Kids

OK, even though I've been commenting throughout, time for a full follow up. 1. I am not an idiot that's letting my child beat the crap out of me. When he does get too hard, he is disciplined and shown how to be gentle. 2. I have not given up on teaching my child manners, not to hit, etc. It's going to be a long 18 years because they're brothers. They're gonna fight! My sister and I beat each other on a fairly regular basis when we were kids. It's what siblings do. 3. Thanks for ALL your posts! Some of them had me cracking up. And some had me a little scared for the poster or their (future?) children.

By Anonymous - 18/02/2014 16:31 - United States

Today, while waiting in line at a store, a toddler behind me was throwing a major meltdown while his father yelled at him, giving me a migraine. I turned to the woman behind me and said, "Can you believe this kid? I feel sorry for his mother." Turns out the woman was his mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 108

You deserved it 46 655

By LittleArtist - 18/02/2014 01:01 - United States - Bessemer

Today, after three weeks of hard work, I finally finished painting my room. Apparently my 6-year-old brother thought I wasn't done and that he should help me out. I now have little red handprints all over my white walls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 316

You deserved it 5 290

Call CPS

By lyss - 16/02/2014 22:44 - United States - Pottsville

Today, I went to pick up my goddaughter while her mother went to work. She was being fussy, and I was surprised when she was quiet in the car; I just figured she'd fallen asleep. I got to my house and realized I'd never put her in my car, she was still sitting in my friend's driveway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 381

You deserved it 49 891

By EmmaleeSupertramp - 14/02/2014 03:16 - United States

Today, it was the first dress rehearsal at a community theater. I'm playing a grandma to a bunch of little kids, and the guy who is playing the grandpa wears a fat suit. I put on my costume and one of the kids comes up to me and says, "Are you wearing a fat suit too?" and pokes my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 712

You deserved it 6 976

By Anonymous - 13/02/2014 15:47 - United States - Kennett

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 519

You deserved it 53 113

By Anonymous - 11/02/2014 19:10 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, I discovered that when one of my toddlers throws up, the other sympathy-pukes too, and that this continues until they're both empty. I guess my car is going to stink of vomit for a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 393

You deserved it 3 711

Spotified

By aarong - 10/02/2014 06:42 - United States - Tampa

Today, I found my daughter's "sex songs" playlist. I was more disappointed by her poor taste in music than the fact that she is already sexually active. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 524

You deserved it 8 000

By sierraleeannee - 09/02/2014 06:44 - United States

Today, I was breast feeding my son. Out of nowhere, he bit my nipple hard, causing me to scream in pain. He giggled with my nipple still between his teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 288

You deserved it 7 250

sierraleeannee tells us more.

sierraleeannee 13

Sunday 9 February 2014 12:59

OP here. I can't believe this got posted before I went to bed! Hahaha! For some reason this got edited out, but he ended up smacking me in the face after he bit me. He's 9 months old so he thinks it's hilarious obviously. And I'm not sure why it didn't show my name, I posted it while logged in. And as for the person who said time for bottle feeding, he won't take a bottle, which is fine with me! He's teething so he tends to bite more when he is. Glad to know my son has made people laugh :)

By Evolution mama - 05/02/2014 19:52 - Iceland - Reykjav

Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 202

You deserved it 24 270

By LadyDeadpool88 - 04/02/2014 14:50 - United States - Laurinburg

Today, I'm a little over a month pregnant. My fiancé has decided that if we both act like I'm not pregnant, "the baby will get the hint and go away". FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 942

You deserved it 7 291

By pinknicki87 - 03/02/2014 17:34 - United States - Charleston

Today, after months of looking at cribs and picking out the perfect one for my unborn daughter, the store informed me that they no longer make that crib, even though the model is right there on the sales floor. I had to leave as my hormones got the best of me and I started bawling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 467

You deserved it 5 444

pinknicki87 tells us more.

pinknicki87 5

Thursday 6 February 2014 18:41

OP here. Thank you so much for all your kind and supportive words. I seem to be emotional over everything lately. Thank goodness I have such a supportive husband. I know everything happens for a reason, and we will find the perfect crib. Obviously that one wasn't meant to be.

By juice723 - 02/02/2014 02:07 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my mom announced to everyone that she wants at least ten grandchildren. I'm an only child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 208

You deserved it 3 900

juice723 tells us more.

juice723 9

Sunday 2 February 2014 15:50

So yeah I've seen some comments asking for a follow up... I'm a girl. my mom has always said that her greatest regret was not having more children herself, but she's, you know, going through menopause... So I think wanting a lot of grandchildren is her way of making up for that. She has also clarified that she will be happy with four grandchildren, which is what I want to have. It was just wishful thinking that she could have that many grandchildren to help raise. Sorry if this long comment is confusing, but I hope it helps to clear things up!

By Anonymous - 30/01/2014 12:34 - United States

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 545

You deserved it 6 887