Miscellaneous: Today, while eating a Subway sandwich, I was watching a comedian...

By zombielover1 - 13/07/2009 06:17 - United States

Today, while eating a Subway sandwich, I was watching a comedian on TV. As he said his signature line, I laughed hysterically and accidentally snorted a jalapeño into my nose. I spent the next 5 minutes trying to snort out the little piece that got lodged into my nostril. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 173

You deserved it 12 834

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Same thing different taste

By yankesik - 03/01/2016 22:42 - Poland - Kalisz

Today, I sneezed hard while eating some quite spicy potato chips at my friend's house. Some of the chips passed to the nasal cavity, and I ended up having to pick my nose for some pointy, spicy chips shrapnel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 294

You deserved it 1 829

By Anonymous - 28/03/2012 16:25 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, one of my nostrils became completely blocked. At lunch time, I went out to my car to dig into my nose. When I finished, I held up the cornflake sized booger in victory. I noticed too late that my boss was in a car adjacent to me, shooting me a horrified look. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 099

You deserved it 30 145

By Snuffles - 24/04/2019 18:00

Today, while eating a BLT sandwich, I unexpectedly sneezed a lump of bacon up the back of my nose. It has just taken 6 hours of unpleasantness to snort the lump back out. Not how I wanted to spend my day off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 965

You deserved it 242

Performative

By OliviaO - 24/12/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I laughed so hard at a joke that I snorted, which caused me to choke on my Coke, which then caused me to fall off my chair. The joke wasn’t even that funny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 245

By BurnBabyBurn - 22/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Roberta

Today, after stopping to pick up dinner at a fast food joint, I got a nosebleed. I immediately reached into the bag to grab napkins and began stuffing them up my nose, only to find out too late that a mustard packet had burst in the bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 698

You deserved it 625

By DeepTaccer - 30/10/2010 21:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I was sucking on a Tic Tac. Just as I was starting to get into it, the Tic Tac suddenly shot down my throat. After a minute of coughing and gagging, it came back up… out my left nostril. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 113

You deserved it 6 293

By M2thaM - 29/05/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, I was trying to flirt with the guy I like using body language, so I leaned over this counter in a sensual way. I happened to have a fork, so I went to bite the tip that sexy way people do in movies. I accidentally stabbed myself in the lip, cutting it. My lunch had jalapeños in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 603

You deserved it 56 776

What am I doing?

By janesays - 24/02/2010 07:45 - United States

Today, my 2 year-old had a large booger blocking his nose so I pulled it out. I was on the phone and absentmindedly rolling it around between my thumb and pointer finger. I put it in my mouth and crushed it between my teeth for a solid minute before I remembered what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 592

You deserved it 66 559

Clogged

By ISmellBread - 15/12/2023 05:00 - United States - Cabot

Today, I was quickly eating lunch during a work meeting. I ended up inhaling some of my sandwich so I've had toast stuck in my sinuses for the last hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 312

You deserved it 255

By Username - 09/05/2011 17:23 - China

Today, I made a cup of tea at work. Whilst talking to a work mate I took a sip of the tea which I had forgotten was boiling hot and laughed at the same time, causing it to come out of my nose. I have blistered my whole mouth and even burnt my nostrils. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 241

You deserved it 10 551

Fredzter 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:08

HAHAHAHAHA!! That is brilliant!! xD

Vasir 2

Monday 13 July 2009 16:21

This one time i accidently did that to a macoroni and cheese noodle. i sneezed out the noodle. It still had cheese..

Comments

athos1237 4

Monday 13 July 2009 16:42

ROFLMAO! I almost feel sorry for the poor jalapeño stuck up in your nasty nose. LOL!

well_this_sucks 0

Monday 13 July 2009 19:41

bahaha true that x)

trynightday 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:54

This is one of those FMLs where almost everyone has some form of sympathy towards the writer. That must've sucked, man. Funny as ****, though!

regalarius 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:54

That sounds incredibly painful :- FYL

xHaniffax 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:54

peppery scent

iBimmer 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:58

YDI for eating subway.

Nissi 17

Monday 13 July 2009 17:04

Ooh. Ouch. That hurts like a mother-, I know. |: FYL indeed.

Nacirema20 0

Monday 13 July 2009 17:16

lmao. haha. FYL.

tranekfny 0

Monday 13 July 2009 17:36

hows that a fml

fyourlife33 0

Monday 13 July 2009 17:51

the jalapenos at subway are crazy hot too, well at least my subway. so that makes it even worse i bet that was awful

kandk0821 0

Monday 13 July 2009 18:06

here's your sign.

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I agree, your life sucks 488

You deserved it 78

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You deserved it 7 935

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 248

You deserved it 3 536

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I agree, your life sucks 51 387

You deserved it 3 058

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I agree, your life sucks 12 135

You deserved it 48 806

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I agree, your life sucks 1 653

You deserved it 223

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I agree, your life sucks 73 995

You deserved it 7 090

Today, I got fired during my maternity leave for requesting my unpaid wages. FML

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Same thing different taste

Performative

What am I doing?

Clogged

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