Money

Reign of terror

By Anonymous - 17/07/2022 14:00

Today, as part of my dad's campaign to force me to move out, he has decided that he is now a nudist. As soon as he gets home every day, he strips and sets his meat and potatoes free to swing in the breeze. I want to move out, desperately, but I can’t afford to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 247

You deserved it 283

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

By Anonymous - 17/07/2022 01:00 - United Kingdom

Today, after my housemate handed in his notice to vacate without telling me beforehand, I had few days whilst working to make a decision to stay or vacate. In a panic, I chose vacate. On my day off I sat down with my finances and discovered I can't afford elsewhere. I asked to stay, my landlord put up rent by 50%. I might now become homeless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 251

Not the brightest

By FJBforever - 13/07/2022 14:00

Today, I thought it would be cool to record an Instagram reel pumping gas and put a recording of Donald Trump saying how Biden’s presidency will cause gas prices to go up. I got so distracted with editing that my gas tank ended up overflowing, and it poured everywhere. I spent all the money I had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 186

You deserved it 2 685

Drumming up business

By Anonymous - 13/07/2022 06:00

Today, I was reported for mortgage fraud. The reason? A distant cousin wanted to congratulate me on my new home, but she was upset that I didn’t go through the lender she works for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 025

You deserved it 109

Nice try, kiddo

By Anonymous - 12/07/2022 22:00

Today, my 9 year-old son actually thought he could blackmail me for money and an Xbox with a very badly photoshopped picture of me in bed with Hermione from the Harry Potter films. My wife thinks this is hilarious, but I’m worried if he’s doing this at 9, what will he be doing at 18? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 241

Privatisation

By Lawrie - 12/07/2022 10:00

Today, the bus I needed to catch, that replaced the train I needed to catch, to get the flight home was full. I had to get a taxi instead. £140 to the nearest working train station. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 98

Treat yourself

By PoorAndHungry - 10/07/2022 18:00

Today, strapped for money, I asked one of my good friends to loan me some. She said no, because she’s broke herself. I later see her checked in on NOBU, a high class, expensive restaurant, on Facebook and she’d bought a new designer purse and shoes with the hashtag #TreatYourself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 531

You deserved it 1 857

Capitalism, baby

By Anonymous - 10/07/2022 12:00

Today, I actually had to attend court for an unfair dismissal claim. The woman I fired had an attendance record of 70%, money is still missing from petty cash, and she was twice caught using a company laptop for online gambling, yet somehow it still made it to a courtroom as “unfair”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 337

You deserved it 92

A liar AND a cheapskate

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Fort Myers

Today, I was at K-Mart and saw an exact copy of my engagement ring for twenty bucks. The same one that had supposedly been in my fiancé's family for generations, and worth thousands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 260

You deserved it 3 150

It never rains, it pours

By Anonymous - 06/07/2022 21:00 - United States - Mountain View

Today, I got short-changed for a 12-pack of Mountain Dew. but I let it slide, even though they charged me double. i get home and immediately the box exploded and all the cans went falling down a flight of wooden stairs onto concrete. Fourteen stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 216

Slippery when oiled

By Anonymous - 03/07/2022 12:00

Today, as I walked with a coworker to my office through a gas station, I slid on some oil and fell right on my ass. He helped by holding my lunch. My jeans are ruined and I'm too broke to buy a new pair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 781

You deserved it 112

Malicious

By Anonymous - 02/07/2022 12:00

Today, after the opportunity for a little malicious compliance came my way, and I did exactly what my prick boss told me to do, knowing it would screw him over in about a week, it happened. Unfortunately, he has a good legal team and he just successfully sued me for £100,000. I may have to sell my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 616

Independence day

By Anonymous - 01/07/2022 10:00

Today, I got a text from my dad asking about my car in the shop. I'm trying to show them that I can actually be independent, but now they know that not only will it cost all my savings account to fix it, but also that my boyfriend will be driving me to work for the next month while the shop waits for the parts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 656

You deserved it 151

Roommates from hell, part 47757

By Sofvcked - 29/06/2022 10:00

Today, I found out when my new roommate said she was self-employed, she really meant unemployed. She insists that I let her stay for free or she will file a sexual assault case against me. Rent is due on the 10th. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 031

You deserved it 157

The power of the cardboard box

By Never ever again - 23/06/2022 04:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I’m kicking myself for buying and setting up an elaborate cat tree I thought my cats would love. The second I was done, they walked over to it, sniffed around, and went to sleep in the box it came in instead, and won’t go near the darn thing. It might as well be a $200 cardboard box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 652

You deserved it 290

Social parasites

By Anonymous - 21/06/2022 16:00

Today, after pointing out to my landlord that they have taken nearly $6k from me through illegal rent increases, I was evicted for the first time in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 1 169

Seize the means

By Anonymous - 21/06/2022 00:00

Today, the person recently hired to work in my spot during my days off started at a higher hourly rate than me, after I have been here for nearly three years. I asked for a raise and got a dollar more; meanwhile, my regional counterparts make 4 dollars more per hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 864

You deserved it 171

IRS FML

By Anonymous - 19/06/2022 20:00 - United States - Spartanburg

Today, I got a letter from the IRS informing me that I owed a debt of $80 dollars from 4 years ago, and that it has now grown to over $800 dollars, and it's due this month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 890

You deserved it 264

Exploitation

By Anonymous - 18/06/2022 14:00

Today, I quit my job after being the only one to do my job, the boss's job, and the other guy’s job. Their way of saying thank you for being the best employee they'd had was to fuck me on my paycheque and give me $70 for a week's work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 919

You deserved it 119

Send me some money

By ShouldHaveBeenKing - 16/06/2022 14:00 - Australia - Annandale

Today, I discovered that I'm actually descended from wealthy and powerful landowners in Bangladesh. I live in a two-bedroom rented flat and work as an admin in a daycare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 722

You deserved it 192

Scammy family

By scammed - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Phoenix

Today, I found out after spending my life's income on paying for my grandma's cancer treatment that she has been faking it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 801

You deserved it 3 697

Get off your ass

By Anonymous - 13/06/2022 22:00

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I wouldn't use $5,000 to build him a new gaming computer with my surrogate compensation, even though he basically refuses to get a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 006

You deserved it 260

Money for nothing

By Anonymous - 13/06/2022 10:00

Today, four years after coming back home from working in another country, I got a tax bill from that country. For my income there from two years ago. If they give me the money I supposedly earned, I'll gladly pay those taxes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 886

You deserved it 89

Nice try

By Anonymous - 11/06/2022 22:00

Today, I was texted out of the blue by a girl I treated to dinner last year. Since then, we'd chatted and met in passing a few times, but she'd turned down or cancelled all my other date invitations. Sadly, she wasn't trying to meet up. She wanted $500 to benefit a male friend, who was down on his luck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 122

Legalese

By Anonymous - 10/06/2022 00:00

Today, after years of telling my sister she's crazy for thinking our parents have been playing favorites all our lives, with me being the favorite, I saw in their will I got the house, both cars, and all their money. Meanwhile, all she got mom's old clothes, "if she can fit in them." FML

I agree, your life sucks 888

You deserved it 479

Capitalism, baby

By Anonymous - 09/06/2022 00:00

Today, I have a good job, good credit, no outstanding loans or credit card debt, good savings and so on, yet when I applied for a mortgage for a £100,000 house, I was offered a measly £35,000. What the fuck should I buy with that, a second hand wet cardboard box? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 068

You deserved it 156

Stingy

By Anonymous - 08/06/2022 06:00

Today, I had no money on me, so I asked my husband to put money in the cancer charity box for me. He grumbled about it, then realised he only had £10 notes, so he gave them a tenner but asked the lady if she could break open the sealed box to give him £9 in change. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 270

Recession

By Anonymous - 08/06/2022 04:00

Today, I made my last mortgage payment and can finally save more money from my pay each month. I’m retiring next week and my pension isn’t even close to my wage. I was better off when I was working to pay the mortgage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 819

You deserved it 167

Take a break

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while on a cruise that I paid for, I was forced to babysit my 5 bratty nieces while my sister and her deadbeat boyfriend relaxed in the kid free zone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 086

You deserved it 5 589

Scammers gonna scam

By BlackHoleSun. - 05/06/2022 16:00

Today, it was the day that I had been waiting for weeks to arrive: I finally finished the hiring process for my new job… Only to find out not only my paycheck, but the job itself was fake. Thanks Indeed, my first new bank account after years of debt, my disability, and my will to live greatly appreciate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 026

You deserved it 145

Keywords

Embarrassing Miscellaneous Christmas Work Cute Am I overreacting? Holidays Cats Awkward Gifts Shopping Friends Health Hair Relatable Poopoo peepee Money Education Animals Gross Cops Sex Intimacy Neighbours Love Smells Painful First Dates Grieving Social Media

The Top

Today, I woke up after a night out at the bar, immediately remembering that I had lost my cell phone, my ID, and somehow spent $100. Feeling like shit already, my friend then went on to tell me that I flashed the entire bar, and ran around the hotel naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 998

You deserved it 42 387

Today, my 14 year-old son asked to join my buddies and me at the gun range. The second I finished the safety lecture and handed him a pistol, he started twirling it on his finger (thankfully, it was unloaded). I smacked him in the head and took him home. Now he's moping and sulking like a bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 539

You deserved it 196

The Top

Today, I was going to check out my secret condom stash. When I looked inside, I found a note. The note read: "Thanks hun, I really needed this. Love, Mom". FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 499

You deserved it 8 031

Today, I found out my husband put a parental block on the TV so I couldn't rent a movie. I'm 42. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 041

You deserved it 8 497

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend, she tells me that the flab on my stomach does not turn her on, and stops in the middle of it. Therefore, until my diet is over, guess who doesn't get any. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 973

You deserved it 22 733

Today, my mother was transferred from the hospital to a long-term care facility. Nobody I talk to at the hospital knows what facility they sent her to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 749

You deserved it 221

Today, I got rear-ended while on my way to work. This wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't pregnant, suffering from a horrible UTI, and running a fever. My boss called in sick, so now I'm stuck running the office alone. With whiplash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 065

You deserved it 3 022

Today, I spent a wonderful day with my girlfriend. I got her everything she wanted, and drained my wallet. On the walk home she noticed a license plate that had an ex-girlfriend's name on it. She saw me looking and accused me of still being in love with my ex, and stormed off. After throwing salad in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 955

You deserved it 5 045