Hey OP here. I hadn't been up all that long and our dog started barking at something so I went to check it out. I open the door and there she is cutting all of my calla lily stems! I was incredibly baffled that she would just walk up onto the porch and do that. What I said to her was "Uhm.. Those are my flowers.." (such mean and rude fighting words!) She then took off like a bat out of hell while knocking off the plant pot onto the concrete below. (I think knocking it over was purely accidental but it still doesn't excuse what she was doing.) I got dressed and went next door to ask what the heck that was all about and she "informed" me that I must have mistaken her for someone else. After a few minutes of arguing I gave up and came back to clean up the mess. I figured I would just not worry about it, certainly nothing worth involving the law. On the plus side, about noon there was a knock on my door and a slightly larger, new plant pot was sitting on my porch with no one around. (I wonder who left it.. Hmmmm...) The actual act of picking the flowers doesn't bug me too terribly seeing as my niece picks the flowers almost every time one blooms. It is the lack of honesty that caused the issue for me.

This little story actually happened a little while ago, I had to use the "Today" form because of the page's standard, but at least I can tell you how it ends. I moved into the flat when I was barely 19, while the flatmate-stalker (also nicknamed The 28 Years Old Virgin) was seven years older than me. He started to be obsessed with me after we went to the cinema together (the other two flatmates were supposed to come with us but they didn't), and he got convinced we were on a date. I didn't move out because at the time I was quite naive and I was getting together well with everyone else, plus the flat was really close to my uni and relatively cheap, and I thought that he was about to graduate anyway. His parents, for the records, are creepier than him: his dad came to visit once and my roommate caught him opening our wardrobe and going through our clothes, about a month before this episode. After graduation he had to move out because his mum wasn't willing to pay for the rent anymore and found him a job (he wanted to stay a bit longer but fortunately didn't happen), and came to visit unannounced a few times. About one year after he sent me a text out of nowhere (I didn't speak with him for months) saying that it was over and he was sorry if he did something to make me want to break up with him, so I guess that at that point after imagining us dating and getting together I probably left him. I hear he's doing fine and got his first girlfriend.

OP Captain is pushing 25 lbs. he's a big cat. And is very violent when he's scared. Also he likes to hide in odd places. So the recling couch is his favorite fort. The rest of you, I'm Not explaining shit. I