Kids: Today, while at the beach, my son needed to pee. I told him to... - FML

By Anonymous - 28/05/2013 23:01 - United States - El Paso

Today, while at the beach, my son needed to pee. I told him to pee in the ocean. He took off his pants and peed from the beach to the water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 532

You deserved it 48 275

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Same thing different taste

By sayroshi - 30/06/2016 18:29 - United States

Today, my 3-year-old son decided to pull down his pants and pee outside as our local city's parade had just started marching down the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 404

You deserved it 1 334

By heyyoitsapotato - 31/05/2013 02:35 - United States

Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 136

You deserved it 3 300

By Anonymous - 12/07/2013 20:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 640

You deserved it 6 653

Family vacation!

By Ungrateful brat - 06/06/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, at the beach, my son was screaming and crying because the sand was burning his feet. I told him to put on his sandals. He got mad and threw them in the ocean, then started crying harder when he realized they were gone. He's now hiding under the bed in the condo and is refusing to come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 202

Let it all out

By HateCelebz - 26/08/2023 00:02

Today, I went for a swim in the sea. It was early and I was the only one in the water. i swam out far, then my tummy rumbled big time. Next thing I knew, I'd shat my shorts. It went everywhere. I had to scoop the poop out with my hand and wash it off whilst swimming back to shore. I had to shower afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 214

I just can't hide it

By doomeddaddy - 03/08/2011 16:46 - United States

Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 246

You deserved it 3 234

By gameguy3424 - 18/05/2009 03:37 - United States

Today, I went on my afternoon stroll to my local park. As I reached the park a little boy was peeing in the bushes nearby. His mother called. As I walked by, he turned, still peeing, right to me. He ended up peeing on the front of my pants and on my shoes. My house is two miles away from the park. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 621

You deserved it 3 206

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 22:04 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 396

You deserved it 2 299

By jcesom - 01/08/2009 06:35 - United States

Today, my father taught my son to pee on trees outside. We went to the mall later and my son decided to practice what he'd learned on a potted plant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 929

You deserved it 6 115

By Anonymous - 11/02/2010 13:33 - United States

Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 529

You deserved it 7 925

Next

Top comments

WantsHazzasGravy 11

Wednesday 29 May 2013 9:33

YDI for telling him to do it.

Hollandiscrazy 12

Wednesday 29 May 2013 9:37

There are two sorts of people in the world: people who say they pee in the shower and dirty ******* liars. Now pants on, pants off doesn't really matter...

Comments

TonyRuckus 5

Thursday 30 May 2013 12:04

that just shows the respect u have for other ppl using the water! u deserve to be punched in the face for teaching ur children bad habbits

nightmare314 10

Thursday 30 May 2013 21:25

My brother's done that, many times before.

AussieChick101 13

Friday 31 May 2013 7:28

He was just making sure no sharks came :)

fanta_zero 1

Saturday 27 June 2015 8:00

@98 sharks are attracted to both blood and pee

WICKEDxANGEL 13

Monday 3 June 2013 18:40

Next time, just take him to the restroom...Because I'm pretty certain kids and adults swim in the water too XD

sinni800 1

Thursday 11 July 2013 9:11

You're swimming in an ocean. An ocean is full of fish who poop right into it. Don't play disgusted by a little pee... You don't even know what's in the ocean already.

xxreikoxx 31

Monday 13 October 2014 19:08

You deserve it for encouraging him to wreck the ocean even more. -_-

Llamasaur 14

Friday 31 October 2014 3:32

Technically it's okay to pee in the ocean as every single thing in it pees int there as well. Also some things in your pee (I can't remember what they're called) are good for the plants in the sea.

amitilin 11

Friday 19 August 2016 6:29

Well he did do it in the ocean.

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 123

You deserved it 244

Today, as a teacher, I was grading some essays when I yet again came across the word "unalive" when discussing the assassinations of JFK and Abraham Lincoln. As in, "JFK was unalived." I know language inevitably mutates over time, but us teachers don't have demonetization filters. FML

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You deserved it 73

The Top

Today, I got my nipples pierced. Momentarily forgetting about the piercings, I started to lather up with my loofa. Shark week in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 373

You deserved it 5 048

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I agree, your life sucks 4 113

You deserved it 363

Today, I had to suffer through a two-hour long trivia game with my boyfriend's family. As if that wasn't annoying enough, my boyfriend caused the pair of us to lose by just a single point, because he answered "Quebec" to the question of "What is the capital city of France?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 316

You deserved it 7 169

Today, I ate a wonderful meal, after which I fell asleep on my couch and had a dream that my husband was passionately kissing me. I woke up to realize it was actually my cat licking bits of food out of my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 445

You deserved it 4 664

Today, my brother, instead of filming me during my very first musical presentation in New York, took 45 pictures of the sexy trumpeter that was two rows behind me. With MY camera. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 071

You deserved it 425

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I agree, your life sucks 39 138

You deserved it 7 994