Work: Crimefighters

Crimefighters

By Anonymous - 03/07/2009 19:56 - Canada

Today, I was at the park with a friend when I said, "Gotta go, sorry. I've got court in an hour." The lady on the bench next to us then loudly complained how disgusting I was for being a criminal and threw her bird seed at me, dirtying my suit. I'm a lawyer with a case in an hour, not a criminal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 401

You deserved it 3 875

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/12/2013 21:15 - Sweden - Uppsala

Today, I just about managed to convince the judge to overlook my client's emotional outbursts in the courtroom, promising that he'd be on his best behavior from now on. An hour later, he screamed "FUCK YOU!" at the judge for telling him to quiet down. I hate my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 534

You deserved it 4 239

By Anonymous - 17/03/2016 15:34 - United States - Pomona

Today, in court, my client ran his mouth at the judge, cursing him out and then trying to lecture him on "freedom of speech" when he was found in contempt. I don't know what it is with these nutjobs, but I wish I'd never become a public defender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 206

You deserved it 2 575

That ain't it

By Anonymous - 06/10/2022 13:30

Today, my tampon leaked right before I had to go to court. I'm the plaintiff and I work for my city, and blood stains isn't a good look. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 293

You deserved it 148

Nice day for a picnic

By litterbug - 06/07/2021 04:01

Today, I have to go to court to contest a bullshit citation I got in the local park. I’m pregnant and was picnicking with my kids when my toddler ran off. I took off after him, leaving my blanket and food. When I came back, the power tripping park ranger wrote me a ticket for littering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 364

You deserved it 118

By apav - 11/06/2009 11:52 - Australia

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 906

You deserved it 24 412

Trash

By Anonymous - 02/04/2017 16:00

Today, I confronted my lousy, loud, messy neighbors about the trash they throw in my yard. They responded by throwing my trash in their yard, then called the police to report me for vandalism and illegal dumping when I returned their trash. Guess who has a court appearance in two weeks… FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 821

You deserved it 445

By anonymous - 09/10/2014 22:09 - United States - San Francisco

Today, while arriving to a date for the first time in a couple years, the first thing out of his mouth was, "I'm only dressed up because I had court today." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 331

You deserved it 3 977

Bad boys bad boys

By Tom - 17/08/2011 18:27 - United States

Today, I went to court expecting to walk out a free man. Turns out my misdemeanor offense couldn't compare to the crime I committed when I walked into the court house with a switchblade tucked into my shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 439

You deserved it 108 496

Slammer

By Anonymous - 04/05/2013 01:14 - Netherlands

Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 294

You deserved it 3 801

By thegrandchawhee - 29/08/2015 17:13 - United States - Yakima

Today, I was scheduled to fill in at the customer service counter where I work. Today was also the day that I allegedly accused a customer of being a thief, sold her a fraudulent money order, and will be sued for defamation of character. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 048

You deserved it 1 813

Cheezburger_fml 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 1:59

Crazy ladies in the park always have bird seed to throw. FYL

sayhello_fml 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 2:00

How does bird seed dirty a suit?

Comments

lives_ppl 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 2:58

Ha! That assumption was pretty decent since most lawyers are criminals who just know how to get around the law. She had a good chance of being right.

jenkins56 5

Saturday 4 July 2009 3:01

'MOST lawyers' Where are you getting this 'most' from? Bad tv shows I'll bet. Grow up

rustyrox 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 2:59

Peoples ignorance is astounding, isn't it?

danielbudzynski 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 3:02

#19 haha Both have an a in them huh???

cybely 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 3:02

So do your job and sue her for offensive battery and trespass to chattels!

ITuMT 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 3:06

Dumb bitch. XD

Natscage 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 3:15

thug......lawyer.......same thing

princeton16 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 3:16

W-O-W. That sucks! And there's a difference between a "criminal" and someone who goes to court. Well, they could be the same thing, but you could be a lawyer, a judge, the guy who types everything out, a reporter, or even someone who got a parking ticket! That is really ignorant. Sry.

iSmellNice 2

Saturday 4 July 2009 4:19

Or some guy on jury duty

Aelaena 6

Saturday 4 July 2009 4:35

exactly (could have been testifying against someone as well)

4ube_fml 6

Saturday 4 July 2009 3:16

Or getting a divorce..

onealhart54 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 3:19

same thing

BAbyR 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 3:22

i wish i knew you. i wanna be a lawyer (well actually a district attorney)(if i get enough votes) lol but anyways i haveee soo many questions too ask a lawyer. ahh lol but nice fml.=)