Intimacy: Today, my manager sent me a text message with a picture of Santa...

By lonewolf2701 - 22/11/2009 09:15 - United States

Today, my manager sent me a text message with a picture of Santa masturbating, with a message that said he wished me a white Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 564

You deserved it 4 278

New Year, New Blunders
Celebrate the New Year with stories of resolutions broken in less than 24 hours and memorable New Year's Eves... for all the wrong reasons! More…

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Same thing different taste

By CalebNotShomo - 25/12/2014 15:25 - United States - Houston

Today, my boss sent me a text message saying, "You're fired. Merry Christmas!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 375

You deserved it 2 829

By pops up - 01/12/2011 22:25 - United States

Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 379

You deserved it 10 650

By moopymoplady - 29/11/2011 00:44 - Canada

Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 279

You deserved it 5 629

By Marou - 25/12/2008 01:54 - France

Today, I sent a text message to a guy I like, saying, "Dear Santa, I want to fall in love." He replied: "Wait for next Christmas..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 348

You deserved it 11 116

By Anonymous - 20/12/2013 14:27 - South Africa - Cape Town

Today, my boss decided that a mug and a public 'thank you' were a sufficient substitute for a Christmas bonus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 469

You deserved it 3 887

By bakergirl - 16/11/2009 10:40 - Australia

Today, my boss made me wear reindeer antlers to promote the Christmas spirit. There are still 5 weeks till Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 052

You deserved it 3 983

By homerr123 - 23/12/2013 17:35 - India - Mumbai

Today, my manager rejected my leave application for Christmas. Later I found out that I'm going to be the only employee working at the office during Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 967

You deserved it 3 236

By embarrassedhubby - 18/09/2010 03:48 - Canada

Today, when I came home from work, I saw my wife in nothing but black boots and a Santa hat. My boss and coworker were with me. I now have guys wanting to have a threesome with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 538

You deserved it 6 422

By B - 18/12/2009 16:19 - United States

Today, I got a Christmas present from my boss. It was an ab workout video. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 351

You deserved it 4 658

By HOe HOe HOe - 02/11/2011 02:36 - United States

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 093

You deserved it 16 272

stupiddumbblonde 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:26

hahahahahaha. come on people, get a sense of Humor. :) not an FML!!

lsfry 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:21

sexual harassment anyone?

Comments

123e3 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:19

FIRST! And ew

sexyscooter 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 6:59

thats HILARIOUS!!

lsfry 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:21

sexual harassment anyone?

My2864 1

Tuesday 1 June 2010 22:34

awww **** off thats no sexual harresment... thats epic its called a joke get over yourself

xiShawnx 0

Tuesday 13 July 2010 14:50

Win

cayytee 0

Thursday 3 May 2012 22:34

sounds like op is just trying to make a joke so we all think he/she is funny. posting for attention

TheCowCollector 2

Sunday 1 December 2013 18:11

Get a ******* sense of humor!

stupiddumbblonde 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:26

hahahahahaha. come on people, get a sense of Humor. :) not an FML!!

666Broghan666 0

Monday 10 May 2010 8:22

AGREED. :3

hollyman 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 22:17

ikr!!!

ibanez330 2

Tuesday 3 January 2012 0:25

I couldnt agree more!

elgordito_fml 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:28

hahaha that sucks

Laxloverr24 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:29

hahaha ydi for no having a sense of humor! you can just delete the picture. not a big deal.

Laxer21 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 4:11

yeah. just a joke

YellowKettleBell 31

Friday 4 April 2014 2:38

still gross.

Super_Vegetto 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:32

G5guy 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:34

so what? delete it and move on.

604 11

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:36

LOL

clarke1986 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:37

how come my comments never show up... testing...1...2...3...

Rico5037 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:42

Oh no fyl because your boss has a sense of humor..

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Christmas Work Cute Am I overreacting? Holidays Cats Gifts Awkward Shopping Hair Friends Health Relatable Poopoo peepee Money Education Animals Gross Cops Sex Intimacy Neighbours Love Smells Painful First Dates Social Media Grieving

The Top

Today, at work I accidentally shut down a computer that does the essential routine jobs and hasn’t been turned off in 11 years. When it turned on again all the updates we’ve been ignoring decided to run at the same time. The run time is currently 4 hours and our whole office is in a shambles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 236

You deserved it 488

Today, I had to go tree shopping with my dad and some of his work buddies. It hit its lowest point when one loudly told us about a crap handjob he got recently. "I mean yeah, choke the cock," he said, "but don't choke it to DEATH, nam'sayin'?" I'd never wanted to just drop dead more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 976

You deserved it 3 568

The Top

Today, at my job working retail, I had just finished cleaning and straightening a whole aisle. This kid watched me do the whole thing. When I was done, he stuck his arm out, and ran it down the whole shelf, knocking everything off it. His mother just grabbed his hand and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 986

You deserved it 1 867

Today, I wore my new Brazilian thong bikini to the pool for the first time. I was lying face down feeling so sexy, until flies started buzzing my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 290

You deserved it 37 955

Today, after my husband trusted me to sort out the arrangements for modifying our kitchen and I spent a lot of time finding the perfect top-quality items, they were delivered 1,291 miles away in a town I’ve never heard of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 849

You deserved it 559

Today, I was driving when I saw a spider hanging from the ceiling of my car. I'm terrified of spiders, so I was watching it instead the road. When I looked back at the road, I had just enough time to swerve to miss the fire hydrant but not the tree. Even the cops laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 111

You deserved it 32 243

Today, I tried to step out of my comfort zone and go out with a guy who’s not my usual type. He spent the whole date griping and complaining about how women never go for “nice guys” like him. When I pointed out we were currently on a date, he said, “I mean hot girls.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 654

You deserved it 101

Today, while babysitting, I made the kids and myself peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. When their parents came home, their dad took out the same container of peanut butter I had used and let their dog lick out of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 466

You deserved it 2 012

Same thing different taste

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