Health: Too many to count - FML

Too many to count

By pagvscgrac - 13/03/2012 04:03 - United States

Today, I got a hand cramp from popping zits on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 078

You deserved it 25 358

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Same thing different taste

By blanknameisblank - 09/06/2014 19:36 - United States - Fayetteville

Today, I broke my nose trying to pop a zit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 665

You deserved it 22 111

By Iswearihavegoodhygiene - 04/11/2018 05:00

Today, I popped a zit that had formed around an ingrown hair "down there". It popped with so much force, the pus hit me in the forehead. Still can't get the hair out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 237

You deserved it 271

By Anonymous - 24/08/2019 18:00

Today, I broke my nose trying to pop a really stubborn pimple. By the time I felt the cartilage rip, it was too late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 250

You deserved it 1 113

Getting on a bit

By Anonymous - 01/03/2022 12:00 - Germany - Leer

Today, I’m at that glorious age where I have to pull apart my wrinkles to get at the zits hiding inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 818

You deserved it 107

By Bad at life - 18/10/2018 13:30

Today, I pulled a muscle in my face. Chewing gum. For the second time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 082

You deserved it 621

By Anonymous - 04/07/2015 06:25 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I got hit in the face by a ping-pong ball. It hit me so hard, it burst a big zit on impact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 979

You deserved it 3 239

By CantBlink - 16/07/2012 18:25 - United States - Jersey City

Today, I woke up with a pimple on my eyelid. Not only is it impossible to cover up with makeup, I can't pop it either. Now I'll be spending the rest of the day trying not to blink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 683

You deserved it 2 706

Spotted

By sara - 24/07/2020 23:01

Today, I discovered my first wrinkle at the same time as my millionth zit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 147

You deserved it 170

No pain, no gain

By What's neck't? - 01/11/2022 20:00 - United States

Today, on this edition of me getting pimples in painful or uncomfortable places, I got a huge one on the side of my neck. I never thought that simply turning my head would be such a horrendously painful task. Also, the afflicted area of my neck suddenly itches like crazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 782

You deserved it 110

By clitorasaurus - 21/08/2010 06:09 - Canada

Today, I pulled a muscle in my arm while wiping my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 616

You deserved it 33 001

Next

Top comments

Bullpine 11

Tuesday 13 March 2012 11:58

You really shouldn't do that unless you want scars

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 13 March 2012 12:44

So you must have: A) The worst case of acne in the history of teenagers B) Skin as tough as a rhinoceros C) Very very VERY weak fingers I'm going with C.

Comments

ilikerocks 0

Sunday 18 March 2012 2:03

Well. That's just lovely.

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The Top

Today, I learned that my insecurities regarding my dick size were unfounded, as my girlfriend gushed over my dick and said it was amazing. We then got down to business, and almost immediately heard, "Ow! Fuck, that's my cervix! This hurts! Stop!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 679

You deserved it 1 229

Today, my husband wants a divorce and will be moving out as soon as possible because he can’t stand my mother anymore. He's tired of pushing me to stand up to her, even once, so he's done and is leaving. I’m upset he’s leaving, but I’m equally as upset he’s leaving me alone with my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 120

You deserved it 1 708

The Top

Today, my kitchen is flooded, and according to my landlord, this is normal, because it rained last night. Funny, I thought the purpose of a roof was to stop water from getting in. Guess I was wrong. Silly me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 413

You deserved it 3 826

Today, I announced my third pregnancy to my parents, thinking they’d be excited. Instead, they gave me 30 days to find a new place, saying they refuse to raise “any more of your children.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 2 717

Today, a group of girl-scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought 2 bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 042

You deserved it 6 953

Today, at 4:00 a.m., I woke up and realized that I had thrown an expensive gift certificate for a friend in the garbage. Since it was garbage day, I ran out in the rain in my pajamas and rifled through all three bags of garbage. Twice. I found the gift certificate. It was in my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 377

You deserved it 58 995

Today, I was caught skinny dipping by the police. With the arresting officer's daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 038

You deserved it 12 756

Today, I got a concussion and several staples in my head. As it turns out, watering flowers is much more dangerous than it might sound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 270

You deserved it 7 659