Intimacy: Today, we were going around the table, telling everyone what...

By notgoodenough - 25/11/2011 17:20 - United States

Today, we were going around the table, telling everyone what we were thankful for. My girlfriend said she was thankful for her vibrator, because I can't please her like it can. My family thought this was funny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 423

You deserved it 9 239

When Christmas Ends Badly…
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/11/2016 13:17 - United States - New York

Today, on Thanksgiving, I asked my kid what she is thankful for. "My tablet." I had just told her I was thankful for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 738

You deserved it 2 277

By ToysforHire - 22/09/2018 03:00

Today, I found out that my girlfriend secretly purchased a vibrator and has been using it for the past two weeks. When I confronted her, her only argument was "It's made me cum more times than you could." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 537

You deserved it 7 842

By AMIGODO - 12/02/2011 15:13 - Netherlands

Today, It was my birthday and my friends came to celebrate it. My parents thought it would be funny to give me a vibrator in front of everybody. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 864

You deserved it 5 119

By Anonymous - 25/12/2012 07:12 - United States

Today, after giving my mother and my girlfriend their Christmas presents, I realized just how similar they looked both in box size and wrapping paper. I noticed after my mother gasped upon finding a vibrator in her box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 868

You deserved it 55 556

By Sarah - 25/08/2009 16:04 - United Kingdom

Today, my mother was cleaning out my underwear drawer and found my vibrator. Everytime I see her in the hall, she just cracks up and makes jokes about how I can't get a guy, so I have to rely on electronics. What's worse, she told my dad AND posted a status on facebook about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 652

You deserved it 10 420

By mylifesucks - 18/04/2009 07:20 - Netherlands

Today, I celebrated my 21st birthday. My boyfriend of almost 3 years gave me a big pink vibrator. Thinking it was a joke I said: "I won't need this as long as I have you!" His reply: "That's what I wanted to talk to you about." FML

I agree, your life sucks 123 377

You deserved it 7 037

By TeeJay - 01/06/2009 14:06 - United States

Today, it was my birthday, and my wife gave me a sex toy for self-masturbation. She even showed me how to properly use it so I can masturbate myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 475

You deserved it 7 481

By Mygawdwhy - 21/01/2018 01:30

Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 187

You deserved it 2 062

Bad sign

By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 01:28 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 858

You deserved it 6 270

Snoozefest

By notsogood - 08/11/2013 20:02 - United States

Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 543

You deserved it 19 408

unixdude 9

Friday 25 November 2011 22:43

...and you are thankful for ****** on Craigslist because you girlfriend is too much of a prude.

kimee21_fml 15

Friday 25 November 2011 22:41

But it is funny!

Comments

magicman1 0

Saturday 26 November 2011 7:56

Lol 69 likes and dislikes

paperdoll14 0

Saturday 26 November 2011 9:15

Don't feel so bad OP it doesn't mean you're THAT bad. I love both my vibe and my boyfriend. He can't neccessarily please me like it does and it can't please me like he does;)

paperdoll14 0

Saturday 26 November 2011 9:28

Sorry just wanted to add there is a time and a place for everything though and your girlfriend could have used more tact if she felt there were serious issues. I think her comment was more hurtful than funny..

blaablaa_fml 5

Saturday 26 November 2011 14:10

If OPs girlfriend really thinks that OP isn't pleasing her, she should have told that to him in private, not in front of his family. Seriously, there are boundaries to shit like that.

spastiksarcastic 9

Saturday 26 November 2011 18:31

Jazz fingers

nikkij1988 0

Saturday 26 November 2011 20:23

Well good fellow, you need to get to work then so next year she will be grateful for you! Lol

GetTheFuckOut 7

Saturday 26 November 2011 21:26

This sounds fake. What kind of girl would openly tell people she has a ******* vibrator? That's plain stupidity.

psychomusica 0

Saturday 26 November 2011 22:06

Dump that girl; it only gets worse - unless you can give her a spanking that she enjoys while she begs you to continue because she loves your punishing her as a bad girl mote than she does her vibrator.

M3gzilla 5

Sunday 27 November 2011 2:00

I found this really funny

ame_franky 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 2:24

she wouldn't say it if it was a real comment. it's a joke and who says she doesn't pay for everything. I pay for my own shit. sexist bastard

xlibra259x 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 8:28

that's not cool.. I do feel bad for you. and besides that is kind of inappropriate for your girlfriend to say something like that, especially in front of your family, wonder what your parents think of her now.