Sex, Embarrassing and Wanker: Caught in the act - FML

Caught in the act

By urmommmm - 22/08/2009 16:25 - United States

Spicy

Today, it was my birthday. My parents came into my room at 12:01 to surprise me. Do you know what fifteen year-olds do at midnight? FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 346

You deserved it 25 417

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Same thing different taste

Sweet Sixteen

By Anonymous - 17/09/2021 13:59 - Netherlands

Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 083

You deserved it 97

By Saphira - 11/11/2009 06:43 - United States

Today, my dad's girlfriend threw me a birthday party and all the gifts, decorations, and the cake were according to my age, which they thought was 12. I turned 13 today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 258

You deserved it 8 076

Hush, Mother

By Anonymous - 06/07/2024 22:00 - United States - Reno

Today, I went to a surprise birthday party for a friend. Everyone was hiding and waiting to yell "Surprise!" when I got a call from my mom. I was loudly discussing family gossip and trying to get my mom to hang up when the door opened. Everyone yelled "Surprise!" and then turned to stare at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77

You deserved it 1 066

By TooShort - 03/05/2009 14:06 - United States

Today, I walked into a restaurant with my parents to celebrate my Mom's birthday. They immediately got a kid's menu and crayons out for me. I'm 15. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 378

You deserved it 8 612

By thissucks - 21/02/2011 22:20 - United States

Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 572

You deserved it 3 420

By soliveyerlife - 21/03/2009 09:35 - United States

Today, my parents yelled at me for coming home at 1am this morning from a friend's birthday party. I'm 30 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 047

You deserved it 128 105

By Anonymous - 02/06/2011 04:17

Today, I threw myself a surprise party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 616

You deserved it 18 376

Happy Birthday baby!

By Anonymous - 06/12/2020 18:02 - Philippines - Quezon City

Today, it's my birthday. My parents wished me a happy one via text message. We live in the same house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 888

You deserved it 97

By Anonymous - 02/08/2013 15:29 - United States - Denver

Today, I turned 17. My parents completely forgot it was my birthday, and when I reminded them, my dad thought it was my 18th. He was ecstatic and mentioned that I can "finally get the hell out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 517

You deserved it 3 459

By 00bsg - 21/12/2013 15:46 - United States - Salem

Today, it's my 21st birthday. All my friends and family said they were busy so I figured I was getting a surprise party. Nope. They all were actually busy. I spent my birthday alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 104

You deserved it 4 339

Next

Top comments

aznboytellem 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:03

WERE U PLAYIN POKEMANZ?

tyhillman 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 20:57

Ha at least it was dark, either way sucks for you

Comments

coopert28 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:12

#5- he was jacking off

zapskimmer 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:12

sex dumbass

loverslanex3 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 23:56

um...no...

LinsKitty 0

Sunday 11 April 2010 21:28

You're the dumbass, dumbass... :)

IamSpartacus 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:13

YDI for turning 15.

guinness_fml 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 22:12

38 win

lamo_kidd 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:13

That's a great way to celebrate your birthday. lol

anonacs 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:15

**** you for making people guess.

ky_stone22 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:16

Umm...FYL? YDI? I'm not sure, because I'm 15, and I'm asleep at midnight. Sorry, can't understand.

Meg_Me456 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 23:57

thats what i was doing at midnight when i was 15

JukeboxBunny 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:18

This is such a wonderful, eclectic, random group of comments. I love how about 92% of the people are confused about what he's talking about, and there's a random "YDI for turning 15" thrown in for good measure. For the record, he was probably masturbating.

XxAngelXOhx 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:18

At midnight you were probably SLEEPING not jacking off! But usually go to sleep at 1 or 2 in the mornin so..

redbluegreen 40

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:19

...and that's just the icing on the cake. (; Oh wait. The cake is a lie.

lol2034 2

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:21

no the icing is at the tip lol

nirvanafreak 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 23:31

PORTAL! YOU PLAY PORTAL!

chippa 24

Saturday 22 August 2009 23:38

I LOVE PORTAL!

redbluegreen 40

Sunday 23 August 2009 5:23

Damn, you're onto me.

lamo_kidd 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:19

That's a great way to celebrate your birthday. lol

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Keywords

Money Health Kids Christmas You're fired Work Bodyshaming Customers Fat Love Facebook Am I overreacting? Social Media AITA Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Relatable Students Technology Education Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward

The Top

Today, while I was mid-act with my girlfriend, my mom unlocked my bedroom door and came in shaking maracas. She then handed them to my very shocked girlfriend and told her these were the "Busted maracas" and directed her to pass them along accordingly. Well, at least our first time was memorable… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 442

You deserved it 365

Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 886

You deserved it 61 114

The Top

Today, my son couldn't find all the parts to his Cub Scout uniform. I had a serious talk with him about being prepared, and how he would need to live with the consequences of not having the right outfit on. When we arrived at the meeting, everyone was in costumes because it's Halloween. I forgot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 759

You deserved it 44 122

Today, I had my six month employee review. My manager said that my attendance was good, and I was exceeding my targets performance wise. My reward, a five cent per hour pay cut. Apparently the rate at which I started is too high to meet their current pay scale. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 042

You deserved it 2 157

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 336

You deserved it 1 829

Today, as my husband and I were leaving our wedding reception, my mother-in-law hugged me and whispered in my ear, "You're gonna do great tonight!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 472

You deserved it 488

Today, I discovered that a high enough stress level can cause the same symptoms as the flu. So whenever things are quite awful at work, I get the added bonus of feeling like I’m coming down with something really nasty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 831

You deserved it 93

Today, while trying to explain to my friends what an anxiety attack is like, I had an anxiety attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 047

You deserved it 2 190