu - 22/11/2008 12:24 - France

Spicy

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, she suddenly said : "Are you going to be done any time soon?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 917

You deserved it 7 113

Escape route

By crap - 26/03/2009 08:37 - Thailand

Spicy

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex. I was on top and really into it but in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said, "Huh, look at the time, I gotta get home." She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 748

You deserved it 17 917

By 0h_Boy - 20/04/2016 20:03 - United States - Brooklyn

Spicy

Today, my wife and I were Skyping, when she decided to put on a "show" for me. Seconds before she was about to climax, we lost internet connection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 911

You deserved it 2 546

By Velian - 09/12/2008 08:59 - France

Today, I began to undress my wife, who was watching TV, and gave her a massage to relax her while she watched her soap. 20 minutes later, when the programme came to an end, she said "I wish you'd let me watch TV in peace!". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 651

You deserved it 4 734

Sex is out the window

By dfhgblsf - 05/04/2009 19:15 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with a girl I had just met. After about five minutes in, she said she had to go to the bathroom, so we stopped and she left the room. After waiting around ten minutes, I decided to check if she was OK. The window was open. She was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 108 680

You deserved it 36 604

Countdown

By unsatisfying - 28/10/2010 05:05 - Australia

Spicy

Today, my wife checked the time while we were having sex. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 524

You deserved it 15 576

Fast and Furious

By Anonymous - 02/03/2020 01:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML

I agree, your life sucks 880

You deserved it 1 782

By Hikara - 13/04/2009 13:44 - Australia

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were watching TV. She starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited, she says to me, "Just joking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 165 574

You deserved it 24 382

By Alex - 31/03/2009 04:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me how I am too occupied with work for our relationship. Before we had sex I told my friend to call me in ten minutes so I can pretend its my boss and I would throw the phone away to impress her. He called me in ten minutes, but I only lasted five. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 755

You deserved it 89 102

Watcha doin'?

By DamnThatsHarsh - 16/10/2009 18:04 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were fooling around on camera. I was mostly naked and putting on a show for her, when I noticed that she was looking off to the side instead of where she normally looks when she's talking to me. She was playing solitaire on her computer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 434

You deserved it 4 357

Next

Top comments

BrandOldDucky 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 4:46

Wow. Step up your sex game bro...

Bauer_fml 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 6:16

Hey, you can't miss an episode of LOST or else you'll be even more confused!

Comments

d00d_c0m3_0n 0

Friday 27 February 2009 1:27

Lmao, I love how almost everyone agrees with her about the show. I don't watch LOST but i LOVE Grey's Anatomy. Favorite TV shows are sometimes just more important than sex.

pcow 0

Friday 27 February 2009 2:43

Really? For a show like Lost?

monabu 0

Friday 27 February 2009 6:46

Sorry man, I would have done the same thing as her.

Jimmy_fml 0

Friday 27 February 2009 7:41

you my friend should introduce her to the world of online tv episodes. It'd save you and her a lot of pleasure.

I_N_F_E_R_N_O 0

Friday 27 February 2009 22:29

she's a keeper.

dragon_fml 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 22:46

hahaaa, I would do the same for Heroes!

hobbitfeet13 0

Monday 2 March 2009 21:09

I feel your pain dude, my girlfriend did the same exact thing to me on the season premier, sitting there after Psych class, foolin around, and then right after i get her off, she looks at the clock and says she has to go.......

perstephane 4

Monday 2 March 2009 21:24

At least you didn't get ditched for an episode of "The Hills" or something equally revolting. Next time suggest you fool around on commercials...

gamerpro2000 0

Monday 2 March 2009 22:32

Wow. I would seriously not put out to a girl anymore if she did that. That was f***ed up. I mean, that would be a serious self esteem crusher. If a guy isn't doing something you like, let him know.

OhNoImRuined 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 0:38

Im with this chick. LOST isnt just a show, its a LIFESTYLE. you can never miss an episode. srry bro!

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I agree, your life sucks 27 300

You deserved it 14 749

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I agree, your life sucks 34 746

You deserved it 3 568

The Top

Today, I had a big party planned. All but one of the guests cancelled. See you at 7, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 190

You deserved it 3 963

Today, I was conducting interviews and I could tell this particular candidate was really nervous, so I was extra nice. At the end, he was reluctant to shake my hand. On the way out I realised why: I had lost the top button on my low cut top, and he was nursing his appreciation of the view. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 677

You deserved it 8 380

Today, I was framed for hacking a Facebook account. I’m a 17 year-old cybersecurity major. Really? FML

I agree, your life sucks 708

You deserved it 129

Today, I’m supposed to be a bridesmaid at my sister's wedding, but she doesn’t want me in the photos because I’m over a foot taller than her and the other bridesmaids, and it will look silly in the photos. I told her I won’t even bother attending, and mom actually took her side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 157

You deserved it 111

Today, in an effort to seduce my husband, I laid in bed caressing myself. He walked in, looked at me, and said, "Is the ground beef in the freezer still good?" When I answered yes, he turned and walked out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 113

You deserved it 6 805

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very Christian family, I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "Is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 295 564

You deserved it 54 149