Awkward

AI is going to destroy us all

By AI hates me - 28/05/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I was messing with an AI art generator. As luck would have it, it generated a nasty NSFW image just as my mom happened to walk by, despite my prompt being 100% innocent. It was also just after I got a nice, wholesome result, so I was smiling at the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 185

You deserved it 458

What would you do?

By Anonymous - 28/05/2024 20:00 - Philippines - Bacoor

Today, I don't know what to do. I like my BFF, and I really don't know what to do. I want to confess my feelings for her, but I don't think she will like me back because we're only supposed to be friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 178

Busted

By Anonymous - 26/05/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my perfect princess sister is finally going to jail where she belongs. My parents, who doted on her while dumping shit on me, blame me for “being a bad influence and not talking to the judge on her behalf.” I’m a technical engineer; what influence do they think I have in a criminal court? FML

I agree, your life sucks 566

You deserved it 103

Funny story…

By Anonymous - 25/05/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I met my girlfriend’s parents for the first time. I wanted to break the ice, so I brought up a funny story… about my ex-girlfriend, without thinking. The room fell silent, and my girlfriend’s mom just stared at me. My girlfriend left the room in tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 873

Wage slave

By Janet - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boss called me into his office. I thought I was getting promoted because my sales had been really high lately. My boss shut his door behind me and asked me if I could comb his hair with a lice comb to get rid of his lice. I had to do it to keep my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 840

You deserved it 3 249

I'm on my way!

By Anonymous - 24/05/2024 12:00 - United States - Tulsa

Today, I was running late for work and sprinted to catch the bus. As I got on, panting heavily, I realized I'd forgotten my wallet. The driver gave me a pity look and let me ride for free. I thanked him and sat down, only to discover I was on the wrong bus, heading in the opposite direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 251

Let me out

By Anonymous - 23/05/2024 07:00 - United States - Fairfield

Today, I found out that shorts are inappropriate to wear in the office. If it wasn't the staff-wide meeting or my coworker telling me to change, I've been sitting in the back praying it's time to clock out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 575

Crossed wires

By Anonymous - 23/05/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I sent a romantic, flirty text to my boyfriend. A few minutes later, I got a reply from… my mom, saying, “I don’t think this was meant for me, but thanks for making my day awkward.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 243

You deserved it 425

Humblebrag High

By danny - 23/05/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I went to my high school reunion. I've had a huge glow up since then, and I noticed plenty of women who never spoke to me at the time trying to hit it off with me. It seems the partners of some of those women got jealous and started pressing me. Now I'm getting bullied for being hot? FML

I agree, your life sucks 422

You deserved it 139

Suspicious minds

By Anonymous - 22/05/2024 14:00 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, I found out that my fiancé has been lying about where she lives to avoid me. I think she's also sleeping with who was supposed to be the best man at our wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 545

You deserved it 107

There must be more to the story…

By Jobless - 22/05/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I accidentally mistyped "one sec" as "one sex" in a group chat at work. I apologized and corrected myself immediately, but some bitch with too much free time was so offended that she reported me to HR anyway. I'm suspended while they look into it, and my girlfriend is convinced I did it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 558

You deserved it 97

Oh, hai Mark!

By Jill - 22/05/2024 09:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I ran into my ex at our local supermarket. Trying to be aloof, I waved casually, but I misjudged the distance and knocked over a display of canned beans. My ex just stood there, laughing, while I scrambled to rearrange up my mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 370

Outta control

By brother - 21/05/2024 21:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I had to have a serious talk with my little sister about trying to hook up with my friends. Married or not. She just turned 18 but I’m hoping this was the first and last time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 456

You deserved it 82

You OK, bro?

By Dante - 21/05/2024 19:00 - Portugal - Povoa de Santa Iria

Today, my sister's boyfriend asked for tips on how to please her in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 525

You deserved it 112

Blinders

By Asshole Parker - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to work early and saw my crush's car in the parking lot, so I parked next to her. After that, I looked over at her car to see her staring at me with a weird look and her saying, "Really?" Then she gestured around the lot; I looked around to find it completely empty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 660

You deserved it 8 005

Small world, huh?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Maidenhead

Today, I was talking to my best friend about how much of an asshole my ex-boyfriend is. After about 2 hours of non-stop bitching, it turns out she's actually dating him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 496

You deserved it 1 594

RSVP classic

By Anonymous - 19/05/2024 23:00

Today, despite checking, double-checking, and triple-checking before we sent them to every member of our friends and family, some who live in foreign countries, our wedding invitations somehow had not one, but two spelling mistakes. They misspelled my surname and the address of the church. FML

I agree, your life sucks 187

You deserved it 462

New hire

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Brazil - Jacare

Today, my mom started her new job; she's now my new coworker. She's already told the other girl I'd said she talks too much, and has berated me for not calling her "Mom" while at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 552

You deserved it 2 952

Congratulations, you played yourself

By What have I done - 19/05/2024 10:00 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I asked a girl from Bumble for a full body pic. She was obese, so I told her it wasn’t gonna work. She then sent a video of her in real time looking slim and told me that picture was from when she was obese, and she'd sent that picture as a “test of my character” and she’s “better off without someone so judgy.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 317

You deserved it 1 276

Soundproofing

By Anonymous - 18/05/2024 19:00

Today, after days of hearing our new neighbour abusing his wife, my wife went round to confront him while on the phone with the police. Turns out they are just really into their BDSM and had no idea how loud they were being. They have costumes, toys and everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 469

You deserved it 165

Good intentions…

By Anonymous - 18/05/2024 09:00 - Germany

Today, I drove for three hours to surprise a girl after surgery. My truck broke down outside her place, and it turns out she's over an hour away at her family's place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 203

Bitter

By StepFather - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States - Lake Worth

Today, I found out that my step-daughter, who is 29, still living at home, who I've completely supported since marrying her mother 16 years ago, wants her cousin to walk her down the aisle at her wedding two years from now and not me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 547

You deserved it 359

Leave me out of this feud

By Anonymous - 17/05/2024 10:00 - Canada - Etobicoke

Today, two girls who are in my class tried to talk to me about each other, not knowing the other had already spoken to me. They are best friends, but also hate each other, and seem to have taken me as the one to shit talk to about each other constantly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 86

Poppin' off

By NEED EYE BLEACH - 17/05/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, my mom has developed a new addiction: Watching Dr. Pimple Popper religiously. Also, she's suggested that maybe we should move to California so Dr. Lee could have a look at me. Yes, my skin problems are that bad. I don't need to be reminded of it, much less every single day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 97

Am I being Punk'd?

By Anonymous - 16/05/2024 19:00

Today, my boyfriend and I introduced our parents to each other, and they seemed to have already met somewhere, so I asked them about it. At first they seemed shifty, then guilty, then admitted everything. They’ve actually known each other for decades as part of the same swingers group. FML

I agree, your life sucks 551

You deserved it 135

Thanks for the reminder

By have no mom - 16/05/2024 03:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I was comforting my friend who has a toxic relationship with her Mom. She said, "If I'm such a failure, they always make it known that I can't live up to their expectations." It caught me a bit off guard when she said, "I wish she would just leave me alone and leave my life just like your mom did." FML

I agree, your life sucks 380

You deserved it 74

Choose your moments

By Anonymous - 15/05/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend stopped in the middle of sex because she had sudden inspiration about what colour to repaint our bedroom, and wanted to find the colour name online before she forgot it. By the time she was done, I’d gone soft and grumpy, and she got mad I didn’t want to finish having sex anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470

You deserved it 161

Shortcut

By Anonymous - 14/05/2024 06:00 - United States - Clifton Park

Today, I clicked on a shortcut that I'd made years ago, not remembering what it was. It sent a message to my ex, who I’m in no contact with, which said, “I love you.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 193

You deserved it 529

Nitwit

By Anonymous - 13/05/2024 15:00 - Mexico - Mexico City

Today, I accidentally started a fire in my apartment's bathroom while I was high. Last night my girlfriend and I had a chat about how she can't trust me 100%. I feel like an absolute idiot and she's rightfully upset with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 887

Trading places

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Bremerton

Today, my date ditched me and showed up with another guy at the same restaurant. She even tried to take the reservation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 642

You deserved it 2 856

Keywords

Animals Cats Awkward Christmas Health Embarrassing Work Love Anniversary Boredom Abuse Ironic Intimacy Alcohol Am I overreacting? Drunk Transportation AITA Parents Gun control Kids Language Noise Mysterious Relatable Money Delivery Miscellaneous Food Family

The Top

Today, at our work's Christmas party, our manager got completely trashed and let it slip that our branch is closing. Some of us will be transferred, but about 2/3 of us, including the manager, will be fired on the 1st of January FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 86

Today, I was having dinner at a restaurant with my best friend and her 18-month-old. I really had to fart, so I let one go silently, hoping it would go unnoticed. I caught a whiff of it, but so did my friend apparently, because she made a face and then held up her baby to smell her diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 542

You deserved it 1 376

The Top

Today, I accidentally bumped into the fire alarm which set off a high pitched buzzing noise that could be heard throughout the entire dorm. It went on for at least two hours and none of the technicians could figure out how to turn it off. All the girls on my floor are mad at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 018

You deserved it 7 062

Today, I discovered that the vitamin I've been taking for hair growth actually works really well. Unfortunately, it only works on my leg hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 711

You deserved it 1 837

Today, my wife has gotten into the habit of commenting on how much more attractive men in Latin soap operas are than me. When I suggested that an older character on the show looked like her mom, she started crying, and yelling about how hard the actress's life has been. FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 103

Today, my 5-year-old daughter drew a picture of our family. A typical drawing for a 5-year-old. Sticks and straws. One had two round shapes on its chest. "Is that mommy and is that one me?" I asked. "No daddy," she said. "You’re this one," she said while pointing out the one with boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 336

You deserved it 474

Today, I found out that the man I called grandpa for 40 years is really my dad. My drunk aunt spilled the beans. Her exact words were, "My dad is a better dad to you than he EVER was to me! You never wondered why he treated you better than his other grandchildren? You're his son!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 150

You deserved it 86

Today, my girlfriend made a patronising post on Facebook, "to all you guys out there" saying how having sex with a drunk person is straight-up, 100% rape. I pointed out that she's had sex with me several times after I've come home drunk. That pissed her off. Now I'm single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 337

You deserved it 5 148