Health, Painful and Intimacy: Up it goes

Up it goes

By 0stvn0 - 16/03/2012 01:18 - Canada

Today, my doctor booked me in for an STI test. I was feeling confident until he explained it will involve having a catheter inserted into my piss pipe. He shook his head sadly and said, "Gonna be honest Steve, the pain's beyond belief." Great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 758

You deserved it 5 691

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/12/2011 14:25 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's thinking I had a UTI. Turns out I have an STD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 186

You deserved it 40 098

Ouch

By Anonymous - 01/04/2018 05:00

Today, I went in for an STD test. The Q-tip broke off in my urethra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 540

You deserved it 437

Just in case

By Anonymous - 16/02/2016 07:39 - Australia - Balwyn North

Today, during an unrelated appointment with my GP, he offered me a free check for chlamydia. Despite me reassuring him that I was STI free, he insisted that I should undergo the test. I ended up agreeing, only because I was too embarrassed to admit that I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 392

You deserved it 5 160

Testing testing, one two one two

By regretter - 01/03/2011 01:07

Today, I paid €100 to have a tube shoved down my genitals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 986

You deserved it 7 779

Fingered

By Anonymous - 03/07/2023 19:00 - Finland - Tampere

Today, I went to see a doctor because of some blood in my stool. Not only is the matter embarrassing enough as is, it turned out the doctor was a young, crisply dressed, extremely handsome man. I then had his finger in my ass for a check-up, all the while him being very nice about it. I'm still mortified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 907

You deserved it 215

Tough

By prostate - 08/06/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, I got prostate examination for the first time. Now I can't decide what's worse, the fact that I got a boner when the doctor inserted his finger, or the fact that my wife told the story to pretty much everybody we know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 408

You deserved it 7 057

Prostate implies an Antistate

By artsmart1 - 06/03/2010 00:40 - United States

Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 411

You deserved it 2 947

J'ACCUSE!

By hurtswhenipee3 - 11/01/2023 16:00

Today, I got a urinary tract infection. I didn’t realize men could get those. Worse yet, my girlfriend thinks it’s an STI because, “IF I’M NOT FUCKING YOU, SOMEONE MUST BE!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 107

You deserved it 212

By Jesse - 10/05/2012 21:22 - United States - Bothell

Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 066

You deserved it 2 419

By la poisse - 19/11/2008 05:59 - France

Today, I spent the night in hospital. As soon as I was alone, I writhed and twisted in all directions in my attempts to pee in a bottle left precisely for that purpose. It was at that moment that the doctor, a good-looking guy, came in. My legs were spread wide and I was right in the middle of doing my business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 032

You deserved it 3 513

YourBuddyElmo 5

Friday 16 March 2012 5:40

On the bright side....nope, nothing's coming to me.

glittercookies 12

Friday 16 March 2012 5:41

It's worth it. You're being responsible and safe.

Comments

oz_jared 3

Wednesday 21 March 2012 12:11

Blood test and u pee in to a cup is how u get tested in Australia

someguy998 8

Thursday 22 March 2012 6:00

id rather die of aids.

ItsBreezyOutside 3

Thursday 22 March 2012 23:13

Condoms don't hurt... And the safety is "beyond belief"

thelightforest 4

Friday 23 March 2012 9:49

Don't have a kid then. It's not like you have too. Dumb ass.

HopeLoveMusic 0

Monday 2 April 2012 3:35

He can't just swab you mouth or take some blood?

mrphychrs 5

Friday 13 April 2012 9:55

been there buddy, and he's not kidding, never in your life will you feel more helpless than when a grown man is shoving a qtip type thing into your piss pipe. shit hurts bad

mrphychrs 5

Friday 13 April 2012 10:00

and for all Yall saying they haven't heard of that, its because its the cheapest way to get tested for the clap an gohnnereah(pretty sure I butchered the spelling) and its the only one some insurance will cover since its the cheap one