Health: We are the 99% - FML

We are the 99%

By blahdyblahblah33 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was rushed to the emergency room. Apparently, there is only one serious side effect of getting your tonsils out when you're an adult, which is only seen in about 1% of patients: bleeding of the throat. It can be deadly. I'm part of that 1%. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 920

You deserved it 2 771

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/11/2015 04:54

Today, after having my tonsils removed, I coughed so hard in my sleep that I woke up spitting blood. Turned out I'd ripped my throat. They had to put me to sleep and cauterize the damaged area. Now I'm in even worse pain than before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 509

You deserved it 1 553

By Anonymous - 11/03/2010 22:23 - United States

Today, I became that small percent of people who face three different kinds of complications after their wisdom teeth are removed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 076

You deserved it 2 179

By LeoCor - 27/08/2018 20:30

Today, and for the past 2 weeks, I've had a massive pain in my throat. It went down for a while with antibiotics, but when it came back I had to go to the hospital for an emergency surgery. There was a 3 cm abscess growing in my throat. Happy birthday to me! FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 110

You deserved it 125

By Medfail - 20/06/2016 07:13 - United Kingdom - Bath

Today, at the age of 27, I learnt that your tonsils aren't the dangly bit at the back of your throat. I work in healthcare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 661

You deserved it 13 713

Inconvenienced

By Anonymous - 06/05/2022 20:00 - United States - Dover

Today, I got a nosebleed. For 7 hours. I ended up in the ER. FML

I agree, your life sucks 817

You deserved it 86

Pills, thrills and bellyaches

By Anonymous - 24/09/2019 20:00

Today, I came home from surgery to remove my tonsils. It's a much better surgery to have as a kid, because when you get older it's much more painful. I didn't know my mom liked pain killers. I do now, because I have none left and I haven't even taken any yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 009

You deserved it 101

By Merlin - 17/04/2012 17:37 - United States - Fairfield

Today, I got a one-inch fish bone stuck in my throat. I went to the doctor, who claimed he couldn't see the long white thing embedded next to my tonsil. He charged me $70, and told me to eat some bread. I had to pull it out myself with a pair of tweezers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 675

You deserved it 2 358

Blockade

By I've got skills - 26/11/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, since I've been enduring a sore throat, I got Chloraseptic lozenges to finally get a bit of relief. When I put one in my mouth, I nearly choked on it. Imagine that: trying to soothe your throat, and you almost die by accidentally obstructing it instead. The irony almost hurts even more than my throat does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 337

You deserved it 137

Very much "hands off" parents

By Anonymous - 03/10/2023 08:00

Today, my son had an excessive nosebleed, like I did when I was little. I called my parents to ask what the name of the surgery was that I had to stop the bleeding. They don’t know because they don’t remember me needing surgery for that, OR when I had my tonsils and adenoids removed. They remember my brother’s though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 647

You deserved it 109

Snap, crackle, and pop

By Anonymous - 30/09/2023 22:00

Today, I woke up from my wisdom tooth surgery… while they were still sawing my jaw. I had such a bad panic response that they also cut my lip, so I have stitches inside and outside of my mouth, as well as the haunting crackle of bone being removed from my skull stuck in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 770

You deserved it 111

Next

Top comments

block1 2

Sunday 3 July 2011 9:13

I'm part of that 99%

Ashleywright32 0

Sunday 3 July 2011 9:12

I faced the same issue..... In the hospital for two and a half weeks! Good luck hope ya get to feelin better soon.....

Comments

flemingo 0

Monday 4 July 2011 8:50

no shit. mine also. I am from louisiana . wonder if it's the Dr.'s there . . .

TheBigFailer 0

Monday 4 July 2011 9:49

no bj's for awhile

mercedesbenz96 0

Monday 4 July 2011 10:59

cuz ur part of the 1% that means ur awsum

smashliee 0

Monday 4 July 2011 13:11

you're one in a million. :)

kibbs20 0

Monday 4 July 2011 13:21

what is your first name

smileyxo4 5

Monday 4 July 2011 15:52

So I guess you made it out alive?

smileyxo4 5

Monday 4 July 2011 15:55

So I guess you made it out alive?

glitterypink 0

Monday 4 July 2011 20:41

same thing happened to me. I hope you're feeling better

Blackxhawk 0

Monday 4 July 2011 23:31

call me before the funeral

DaTexasBoy 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 1:10

I was part of that 1% too. It sucks, deal with it.

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The Top

Today, some idiot kid teased and taunted me for weeping on my "already bad performance", recording it on his phone threatening to put it on social media. I was singing and playing the guitar, in front of my childhood sweetheart, and supposedly soon-to-be wife's grave. It was our song. I do this every year on this day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 541

You deserved it 108

Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. because my throat was swelling up. I called 911 and they determined that I would live, so I took two Benadryl and slept all day. Then I went to urgent care for my scheduled appointment time and tested positive for Covid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 859

You deserved it 215

The Top

Today, my girlfriend and I made love. She stared at her One Direction poster the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 343

You deserved it 12 687

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 748

You deserved it 84 095

Today, I was practicing for a choir concert that I have next week. My mom walked into my room and listened to me for a little while. After I finished the last song, she smiled, patted me on the head and said, "It's okay honey, I can't sing either." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 930

You deserved it 2 982

Today, and for the first time in my life, I was unable to trust a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 732

You deserved it 226

Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 684

You deserved it 6 398

Today, I almost got lucky with a girl from my course. We've been flirting since we met. After removing her top and moving downwards with my tongue, whilst moaning my name she decided to mention she has a boyfriend and that we needed to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 858

You deserved it 6 267