Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: Dirty talk

Dirty talk

By Anonymous - 22/07/2010 05:52 - United States

Today, while having sex for our first time, my boyfriend decided to test out a theory he heard about, that conversation during sex makes it more enjoyable. His way of doing it? He looked me straight in the eye and asked, "How 'bout them Brewers?" We're from Wisconsin. That's our local sports team. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 073

You deserved it 5 280

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Same thing different taste

Gamer watch

By kristajoy2001 - 01/09/2019 00:02

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. All of the sudden, he whispered in my ear, "Do you want to hear a Minecraft joke?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 843

You deserved it 343

By Undefined - 01/01/2009 12:09 - France

Today, I was at a restaurant with my boyfriend. I look him straight in the eye and ask him: "What's the first thing you think about when you look at me?". His answer: "Can I finish my steak?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 331

You deserved it 8 636

Man City

By EpicBunBun - 10/05/2017 18:00

Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, I thought he went to change the music on his phone. He'd actually stopped mid-action just to check sports scores. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 270

You deserved it 719

By Djcc - 21/02/2012 18:03 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were watching TV, I asked him if he loved me. He turned up the volume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 985

You deserved it 7 113

By Seule - 29/06/2016 04:07 - Switzerland - Pully

Today, on a movie date with my boyfriend, it took me a while to understand why he was leaning on his elbow during the entire thing. He had an earpiece cupped in his hand and was listening to a soccer match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 221

You deserved it 1 704

Romance ain't dead

By awkwardbf - 09/09/2009 01:26 - United States

Today, I was sitting on my boyfriend's lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said, "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 992

You deserved it 4 893

Anticlimactic

By JC12345 - 18/03/2009 04:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Afterwards we went to Applebee's for dinner, then after we'd ate I asked, "How was it?" he says, "It was terrible", to which I said, "The food was that bad?" He replies, "No, the sex". FML

I agree, your life sucks 90 988

You deserved it 13 833

Baller move

By notafan - 07/08/2019 00:01 - United States

Today, I was at a baseball game. This kid in front of me had binoculars and was constantly shouting. Trying to amuse the girl next to me, I leaned over and said, "That kid probably has wet dreams about baseball." She got up and said to the kid, "Come on honey, we're leaving." FML

I agree, your life sucks 576

You deserved it 3 544

Sexy talk

By Anonymous - 09/01/2010 03:30 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 850

You deserved it 6 003

By missingcharlie - 17/08/2009 02:45 - United States

Today, in the middle of having sex with my boyfriend, instead of saying something sexy, he decided to tell me that the bowling alley had a new air hockey table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 151

You deserved it 5 701

bmadd 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 12:08

don't act like you didn't enjoy it

nateball 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 13:31

Yeah, that sounds like a Wisconsin person. he should have been doing you in the ass and said how about them Packers. now then it wood have made sense.

Comments

aardvarkish 16

Thursday 22 July 2010 12:24

For this FML: ask whether he's heard about the new Stay-Free.

booored 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 12:31

14 - your cute(:

selenagirl_fml 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 12:54

complete turn off huh?

randomlettrrs 8

Thursday 22 July 2010 15:24

23 ur hot

selenagirl_fml 0

Friday 23 July 2010 0:37

thx. I see where you get your name lol "random"

XxXMetalChicXxX 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 12:59

f your life for being from Wisconsin, cheesehead

slushpup9696 12

Friday 23 July 2010 2:53

stfu

nateball 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 13:31

Yeah, that sounds like a Wisconsin person. he should have been doing you in the ass and said how about them Packers. now then it wood have made sense.

tpike1296 11

Thursday 22 July 2010 17:05

haha...."wood" LOL!

icertainlysuck 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 22:40

best comment ever lol

mleighxOx 1

Thursday 22 July 2010 14:10

asy way to stop that act like a stupid blonde be like omg that's sexy kiss him start a crazy hot make out session and get on with the sex while making out then bam done time to leave

xXLenaXx 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 15:41

*brain explodes* When you talk in real life, do you make pauses? Ever? :P

marylovesyou8D 7

Thursday 22 July 2010 17:29

woahhhh you sorta look like amber from Teen Mom...

Angelita_tita 0

Friday 23 July 2010 4:32

52 I agree, I was annoyed wile reading it.xP

squirrels_FTW 3

Thursday 22 July 2010 14:12

yep, good sex..............NOT!!

joeinthedark 18

Thursday 22 July 2010 14:17

He was probably thinking about baseball so he would last longer.

armybarbie 1

Thursday 22 July 2010 14:33

29 = win

perdix 29

Thursday 22 July 2010 14:36

You should have waited until winter and the dirty talk would have focused on ice fishing. I'm sure all that talk about drilling the hole and spearing fish would provide hot double entendres!