Love: Today, while lying in bed with my wife, I asked her if she still...

By yoked - 18/12/2009 03:48 - United States

Today, while lying in bed with my wife, I asked her if she still loved me. Her reply "Sometimes". This I know is true because she instantly rolled over and farted on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 195

You deserved it 4 642

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Same thing different taste

By Big Baby - 28/01/2017 00:00

Today, I was awoken by my wife patting my head and talking in her sleep, asking, "Who is this? Who am I touching?" She then rolled over and farted on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 459

You deserved it 809

By Anonymous - 15/08/2012 00:12 - United States

Today, wanting to be romantic, I came home with flowers, and told my girlfriend I love her and that I never want us to fall apart. Before I could finish my second sentence, she farted, said, "Aww, that's so sweet" and quickly excused herself to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 167

You deserved it 2 912

By Anonymous - 01/04/2011 04:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 733

You deserved it 36 362

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 07:37 - United States

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 787

You deserved it 13 981

By hotboxed - 13/07/2019 18:30

Today, while we were sleeping, my girlfriend and I rolled to opposite sides of the bed. When I woke up, I moved closer and wrapped my arm around her. Her response was to fart in her sleep, resulting in a smell so noxious that I had no choice but to roll back to the other side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 613

You deserved it 394

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 114

You deserved it 41 519

By ThisIsMyLife - 04/06/2017 04:00

Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 565

You deserved it 1 620

Love is…

By gassygirlfriend - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Nampa

Today, I was spooning with my girlfriend. She fell asleep and spent the next 15 minutes farting on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 375

You deserved it 5 277

Don't answer

By Anonymous - 10/11/2014 14:28 - Germany - Berlin

Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 605

You deserved it 5 818

Awwww

By ljjprchf - 13/12/2009 01:29 - Australia

Today, I asked my kids how much they loved me. My seven year-old responded, 'I'll love you forever mummy.' My sixteen year-old responded, 'Can you wind down the window, I just farted.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 218

You deserved it 13 819

CallMeHush 0

Friday 18 December 2009 10:30

She loves you enough to mark you with her scent, that should keep the other women and dangerous predators away from you.

helennaa 0

Friday 18 December 2009 9:34

Oh my goodness. Well, at least she's honest. How do you even respond to something like that?

Comments

xMrAndyTranx 4

Friday 18 December 2009 10:13

OMG. New discovery made. Title "Women Fart, No Longer A Myth"

waterynuggets 0

Friday 18 December 2009 10:17

Courtesy of the Daily mail

NotVeryOriginal 0

Friday 18 December 2009 10:25

nothing like a hot fart to warm you up before bed.

CallMeHush 0

Friday 18 December 2009 10:30

She loves you enough to mark you with her scent, that should keep the other women and dangerous predators away from you.

markee2009 0

Friday 18 December 2009 10:54

i agree with#14 XD

sutianneli 13

Friday 13 April 2012 17:56

U could have just thumbed

nokillnobeepbeep 0

Friday 18 December 2009 11:12

Only if it is wet. Otherwise, she is just warming up the bed. Sheesh, she is just showing her love. EDIT: Lame, this was a reply to #7

anonacs 0

Friday 18 December 2009 12:22

How the **** am I the only one thay sees a problem with a husband asking his wife if she still loves him? If you have to ******* ask.....

Itsnobigdeal 0

Sunday 9 September 2012 4:23

#18 i agree with you.. they are married for a reason.. at least i hope.

arissia 0

Friday 18 December 2009 12:36

My boyfriend asks me that all the time, and my answer is the same.. but its more of a joke to us.

doritoman 0

Friday 18 December 2009 13:03

awwwww...thats so sweet...

Dopeyrox 0

Friday 18 December 2009 13:25

true love

DocsWifey 0

Friday 18 December 2009 13:40

Get over it. She was obviously joking. My husband asks me the same thing and most of the time I say sometimes and he just laughs.

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The Top

Today, after 5 hours of attempting to sleep, I began to finally drift off. Then, some fuckwit who'd parked his car right outside my door took 20 minutes to switch his alarm off. I have to be up in about 4 hours, after a 12-hour night shift, heading into another. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 640

You deserved it 117

Today, I finally got prescribed something for my skin problems. The good news: It works really well. The bad news: When the doctor said one of the potential side effects was a "horrible rash," she really meant it when she said, "horrible." I swear to God, I was about to rip my chest open, due to it itching so hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 688

You deserved it 99

The Top

Today, I made a friend on an online chat. We got along fairly well and even traded Facebook accounts. I found out that the two of us had a lot of very surprising things in common. We were the same age, we were from the same school, and we even had the same boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 449

You deserved it 3 482

Today, I was at my doctor's office. I thought I had a kidney stone. Turns out I'm pregnant and I have a kidney stone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 473

You deserved it 5 404

Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 467

You deserved it 5 522

Today, my girlfriend took off my pants for the first time. She was more impressed by the pattern on my boxers than by my cock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 967

You deserved it 7 323

Today, I started my job as one of those sign spinners. About an hour later, some people drove up, yelled, "Bitch, get off my corner," and threw water balloons at me. My boss made me keep working in the soaking wet outfit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 025

You deserved it 2 630

Today, during the few free minutes I had while rushing between meetings, I grabbed a plain slice of pizza to go. I stepped outside, ready to eat and walk, when a friendly pigeon flew overhead and added a "free topping" to my slice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 752

You deserved it 279

Same thing different taste

Love is…

Don't answer

Awwww

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