Birthday, Break-ups and Love: Treat yourself

Treat yourself

By birthday bash - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. She decided that her "gift to herself" would be to leave the loser who has been holding her back for two years. Hello, my name is Ben, and I'm that loser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 211

You deserved it 5 241

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Secret

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 053

You deserved it 2 887

Sketchy

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Austria

Today, I discovered that my ex-girlfriend, who I dated for 6 years, is getting engaged to my friend. The very same "friend" who's been encouraging me to break up with her for the past year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 595

You deserved it 3 193

Sounds promising

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend of two years expressing my feelings for her. She responded with, "I'm going to bed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 771

You deserved it 3 236

Friends

By justfriends - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. It's OK, though, she says we can still go on the vacation I planned next month for our 3 year anniversary, just "as friends." The tickets are non-refundable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 337

You deserved it 2 604

Been there, done that

By hlewrn - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Centreville

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend for another girl. This other girl helped me break up with her so we could date. After it was all done, she promptly rejected me and in front of everyone, saying how much of a douche I was for leaving my girlfriend for another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 116

You deserved it 34 854

So creepy

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to mine. I'm getting married in a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 447

You deserved it 3 862

Insult to injury

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years left me for a guy whose favorite color is camouflage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 232

You deserved it 5 916

We were on a break!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, my ex of 5 years got engaged after 5 months of us "taking a break." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 602

You deserved it 458

By grrrr - 12/02/2011 19:00 - United States

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. Feeling bad, I texted him a few hours later apologizing. He said it was fine and that he went ahead and picked up a girl from the mall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 137

You deserved it 48 223

Scary!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, all because he's scared of my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 225

You deserved it 5 883

fullyhalfempty 0

Monday 4 January 2010 9:10

You're a winner to me, Ben.

carlablob 0

Friday 17 June 2011 7:25

wat

Comments

Rubylilly 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 1:03

is your last name sebastian???????

Rubylilly 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 1:04

because i know a guy named ben sebastian at my school

small_town_girl 0

Sunday 21 March 2010 23:38

that really sucks I feel bad for you

Fraud_era 0

Wednesday 26 May 2010 23:04

Funny, I know a ben who might as well have posted this himself

cinnomonroll 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 5:27

sorry. :(

Zodaicz 4

Tuesday 8 March 2011 19:30

I'm sorr Ben, but she was probably holding you back ;)

Zodaicz 4

Tuesday 8 March 2011 19:30

I'm sorr Ben, but she was probably holding you back ;)

ArielTheMermaid 17

Wednesday 6 April 2011 23:44

hi ben

toasty97 3

Wednesday 27 April 2011 4:13

hi Ben 

BarbieGirl1671 0

Wednesday 29 June 2011 3:12

Why, Hello Ben. How's it hangin'?

Keywords

Health Gross Healthy Lifestyle Poopoo peepee Christmas Work Ironic Video games Holidays Gamers AITA Love Embarrassing Public freakouts Am I overreacting? Gifts Racism Miscellaneous Family Toxic Drunk Friends Coworkers Furniture Parents Intimacy Sex Relatable Lonely Money

The Top

Today, my girlfriend threatened to leave me unless we get married within a year and have a baby. I don’t negotiate with terrorists but now I’m gonna be single and alone over Christmas, unless I wheedle myself into my brother's Christmas, but I think I’d just ruin it for his family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 454

You deserved it 157

Today, my old boss is such an arsehole that not only did he fire me last week, he completely forgot about firing me and when he saw me in the shop as a customer, he yelled at me for being late and out of uniform. I swear his mother didn’t birth him, she shat him out the other hole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 86

The Top

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, sitting in my car, an hour into a four-hour trip. The reason? I haven't been lifting with him at his gym during the COVID-19 pandemic. The kicker? We were headed back after a stay-cation with his mom, because yesterday was my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 873

You deserved it 117

Today, on my way for a vacation, my car started misfiring, so I called a tow truck. Forty minutes later, the tow truck arrived. He then said that he had just gotten another priority call, so he was leaving, and someone would be back in another hour to get us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 544

You deserved it 183

Today, while taking a shower, I was enthusiastically singing one of my favorite songs. When I got out, I noticed a bunch of things missing, and a note on my desk saying "shut the f*ck up, you suck." I was robbed and judged by a thief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 092

You deserved it 4 302

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had promised that the day would belong to me. But no, I had to drive 80km forth and back to pick him up from work, then he took pictures with his new camera lens, then he decided what to eat, demanded a massage, and then he just fell asleep. Happy birthday to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 179

You deserved it 293

Today, I took a massive dump at work and clogged the industrial toilet. Since I used the unisex one at the end of the hall, I watched my super hot coworker walk in after me. And then she ran out immediately. Everyone had seen me walk out before her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 535

You deserved it 36 948

Today, I looked at my father's Facebook for the first time in a month to see a status saying, "Making wedding plans!" Really? When was he planning on telling his own daughter? FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 902

You deserved it 3 061

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Comments