Where on Earth do you work?

By Anonymous - 26/08/2012 23:39 - Canada - Mississauga

Spicy
Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 397
You deserved it 4 294
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Top comments

alicette_fml 12

I feel bad for the guy that got caught doing it xD

217 6

Comments

spaboolly 26

I guess they don't want their employees dicking around. Now get back to work!

53 2
alexa9510 1

You would think that would warrant a firing

25 0
zandalee 19

They probably enjoyed the free entertainment by watching sneeky video footage of the employees for the last few years, then it just got old...

22 0
perdix 29

You're probably mad that you didn't choke the chicken more often while it still was allowed! Now, any work area without a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign can be considered a desk-wank-friendly zone.

40 7
Dracoboxer357 35

21- Considering what no smoking signs look like with, I'm thinking what That sign would appear as, especially if you wanted to include both genders in this rule.... A chicken being throttled with a slash through it? A squirting penis with the slash? A stick man with his hands in his pants and a stupid little grin slashed out? Megan Fox in a thought bubble slashed out? ;P Too many options, none quite good enough.....

23 4
RedPillSucks 31

OP works for PETA and the sign is actually a picture of someone choking a chicken, with the circle and slash.

11 0
vocaloidtiger 12

41 ~ Or the sign could just say plain and clear: "NO MASTURBATING AT YOUR DESK". But, okay. Whatever works for you.

2 2
perdix 29

So, how are you supposed to be able to handle the work load?

24 6
DCvRkey2012 7

I dont know, but the work load is too much for me to handle today.

4 0
PamChopsWithMint 5

Or someone figured you were doing it and they didn't want to single you out..

13 2
curlyfry33 8

Fact: One in every six men have masturbated and not washed their hands before shaking your hand.

20 2
celine21_fml 0

Ok what I don't understand is, why are people saying you deserved it?? Why is there even that stupid button??

5 17
perdix 29

Read the story carefully. The operative word is "usually." This implies that the OP at least occasionally masturbates at his desk. Hence, the YDI option being valid and not "stupid."

20 3
GVirdi 11

27 I just had to point out on your profile it's supposed to be "their spelling" not "there spelling"

29 0
mmorgan9218 5

oh and you put 'to' when it's supposed to say 'too'

25 0
blubberfish 10

It's also supposed to be stories, not story's. Just putting that out there

25 0
gmc_blossom 21

I'd like to add that "anyway" should be one word.

16 0
shoopd 19

And a comma after "in other words".

16 0
laden_swallow09 34

33- No, the "usually" used here implies that he doesn't spank it at his desk at all and saves it for more appropriate places like his own home bathroom and the like, but it's apparently the norm for his coworkers to do so at their desks.

3 6
bunny911 16

Don't even get me started on the lack of punctuation and the run-on sentences.

5 0
MyV6Thunderbird 1

Where in the user agreement to fml does it say anything about using proper grammar when commenting?

2 9
Sirin_fml 46

It's between the lines that say, "Remember to shower every day." and "Look both ways before crossing the road."

0 0
MyV6Thunderbird 1

I do neither

2 5
MyV6Thunderbird 1

So... It doesn't, is what your saying right?

0 2
CoffeeChickBlows 13

HAHA, illiterate people these days. : D

4 0
vocaloidtiger 12

51 ~ Aren't you the person who criticized me for correcting someone's grammar on another comment? ... Hypocrites ...

5 0
gmc_blossom 21

143- I'm not going to try and defend myself by denying it. I probably did. I think I remember, actually. It was an error that was so minor that even I wouldn't have felt the urge to correct it, if I remember correctly. I wasn't trying to be a hypocrite. I just honestly felt that correcting the person was unnecessary at that moment.

1 1
wildsweetchild 19

So...why are you disappointed? Your faith in humanity just have been shaken or you wish you've done it too before the sign was put up? If it had nothing to do with you, it had nothing to do with you...it's their FML, not yours...

2 11