Intimacy: Close but no BJ

Close but no BJ

By nikkrissa_04 - 07/08/2009 11:17 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around in his car. I then decided I was going to give him a blowjob for the first time. As I was going down, he grabbed my chin and said, "Don't do that, your mouth isn't clean enough." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 675

You deserved it 12 201

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 29/06/2010 17:34 - Canada

Today, after going down on my boyfriend, we were cuddling and I went to kiss him. Just before I could reach his lips, he ran his finger over my mouth and whispered, "S-s-s-semen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 733

You deserved it 25 776

Spit or Swallow?

By buymeflavoredlube - 05/06/2018 05:00

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a long blowjob and had to pause for a minute because my mouth became exceedingly dry. His solution? Spit directly in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 747

You deserved it 974

Double standard

By NoSexForMe - 13/07/2014 07:46 - United States - Rancho Cucamonga

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 813

You deserved it 8 659

By Anonymous - 04/12/2010 00:11 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was making salsa and got jalepeno juice all over his mouth. A little bit later, he started going down me. He hadn't washed his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 066

You deserved it 5 900

By Brittany - 18/06/2012 14:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 910

You deserved it 38 047

Bad timing

By Proprepourtant - 16/04/2011 11:28 - France

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. This is the moment he chooses to exclaim, "Wow, you really do have a lot of dandruff!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 952

You deserved it 12 577

Ouch

By Anonymous - 14/12/2011 23:12 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 651

You deserved it 29 364

By soisblueballsdickhead - 26/10/2014 14:25 - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to give my boyfriend a blowjob. Barely 20 seconds in, he said: "I'll be honest, this is TERRIBLE." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 041

You deserved it 9 713

Bummed out

By Anon - 11/11/2023 04:00

Today, I tried to tease my boyfriend by pulling my skirt up, bending over, and backing up into him. He gagged and said, "Please, wash your ass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 789

By Anonymous - 19/06/2012 03:33 - United States

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 423

You deserved it 4 625

escape2music 0

Friday 7 August 2009 20:04

try brushing your teeth?

OneandOnlyOne 0

Friday 7 August 2009 20:28

Never ever offer to do it again. If he hints that he wants one, tell him his penis isn't clean enough for your mouth. He sounds like a REAL moron!

Comments

LadyAlathia 0

Saturday 8 August 2009 4:46

Am I the only one that thinks this might be a cover for him actually *not enjoying* oral sex? I mean, it's not everyone's cup of tea, but there's this huge societal expectation for people (and men in general) to obsess over ********. I can definitely understand why he'd want to hide the fact that he's NOT into oral. Maybe the idea of blowing his load in the same place he puts his tongue isn't his idea of a good time. Maybe he just doesn't like how it feels. Maybe he's a germophobe. Maybe he thinks oral sex is degrading to his partner. All of these are feasible option.

sockmonkey560 0

Saturday 8 August 2009 6:31

ya they are; i agree. this is not a fyl its a ydi or a who cares. just wash ur mouth...or dont do oral w/ him cuz he doesnt like it.

sorini 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 8:44

You're right mate. Everyone has diffrent tastes. ^^

luvluv_fml 0

Saturday 8 August 2009 5:11

break up with him, and come over my room, maybe i let you blow my dick, after you had brushed your teeth

sockmonkey560 0

Saturday 8 August 2009 6:27

haha thats funny! well, oral is disgusting anyway so ydi.

marcyang 5

Saturday 8 August 2009 6:37

I would never say no to a bj.

KevinC69 0

Saturday 8 August 2009 6:47

He probably has fordyce spots. Ask him about it.

nanoflacka 0

Saturday 8 August 2009 7:22

You should have said "and you think your dick is any better?!"

YummyumCum 0

Saturday 8 August 2009 7:52

haha i like #21 lol same blow me away~ lol btw dump that fawker

guyFromMiami 0

Saturday 8 August 2009 8:51

hellooo! havent you ever thought maybe his dick was dirty? or he had done something with someone else and didnt want to feel guilty for allowing you to do that without him cleaning the damn thing?!