Sex and Intimacy: Blown job - FML

Blown job

By Noname - 12/03/2009 09:30 - New Zealand

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 955

You deserved it 339 270

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Same thing different taste

Beam me up!

By saynotochrispine - 28/07/2009 04:15 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me that we could try living out one of his fantasies. When I showed up ready to go, he began playing the theme song to Star Trek and asked me to call him Mr. Spock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 313

You deserved it 7 959

By May - 04/09/2011 04:08 - United States

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend masturbating furiously. To Star Trek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 814

You deserved it 6 263

By Anonymous - 01/10/2009 05:56 - Canada

Spicy

Today, while I was getting it on with my girlfriend I accidentally called out "Mom" instead of her name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 500

You deserved it 44 097

Repetitive

By justgreat - 24/03/2012 02:30 - United States - Opa Locka

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 600

You deserved it 6 222

By NOKHAN - 25/10/2013 17:17 - United States - Durham

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I watched Star Trek Into Darkness together. He liked it so much that he's now chosen to yell "KHAAANNNNN!" as he cums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 112

You deserved it 7 252

By eeh - 07/05/2009 14:45 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 643

You deserved it 103 460

The Force

By RobinBunny713 - 19/07/2011 03:23 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic moment when I made a Star Wars reference. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I said it or the fact that he seemed more turned on by it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 802

You deserved it 34 377

Timing

By Anonymous - 18/03/2017 07:00 - United States - Westerville

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a blowjob. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "What's that thing at the back of your throat called?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 611

You deserved it 1 192

Stuff

By BOO! - 25/05/2019 04:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head. When I came, she was scared of the "stuff" that came out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 222

You deserved it 404

By man - 30/10/2009 16:34 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me amazing head. I was really getting into it, when she looked up, and gave me a thumbs up. I can never take oral sex seriously again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 127

You deserved it 23 508

Next

Top comments

rebboy_2008 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:06

I don't know what's worse: the fact that you called her Spock or the fact that Spock was on your mind while getting a bj. Either way, you lose.

millycent 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:06

Why are you watching anything other than **** while getting blown? Or anything at all? Fail.

Comments

sproutsfury420 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 19:17

Trek ftw..your girl should be honored that you accidentally called her one of the best characters in the Trek universe.

eff_that 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 21:03

umm no! thats jus ****** up i hope to god that she stoped!

mathews666 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 1:06

this made me pee my pant legit if i were the girl i woulda walked out laughin my ass off

mathews666 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 1:20

these comments made me cry spock someone shoulda gotten that on tape ithink the world would have been flooded with pee from people pissing themselves THIS IS MY FAVORITE

_parsnips 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 7:17

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

diana491141 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 12:07

People who watch Star Trek get laid and I don't? FML.

wwtrayn 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 21:17

.... It's her fault for giving a Trecky a BJ...

kschooner 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 23:39

lol trekkies rule ;)

pointeprincess18 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 4:20

dickk lol

RunZoneFive 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 7:06

That is so hilarious, funniest FML I've seen yet

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Relatable Embarrassing Awkward Health Love Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Work Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic

The Top

Today, thinking no one was home, I decided to be a little frisky with my boyfriend. I guess I was being loud and woke up my sleeping autistic brother the room over. Halfway through, he burst through the door, panicking. He thought I was having another one of my asthma attacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 981

You deserved it 9 781

Today, my husband threw a bitch-fit and made passive aggressive remarks throughout the entire day. What did I do? Call him out on commenting an eggplant, peach, and winky face emoji under a female friend’s picture. He deactivated all social media accounts and shouted, “Are you happy now? I can’t talk to anyone now!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 563

You deserved it 96

The Top

Today, my mother taught my 98-year-old great-uncle to knock on the wall if he needs us. He can't remember who we are, but every hour he can remember to knock to ask, "Is it breakfast yet?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 819

You deserved it 4 149

Today, I was running late for an important meeting and couldn't find my car keys. After searching around for way too long, I finally realised where they were - in the pocket of the pants I'd worn the day before, which were now spinning around in the now-unstoppable, two-hour washing machine cycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 647

You deserved it 408

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's house. I had a shower while he went downstairs. As I went to say goodbye to him, his mother muttered, "Slut" while pouring him orange juice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 566

You deserved it 22 106

Today, after a day spent together, the police came to my girlfriend's place, telling me to leave without explanation. I'm now at a hotel, discovering she made false, negative statements about me in papers they provided. Despite recent love and commitment, it seems she wants to break up, leaving me confused and alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 542

You deserved it 117

Today, I went to look at a used car I was really looking forward to driving. It wasn't in as good condition as I'd hoped. The seller still expected me to buy it, even after he had to spray in half a can of Oklahoma Choke octane booster just to get it to fire up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 86

Today, I had to explain to my gaming friends that I can't be a night owl anymore because of a major health scare where I was suddenly unable to sleep at all. I now have to take sleeping pills every night and abide by a strict sleeping schedule. My friends are bummed out, and I feel bad for them. Fuck insomnia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 835

You deserved it 206